


Time Heals

by WritinginCT



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe, D/s, Drama, F/M, Friendship, Keira Marcos' Ties That Bind, M/M, Multi, Romance, Scars, rape/torture recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-30
Updated: 2011-06-30
Packaged: 2017-11-09 21:43:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 53,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/458773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritinginCT/pseuds/WritinginCT
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Time may have healed their bodies, but for two damaged men assigned to Atlantis, it will take meeting each other to truly become whole again.</p><p>OMC/OMC, (ultimately OMC/OMC/Katie Brown)<br/>Warnings: rape/ torture recovery (non graphic descriptions of the assault itself)</p><p>Note: Set, with permission, in the alternate SGA universe The Ties That Bind created by Keira Marcos , which was inspired by xanthelj 's works Coming Home and General & Dr. Sheppard .</p>
            </blockquote>





	Time Heals

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Keira Marcos](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Keira+Marcos).



> Set, with permission, in the alternate SGA universe The Ties That Bind created by Keira Marcos , which was inspired by xanthelj 's works Coming Home and General & Dr. Sheppard .
> 
> Thanks to singletailwhip for the grammar beta! She's a master comma wrangler and error catcher!
> 
> Special thanks to Keira for letting me play in her sandbox and her support and beta. I adore the TTB series and I'm so excited to have permission to be a part of it- thank you, Keira!
> 
> This fic was inspired by the NCIS:LA episode with the facially scarred Marine finally allowing himself to go home. I kept wondering how in TTB, where physical beauty is so important, a scarred or disfigured person would fare. Could they find love and happiness in spite of their injuries? That little question bloomed into Time Heals. Enjoy! -CJ aka WritinginCT.
> 
> ps... I wrote up some answers to common questions I received in comments/feedback to Time Heals. I have included them as end notes for the final chapter of the fic. They do contain spoilers.
> 
> Link to cover art: http://www.nocturnalscribings.com/eFiction343/stories/1/images/timeheals800.jpg

 

\---------------

_Every base has urban legends about scenes taken too far and submissives maimed or killed, most are simply myth, made up of half-baked truths and dark fantasies. Some however, are based in fact, and are horrific beyond reason and some would say for those involved, beyond bearing. When the stories are shared over beers or in harsh whispers in the locker room, few would ever hope to meet a survivor from one of those dark tales. Little do those storytellers know, but those survivors exist, and they walk among them._

\---------------

Newly promoted Master Sergeant Joseph Olsen let out a deep breath when the door to Master Chief Frost's office closed behind him. His interview with Frost had to be _the_ most nerve-wracking thing that he had ever had to do. Frost was a consummate professional and had kept the interview strictly about the Atlantis mission and Joseph's place in it. Joseph was looking forward to serving under Frost, but Frost's dynamic was just an overwhelming force in the room and it was triggering things in Olsen that he had thought he had long since put away and forgotten about.

He took another breath and let it out slowly as he settled himself. It took a long moment before he turned and headed down the corridor.

\---------------

Olsen had his attention firmly fixed to the data pad in his hands and didn't see the appreciative looks he was getting from a group of burly BDU-wearing men at the other end of the corridor. In fact, he probably wouldn't have noticed even if his nose hadn't been in the data pad, he just wasn't interested in that kind of attention, it no longer had any place in his life.

But today he was busy regardless, and because of that, he didn't notice the intense flash of interest that filled the eyes of one of those burly men in particular.

\---------------

Olsen was busy checking crates of parts against the manifest on his data pad when he heard boots behind him. He turned and immediately straightened his posture upon seeing General O'Neill standing there.

"General, sir."

"Olsen. Getting everything packed up for transport?" Jack asked with little grin.

"Yes, sir. Everything is going smoothly. I'm just waiting on one final crate of parts that will be here in the morning."

"Excellent," Jack replied, then teased, "You do realize Siler will probably never forgive either of us for you shipping off to Pegasus?"

Olsen chuckled; he had worked under Siler a long time and had learned a lot from him. "You're probably right, sir."

Jack glanced around the room to be sure they were alone before turning back to Joseph with a more serious look on his face. "Small talk aside, I came down here for a reason."

"Sir?"

"You earned your promotion by working hard and keeping your nose clean and you've more than earned your place on this mission. Pegasus is a good opportunity for you. It can be a fresh start, to be cliche'."

"Yes, sir."

"Look, what I mean is, you deserve to be happy. And you deserve to be safe and protected. I won't be there to look out for you like I have here, but Colonel Sheppard and Major Lorne are good men. So is the Master Chief. If you have any issues, and I mean _any_ issues, you bring it to one of them. That's an order."

"Sir, you know I don't..." Olsen started before Jack cut him off.

"I know you don't currently, and that's fine. I just want to you know that you will have people out there in Atlantis to go to if you need them."

"Does Colonel Sheppard know... about me?"

"Yes, as does Major Lorne. I met with both of them and told them personally. They needed to know the reasoning behind the restrictions I put on your file."

"And they still want me on the mission, sir?"

"They wouldn't have it any other way and they both wanted me to stress that you can go to either of them at any time."

Olsen swallowed hard. Having someone other than the General that he could turn to on a daily basis was a little overwhelming.

"Thank you, sir... for everything."

"No thanks necessary. Like I said, you deserve to be protected. But don't forget, you also deserve to be happy, so if you meet someone out there..."

Jack trailed off at the wince on the younger man's face and he softened his tone. "Joey, they're not all like Borden. There are a lot of good, caring Doms out there that will respect you and your limits. Don't let your fear block a chance at something good and of being happy."

The corners of Olsen's mouth curled up a little on their own, O'Neill was one of the few that called him Joey. He replied, "I'll try, sir."

"Good," Jack said and extended his hand. "I don't know if I'll get a chance to see you before you leave, so good luck out there,"

Joey looked at that extended hand for a moment before gamely shaking it. The General wasn't normally one for touching submissives outside of his own, but Joey knew that O'Neill thought himself to be a sort of surrogate father to him and that in both their minds their contact was paternal and nothing more.

\---------------

The schedule for the Atlantis personnel on board the _Daedalus_ was designed to keep people occupied and out of trouble. Joey put on his workout clothes and headed for the cargo bay being used for his assigned PT. He was trying to be inconspicuous among the group of military personnel assembling and he avoided making even casual eye contact to not give off the impression that he was available to approach for play.

A loud booming voice from the back of the group called out, "Fall in, people."

It was a strong and confident voice, used to being instantly obeyed, and Joey had to tamp down the flickers of _want_ that it triggered in him.

Those flickers stayed tamped down just long enough for the owner of the voice to make his way to the front of the group in formation. Then they went from mere flickers to full-on flares as Joey got a good look at the man.

He was tall and built like a tank. The black t-shirt he was wearing fit him like a second skin and accentuated his broad shoulders and powerful arms. His brush cut hair was dark, as were his eyes, and he was deeply tanned.

Joey almost couldn't help himself from flat-out staring, the man was gorgeous.

That was not the consensus of those gathered however, and there was a little wave of twittering among those looking at him

"My name is Lieutenant Commander Carmine Picone and I am a U.S. Navy SEAL. I've been assigned the task of getting all of you up to a higher level of physical training and self-defense by the time we reach Atlantis. Now I know you've all had at least the basics in hand-to-hand and self-defense, but here's the deal folks, we are going into a war-zone where there are life-sucking aliens that want to _eat_ each and every one of us. I shouldn't have to say that being at your best physically and being able to defend yourself are really in your own best interests. My goal is to make sure that your previous training is fresh in your head and teach you some new techniques that just might save your ass in Pegasus."

The group was listening intently, and most of the group was obviously trying not to stare at Commander Picone. Joey was trying hard not to appear to stare but he couldn't help it, the good Commander was pushing every one of his subby buttons. What Joey realized as he caught glimpses out of the corner of his eye was that the Picone was really making many of them uncomfortable and why exactly wasn't registering with Joey. At least, it didn't until he continued speaking.

"I can see that I'm making some of you uncomfortable. Well listen up, people, because I'm only going to explain this once."

He pointed to the left side of his face, the side of his face that looked like it had been made of wax and melted, the side of his face that was disfigured and distorted by burn scars. Joey sucked in a breath, the Commander's scars hadn't registered with him, he had just looked right past them like they weren't even there, but now that the Commander had pointed them out, he couldn't un-see them.

"This," Picone said, continuing to point at his ruined face, "was courtesy of an op in the Middle East that I can't talk about because it's classified. No, it doesn't hurt. Yes, I can see just fine outta that eye. And yeah, the scars go all the way down and around. I think that about covers that. Let's get to work. You've got two minutes to stretch then you're mine."

Joey looked down at the mat in front of him and concentrated on stretching. He was on the ground working his right hamstring when he happened to glance back over to Picone. He found himself the subject of Picone's unabashed and appreciative stare.

Joey quickly averted his eyes even as the blush that started on his cheeks quickly traveled down his ears. He was mortified but forced himself to go back to concentrating on his stretching. When he heard Picone's knowing chuckle, Joey desperately wished for a hole in the floor to open up and swallow him whole.

\---------------

The workout had been strenuous and the hot water felt good beating on his overworked muscles as Joey showered. The shower stall in the quarters he was assigned was miniscule but functional, and most importantly, private. He lathered up a washcloth and scrubbed himself efficiently, when he reached his groin his mind flashed to an image of Picone and he felt the first twinges of arousal. He sighed heavily and looked down at his cock and asked it aloud, "Now? Seriously?"

Deciding to give into his cock's will, he lathered his hand with more soap and closed his eyes, allowing a slide show of the morning's workout to play behind his eyelids as he stroked himself slowly. As he came softly with the fantasy of what it might be like to have Picone's hands on him, he almost wanted to cry, and as he rinsed away the soap and semen he wondered sadly how things might have been with Picone if he had met him before Major Borden had ruined his life.

With a final sigh, Joey shucked off all of those thoughts as he got dressed. He had long since come to terms with what his life was, and for the most part it was good; lonely by his own choice, but good none the less.

Once dressed, he decided he was hungry, and after grabbing a backpack full of textbooks, he headed for the mess.

\---------------

Carmine Picone was not a hesitant man. His self-confidence had served him well as a SEAL, an officer, and in his dynamic, or at least it had before that damn op had turned him into something that looked like a monster from a bad horror movie. So as he held his tray and his eyes fell to the spot where he wanted to sit, he wouldn't say he hesitated, but he did pause for a moment to consider his actions, and steel himself for the inevitable rejection he knew he was about to receive. After letting out a little breath, he walked over to a particular table, and in a friendly tone asked the man with his attention buried in a textbook, "Mind if I join you?"

The submissive looked up at the question and blinked, his mind still obviously on the textbook he had been reading. It took him a moment to register who was standing there and he flushed and stammered out, "With me, sir?"

If Carmine was reading the other man right, and he was generally pretty good about knowing when someone was repulsed or not by his appearance, then there was definitely more than a faint spark of interest on the other man's part. His natural self-confidence asserted itself and he teased playfully, "You're the only one at this table."

When the other man didn't reply or indicate that he would or wouldn't mind the company, Carmine took the initiative and sat down anyway. He extended his hand across the table. "Lieutenant Commander Carmine Picone, but then you knew that since I had you in PT earlier."

The flush that started on sub's cheeks did exactly what it had done earlier in PT. As Carmine watched the other man's neck turn red, he decided that it was the most charming, unconscious thing he had ever seen a sub do in his presence. His ego puffed a little as he noted that he had done it not once but twice now to the man.

The blushing submissive hesitantly took Carmine's hand and cleared his throat nervously before saying, "Master Sergeant Joseph Olsen, Air Force."

There was a current that passed between their hands that had both men looking at them; the contact was simply electric. They reluctantly broke the handshake, their eyes meeting briefly before Joey's flush deepened and he looked down.

Carmine relaxed back a bit in his chair. Picking up his fork, he asked lightly, "So what are you studying?"

Trying to keep his voice from cracking with nerves, Joey answered, "Probability and statistics, sir. It's one of the last classes I need for my degree."

"Cool. What type of degree are you going for?" Carmine replied as he casually cut up the chicken on his plate, purposely keeping his tone light and jovial. He could see that he made the other man a little nervous. Carmine wasn't quite sure if it was his dynamic, rank, or appearance doing it, so he toned everything down a little.

"I need three classes to finish up my Bachelor's then I'm hoping I'll get accepted into the Master's program for mechanical engineering."

"Nice. You must be a pretty smart guy to do this on your own."

Joey's flush was back in force at the unexpected compliment, and his eyes were on his plate as he replied, "I do my best, sir."

Carmine just couldn't help himself, he had to tease. "Do you blush like that all time?"

With his eyes still on his plate, Joey said lowly, "I'm sorry, sir, it doesn't happen all the time, but when it does, I... well I can't control it"

Under the table Carmine nudged the toe of Joey's boot with his own, making Joey finally look up and with a bite of chicken on his fork lifted to his mouth he replied, "It's a good look for you, Joey. I like it."

Before Joey could stammer out a reply to either the remark or the fact that he so familiarly called him Joey, a page over his radio called him to Colonel Caldwell's office.

Joey tapped his radio and acknowledged the page, then stood quickly and said as he began stuffing his study materials in his knapsack, "I'm sorry, sir, I have to go, Colonel Caldwell wants to see me in his office."

Carmine's brow furrowed. "Everything all right? You're not in trouble are you?" Enlisted men getting called to a colonel's office was generally not a good thing.

Carmine wasn't exactly sure what he would have done if the other man had said yes. They weren't socially contracted, nor did Joey wear his collar, but he'd be damned if anyone was ever going to take a strap to Joey's ass if he had anything to say about it. Never had a sub tripped so many of his triggers in such a sort time, and the intensity of it was wholly unexpected.

Joey was surprised at the concern on Carmine's face and in his voice. It had been a really long time since anyone new had cared about him like that, since he had let anyone new care about him like that. He swallowed softly and replied, "No, I'm not in trouble, but thanks for your concern. Colonel Caldwell is an old friend and we just haven't had a chance to catch up since I beamed aboard. That's all."

Carmine nodded and as Joey hefted his knapsack up to his shoulder he asked, "Before you go, would you like to get together sometime? See how our dynamics mesh?"

Joey paused and looked Carmine directly in the eyes, every fiber of his body screaming out that it was on board with that idea. But his brain forced the same words of reason out of his mouth that fell from his lips at every Dom's offer, "I'm very flattered by your interest, sir, but I'm not entertaining socially at this time."

Carmine nodded again, and replied simply, "Okay," he paused momentarily, then added, "You'd better go, don't keep the Colonel waiting."

As Joey made his way towards Caldwell's office he could still see the momentary flash of pain that his rejection had caused Picone. He had covered it quickly enough, but Joey had caught it nonetheless. Joey thought about the words he had used; he had overheard Dr. Kusanagi use them once a couple of years ago and he had thought them as elegant as she was. He had thought the phrase to be a kind and genteel way to push off an interested Dom. He had used it many times in the past without a shred of guilt, but for some reason today it felt cold and biting. It made Joey wish that he could explain to Picone that his rejection had nothing to do him in reality, but rather with demons from Joey's own past. As he reached Caldwell's office he decided that at this point it was probably better to just let the situation lie and let Picone find a sub that would be able to meet his needs.

Joey paused in the open door to Caldwell's office and smiled at seeing Caldwell busy at his laptop, concentrating on his ever-familiar two-finger typing. He cleared his throat to announce himself and when Caldwell looked up he said, "Reporting as requested, sir."

"I was starting to think you were ignoring me, Sergeant." Caldwell teased with a smirk as he stood and crossed the room.

Caldwell stopped directly in front of Joey with wide open arms, and with no hesitation Joey stepped into the offered embrace. As he let Caldwell wrap his arms around him, Joey said, "No, sir. I just figured you had to have been too busy for social calls, Colonel."

Caldwell gave Joey an extra squeeze and said, "I've missed you, Joey."

Joey swallowed hard past the lump in his throat. "I've missed you, too, Steven. So much."

Steven pulled back and pressed a gentle kiss to Joey's forehead before tucking a finger under Joey's chin to make him meet his eyes and admonishing, "For the record, I am _never_ too busy for you. Got that?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good," Steven replied and pulled back, putting a respectable amount of space between them, "I'd like to have dinner with you tomorrow night in my quarters if you don't already have plans. I might even let you beat me at backgammon."

Joey knew that Steven was offering exactly that, dinner and friendship, nothing more, but an unbidden an image of Picone flashed in Joey's mind before he quickly pushed it off. "I would like that, sir, we have a lot to catch up on."

"Good. Tomorrow night then, say nineteen hundred?"

"Nineteen hundred."

\---------------

Carmine was finishing up his dinner at the now empty table, the mess hall getting more and more crowded even as his table stayed empty. He knew that most people didn't have a fucking clue how to approach him, and that stung. He had always considered himself a friendly and outgoing sort and he missed being able to interact with people in that easygoing way. He hoped that the smaller size of the Atlantis expedition would allow people to get to know him and maybe even see past the scars to the man he was underneath.

He was somewhat surprised when a tray was plunked down next to his and a man in a _Daedalus_ jumpsuit sat down. At Carmine's raised eyebrow the man introduced himself.

"Major Kenneth Victor. Flight Commander for the _Daedalus_ X-302 squadron."

"Lieutenant Commander Carmine Picone, Navy SEAL assigned to Atlantis."

"Look, I saw you sitting with Olsen a little while ago and thought I'd give you some friendly advice."

"Are you saying that I need advice on how to deal with a with an enlisted man? Or just submissives in general?"

Carmine knew that he was being abrasive and sarcastic. It was not lost on Victor, but the man had a sort of smug, self-important attitude that was just screaming that he needed his ass kicked. Carmine found it difficult to stay around him without doing so.

"Just that one in particular. Back at the SGC General O'Neill had Olsen under his "personal" protection, and from what I hear, gladly spanked the ass of _anyone_ that so much as looked at Olsen or hassled him." The air quotes that the Major used irritated Carmine even more.

"There's a big difference, Major, between having a conversation with a submissive and hassling them."

"I know that, and you know that, but I like I said I just want to give you a heads up, Olsen can be trouble for any interested Dom. General O'Neill might have just spanked a few asses, but I can guaran-fucking-tee that if anyone messes with Olsen while on board this ship that Caldwell will just go ballistic."

"Who is he to them? Why the concern?" Carmine asked coolly.

"I don't know the reasoning behind O'Neill exactly, but I know that Olsen wore Caldwell's collar for a year and half back when Caldwell was a new Lieutenant Colonel and that they are still very close."

"Understandable if they parted amicably." Carmine was getting increasingly uncomfortable, he had never been a big fan of base gossip, especially as it pertained to Doms talking about subs.

"Yeah, I guess. Most people think that Olsen still hits his knees for the Colonel, just for old times sake," he laughed coarsely then added, "Not that any of us can blame the Colonel, I mean who _wouldn't_ want to fuck that?"

Carmine was about a hair's breadth away from decking the Major. He knew his career could take the hit, his service record was impeccable. He also knew that there was absolutely no doubt that he could take the Major in a brawl, but it wasn't the best way to start a new posting. Brawling was not normally his preferred method of conflict resolution if at all avoidable, so he avoided, at least as viewed from the outside.

Making a show of balling up his napkin and dropping it on his tray he casually stood to go. Stepping around the table to face Victor he leaned in and with a little jerk of his head towards his left arm, said in a low voice for Victor's ears alone, "With all due respect, _Major_ , I know my two master markings look like a blurry Rorschach test, but they're there. So that being said, I shouldn't have to tell you that one of the most important lessons drilled into me by _both_ of my pleasure masters was the idea of respect and discretion. I find it insulting and extremely disturbing that a ranking officer such as yourself would sit and gossip with someone he doesn't even know about his commanding officer and an enlisted submissive. I really hope that your manners are not the norm around here. _Major_."

Carmine could see that the other man wanted to throw a punch, but didn't. Carmine didn't give him a chance to reply; he picked up his tray and left.

\---------------

PT was just as grueling the next day as it had been the first. Carmine drove them hard and there was more than one muttered complaint of "sadist" overheard in the room. Carmine grinned evilly every time he heard it and Joey had to struggle not to laugh.

Joey kept himself in good shape, he wasn't overly muscular, but was lean and much more physically fit than many others in the room. The exercise felt good after sitting around in briefings and meetings. Joey had relaxed into the workout once he realized that there wasn't any negative tension directed towards him from Picone, something Joey had experienced from more than one brushed-off Dom. In fact, it almost seemed the opposite, Picone would meet his eyes periodically and even occasionally share a playful eye roll as another one of the group ran for the prudently placed puke buckets near the wall. Picone seemed to have a sense of humor and didn't hesitate to crack a joke or laugh or smile.

Joey found himself attracted to him as a person, not just sexually or dynamically, although those particular attractions were also rearing their heads. As he huffed his way through the umpteenth set of jumping jacks Picone had set the group to doing, Joey thought back to his altogether too-short conversation with the Commander the day before and found himself regretting that it had been interrupted. He wondered what Picone's interests were and what pleasure house he had attended, and where he was from and what his family was like. Joey realized with a start that he wanted to _know_ the man, really get to know him, and that hadn't happened to him with anyone since Borden.

Those thoughts stuck with Joey through the rest of the afternoon. He wondered why it didn't terrify him like it probably should have, but as he showered and got ready for his dinner date with Steven, he decided not to over-analyze it.

\---------------

Carmine was heading for the mess after sitting through a long, but informative briefing with Major Lorne and Colonel Sheppard. He knew that the two men were not exaggerating the situations that they had faced in the Pegasus galaxy, but Carmine couldn't help but wonder if there was a way for them to prevent the potential of what seemed liked every moment of every day going pear-shaped. The tactical part of Carmine's mind was processing that over and over, just as every other man who had sat in on the briefing was doing, and now after lingering in the briefing room for a long while after everyone else had left, he was lost in his thoughts as he walked.

He was so preoccupied that he almost walked directly into Joey but managed to pull himself up short of physical contact.

"Sorry. My brain's still back in the briefing room," he offered with a grin.

He took in the sight of Joey dressed casually in a pair of jeans and loafers and a neatly tucked in white button-up shirt. Carmine had seen Joey sweaty in workout clothes and he had seen him in his BDUs, but this was altogether different. He was beautiful, and it made Carmine's libido sit up and take notice.

Joey's cheeks flushed but he replied without hesitation. "If your briefings are anything like the ones I've been sitting in, I can totally understand that, sir."

Carmine was pleased that Joey felt comfortable enough to speak with him. He hadn't been overly subtle in his efforts to connect with Joey during PT and he had worried a bit that he had pushed it too far. Apparently he hadn't.

"Yeah, it's been intense. But anyway... so you look nice."

As he knew it would, Carmine watched the other man's neck turn scarlet at the compliment. He had a sudden mental image of a blindfolded Joey against a wall with his hands bound above his head wearing just that white shirt, half unbuttoned, with his hard cock peeking out between the shirt tails, just begging for Carmine's attention. It took every ounce of his personal self-control to force his body to not react to that little fantasy.

Joey nervously shifted the small flat box he was carrying in his hands. "Thank you, sir." He hesitated a moment before adding, "I'm having dinner with Colonel Caldwell. He was my first CO when I joined the Air Force and we've known each other a long time. We try to catch up when we can."

The openness in Joey's sharing surprised Carmine, it seemed important to Joey that Carmine not have any misunderstanding about his relationship with Colonel Caldwell. He did note that he hadn't mentioned wearing Caldwell's collar, and wasn't sure what that meant exactly. He felt a twinge of jealousy at the idea of Joey attending Caldwell, either in the past or present, but he tamped it down. Joey wasn't his, and he suspected that acting like an overbearing caveman wasn't going to win him any points.

"It's nice that you've kept in contact through the years, not everyone does."

"Yeah, it can be hard with different deployments, but we try to catch dinner here and there when we're able." Carmine nodded, and Joey looked quickly at his watch. "I'm sorry, sir, I really need to go so I'm not late."

Carmine forced a smile and said, "You'd better get going then, have fun."

"Thank you, sir."

Joey took a few steps down the corridor and paused, he turned around and said softly, "It is just dinner, sir, nothing else."

"You don't owe me an explanation."

"I know that, sir, but I just... I just wanted you to know that."

Carmine nodded, and replied gently, "Go on, don't be late."

Joey quickly headed off and Carmine watched him go, and as he turned to go to the mess he absently scratched one of the scars on his ribs. They had been dry and itchy since boarding the _Daedalus_ and he made a mental note to stop by the infirmary for something to ease the annoying itch.

As he walked, Carmine was trying to decipher the mixed signals that Joey was giving him. On the one hand, Joey obviously seemed physically attracted to him and open to friendly overtures, but on the other hand, he had shot Carmine down flat at his offer to play. There had to be something else going on with Joey, something that had nothing to do with him. Carmine just wondered what it was.

In the meantime, he was hungry, itchy, and thanks to that unsolicited little white-shirt fantasy, he was horny. His normally jovial expression was replaced by that of a grumpy bear and a wide path was cleared for him in the mess hall.

\---------------

At the permission to enter, Joey opened the door to Steven's quarters. The lights were dimmed a little, not enough to be construed as seductive or intimate, but just enough to make the utilitarian quarters seem a little more home-like with its hard edges softened.

Steven was also dressed casually in khaki pants and loafers and a navy blue sweater. He smiled upon seeing Joey and crossed the room to greet him. The welcome embrace was the same as it had been the day before, but this time the kiss was placed gently on Joey's mouth. Joey trembled in spite of himself as his lips parted and his tongue greeted Steven's.

They savored that kiss for a long moment. When they broke from it, Steven rested his forehead against Joey's and with a little sigh, said, "Sorry, I just couldn't resist."

Joey reached up and gently stroked Steven's cheek. "I always forget how intense that is."

He could feel Steven's arousal growing against him and knew that if he slid to his knees and took that hardening cock into his mouth that Steven wouldn't say no, but that wasn't who they were to each other any longer and they both knew it.

Steven pressed a quick kiss to Joey's temple and stepped back. "C'mon I've got a great bottle of wine from that wine club you talked me into joining and dinner will be here in a few minutes."

They settled themselves on the small couch with their wine glasses and Joey took the opportunity to give Steven the box that he had been carrying around.

Steven tore off the plain red paper covering the box with a wondering look on his face. A look that soon turned to amusement when the gift was revealed to be a box of maple sugar candy.

Steven chuckled, and Joey explained, "I ordered that on the Internet and had it overnighted just before we left Earth."

"I still can't believe that out of everything about that trip, you remember this," Steven replied.

"I remember _everything_ about that trip, it was the best two weeks of my life," Joey answered honestly.

They had been playing exclusively for about two months when Steven had surprised Joey with a ski trip to Vermont. They spent the first couple of days skiing and exploring the little shops and oddities in the surrounding towns, just relaxing into their vacation. On the third night, Joey had knelt on a deep, plush carpet in front of a roaring fire wearing nothing but a leather cock ring and matching leather cuffs as he bowed his neck to accept Steven's collar.

It was on that trip that Steven had discovered that he enjoyed the syrupy sweet maple sugar candy and through the years since, Joey enjoyed finding excuses to either send or bring Steven the sentimental treat.

Like Joey knew that he would, Steven smirked at him and reached over and ruffled his hair, just like eight years hadn't passed from that Vermont trip until now.

\---------------

In the mess hall Carmine joined his fellow SEAL and teammate, Chief Petty Officer Ramon Gutierrez, and Ramon's collared submissive Adrian Picone, Carmine's first cousin. His favorite cousin if Adrian were to be believed.

It was Adrian that teased Carmine upon seeing his sour expression. "Uh, oh, _somebody_ needs to get laid."

Carmine leveled a look of annoyance across the table at the comment and then groaned to Ramon. "You know when I brought you home to spend Christmas with my family it never even occurred to me that you would collar my most annoying cousin, never mind marry him and drag him along with us wherever we go."

Ramon held up his hands in mock surrender, he knew that Carmine was actually kidding, no matter how grumpy his words sounded. "Hey, man, you _saw_ the jeans _mi amor_ was wearing when I met him. How could I say no to that?"

Adrian was looking intently at Carmine across the table and dropped the joking around. "You alright, Carm?"

Carmine took a big swig of milk and nodded before picking up his fork to attack his mashed potatoes. "Yeah, just a lot going on in my head with this mission."

Ramon blew out a breath. "That was one hell of a briefing this afternoon, man, and we seriously need to come up with some way to take out the Wraith. Every last one of those fuckers, preferably."

A passing Marine gave Ramon a thumbs up and added his own. "Hoorah, sir."

The three of them grinned at the Marine and both Ramon and Adrian openly admired the Marine's fine-looking ass as he walked away. They ate quietly for a few minutes, but Adrian hadn't given up studying Carmine and he prodded, "The Wraith problem isn't the only thing going on in your head though is it?"

Carmine shrugged and turned his attention outward to the rest of the mess hall. "It's just... I met someone that's got me a little turned around."

Ramon gestured with his empty fork in Carmine's direction and asked, "Is this someone going to be stationed on Atlantis with us?"

"Yeah, he's Air Force."

"Ha!" Ramon exclaimed. "It's a he. So, man, why are you here with us instead of in your quarters getting better acquainted with him?"

"It's complicated. Yesterday I offered and he declined, but then we just had weird conversation a little while ago that I'm trying to wrap my head around."

"Do you think it's because of your scars?" Ramon asked gently, being one of a scant handful of people who could ask that question and still retain teeth.

Carmine shook his head and said, "No, that's not it. I can tell when that's a problem with someone, and it just isn't with him, it's like he doesn't even see them. No, there's something else, something that I don't think is about me at all."

"Maybe he left someone behind to come on this mission, or had a recent breakup or something. If he's going to Atlantis with us, maybe the best thing to do is just give him some time if you're really interested in him," Adrian offered..

Carmine thought about that for a moment and replied, "I hadn't even considered that, you might be onto something there."

Adrian grinned at him and went back to teasing, "Of course I still think you need to get laid."

Carmine grinned back and retorted, "And I still think you need your ass spanked."

Ramon looked at his sub, his gaze lustful and appreciative, and with a little leer said, "Yes, he does. And I have the perfect paddle to do it, too."

"Get a room," Carmine admonished with a playful roll of his eyes as he stood up.

\---------------

Dinner had been the same fare being served in the mess hall, both Steven and Joey were simple eaters and didn't require anything fancy. The California wine was excellent though, and the conversation relaxed and familiar. Over dinner they talked about mutual acquaintances and Steven's family, and about Joey's school work and his promotion and new deployment to Atlantis. Joey couldn't remember having such a relaxing evening in a very long time.

They were settled back on the couch each with a snifter of brandy when Steven broached the elephant that was always in the room.

"So, have you been seeing anyone?"

Another unbidden flash of Commander Picone's face brought Joey up short and he made a show of swirling his brandy around in his glass without answering Steven.

"Joey, that _was_ in the form of a question."

Joey took a sip of brandy and let it slide slowly down his throat before answering simply, "No."

Steven's expression became one of sadness and concern. "Joey..."

"It doesn't matter, Steven. That's just not part of who I am anymore. It doesn't bother me, I've got a lot of other stuff to keep me occupied instead."

"If it doesn't bother you, then why did you hesitate to answer?" Steven challenged.

Joey grinned wanly, "Because I knew how you'd react."

Steven stood up and paced. "Yeah, I guess you would. And you probably know what I'm going to say next."

"That I can't let what Borden did to me dictate the rest of my life and that not all Doms are like him."

"Exactly," Steven replied evenly.

"I know all that intellectually, but I'm just... I'm just not ready to take that chance emotionally."

Steven had stopped pacing in front of the narrow bookshelf in the corner and was staring at a small framed picture of he and Joey on skis at the bottom of that mountain in Vermont. They had both been so happy on that trip, high on fresh air and sexual energy, their wide smiles in the picture a testament to that. But it hadn't lasted, their dynamics hadn't clicked well enough to become permanent, they each needed things the other just couldn't give. The genuine affection and love between them never waned though. Steven even kept Joey's collars and the wedding rings they had mutually decided were a bad idea tucked in among his clothing in the dresser across the room.

Joey set his brandy down and silently crossed the room. He stepped up behind Steven and slipped his arms around the other man, pressing his cheek against Steven's shoulder. His voice wasn't at all hesitant as he whispered, "It wasn't your fault, you know."

"I introduced you to him. How is it not my fault?"

"No one knew what he was capable of, Steven. His actions were his own and he's the only one to blame."

They stood that way for a long time, relishing the contact. Steven's voice was low as he broke the quiet moment. "I want you to promise me something."

"What?" Joey asked tucking his chin in the crook of Steven's shoulder.

"I want you to promise me that if you find someone who makes you smile like that again," he pointed to the photo in front of them, "that you'll give him a chance."

Joey turned and pressed his cheek to Steven's shoulder-blade and whispered, "I promise to try."

\---------------

Carmine's trip to the infirmary got him a quick prescription for the strongest Tollan creme available to combat his dry, itchy scars. The doctor citing the difference in the humidity level on board the _Daedalus_ as a possible suspect, as was the way the water was treated versus back on Earth.

He took the tube from the doctor on duty and asked a little sheepishly, "Is there anyone that can help put it on my back? I can't reach all the scars back there."

One of the nurses over heard and stepped over to them and shyly offered to assist Carmine. He had observed her working in the infirmary while he was waiting for his turn to see the doctor. She was tall woman with her long dark blond hair pulled back into a severe looking bun. She was athletic in appearance, not a willowy sort, with wide hips and probably ten or fifteen extra pounds that plagued her. Her skin was fair though, and her eyes a light blueish hazel, and he thought to himself that she would be much prettier with her hair down and a far less serious expression on her face.

She efficiently pulled the curtain around them and as he pulled off his t-shirt he said, "Thanks, I appreciate this."

A little nervously she replied, "There's nothing worse than an itch on your back you can't reach, sir, but the creme should take care of that nicely for you."

Her touch on his back wasn't nervous or hesitant and her sure fingers worked the creme into each ropy scar.

He had to work to keep himself from moaning in delight, he hadn't realized exactly how itchy he had been until it was relieved by the creme.

As she worked he tried to make conversation. "My name's Carmine, by the way, Lieutenant Commander Carmine Picone, US Navy SEAL heading for Atlantis. What's yours?"

"Lieutenant Anne Katherine Erickson, but my friends and family call me Anka."

She found one particularly bad spot and he let out a little groan in spite of himself and then he laughed when she chided, "You should have come in sooner, sir."

Anka finished up and he put his t-shirt back on and turned to go. "Thanks again, Anka. And it was nice meeting you."

He got a little nervous smile out of her as she replied, "You too, sir."

It confirmed Carmine's thought that she would be much prettier if she smiled more.

An hour later, he was in his quarters stretched out on his bed intently studying field reports from past Atlantis off-world teams when his door chimed.

He opened it to see Anka standing there with something in her hands.

"Lieutenant?"

She swallowed nervously and held out what turned out to be a bar of moisturizing soap of all things. "My brother uses this, he says it keeps his scars from drying out and making him itchy."

"Your brother?" Carmine asked, intrigued. He had wondered why she hadn't shied away from him in the infirmary.

"He was injured in Afghanistan by an IED, he has injuries about as severe as yours, although his are mostly on his legs."

"Is that why you volunteered to help me in the infirmary?"

"No, sir," she said quickly, then dropped her eyes to the floor, "It was a way... I mean I... I just wanted your attention, sir. I'm sorry if I offended you. I'll just go, sir."

She turned to go and in a flash he closed his fingers lightly around her wrist. "Wait, Anka." She paused and when she turned back towards him, he continued, "I'm not offended. And you can have all of my attention tonight if you want it."

"I would like very much to please you, sir."

"Come inside, Anka, and we can talk about how we can please each _other_ tonight."

\---------------

One game of backgammon turned into two and then three, neither Joey or Steven really wanting their evening to end. Joey was taken back to another time and place. Back when their evening would have ended in bed with Joey bound and hard and begging and Steven fucking him like he had all the time in the world.

Joey's eyes flicked over to the bed and the toy box in the corner. Steven caught him and teased, "If you're thinking that you'd like me strip off all your clothes and have my way with you, then I'd have to warn you that if I have one more brandy I probably wouldn't say no if you asked me to."

Joey stood and gently took Steven's face in his hands and kissed him deeply. He pulled back and swallowed hard before saying quietly, "I know, and if I have one more brandy, I just might ask. So I'm going to say goodnight, Steven."

Steven's hand landed warmly on Joey's neck. He nodded and said, "Remember what I said, if you meet someone, give 'em a chance. You deserve it."

It was Joey's turn to nod and he pressed another, more chaste, goodnight kiss on Steven's mouth before turning and heading back to his own quarters.

\---------------

Anka knelt at Carmine's request as he circled slowly around her. "What is your safe word?"

"I prefer to use the standard colors, if it pleases you, sir."

"Red for stop, yellow to ease off, green for you're fine with something?"

"Yes, sir."

"Okay," Carmine replied as he divested her bun of the multitude of hairpins holding it in place, finally freeing her hair to fall loosely around her shoulders.

He took his time asking questions as he slowly undressed her. When he had a good handle on what she needed from him he removed his own clothing. His erection was ruddy and leaking with need as he stepped in front of her and gathered her soft hair in his hands and ordered her to suck him.

He only let her have a brief taste though, before ordering her up onto the bed on her hands and knees. He pulled wrist and ankle cuffs out of his kit and efficiently had her bound in place, her ass in the air, ready for him to use.

She had requested his hand, and his hand she got. Firm blows from his bare hand soon had her completely aroused and her ass glowing. Arching and mewing with each blow, she was so wet that it was starting to run down her inner thighs. Carmine's cock was hard and aching to bury itself in her wet heat, so without further ado, he quickly rolled on a condom and did just that. He grabbed a hold of the hips that she was so self-conscious about and with one sure stroke entered her fully. She was tight, and not used to taking a man of his size and her mewing quickly turned to guttural grunts and moans. She fucked him back as much as her bonds would allow, he could tell she was riding the razor's edge of orgasm. He leaned forward and covered her with his body and again wrapped a hand in her hair, tugging and forcing her to arch further and take him even deeper.

His own breathing was ragged and harsh as he commanded her, "Come for me, Anka."

His fingers curled tighter into her hair and the soft flesh of her hip. He felt her tightening even further around his cock and the beginnings of her release. He moved purposely then, drawing it out for her and making it last as long as he could before letting his own release overtake him.

When the last spasms deep inside her had stilled, he slowly pulled out, eliciting one final moan of pleasure from her. Even as he was trying to regain his breath, he deftly undid her bonds and they both flopped bonelessly onto the bed, enjoying the moment of post-orgasmic glow.

Carmine rolled over and leaned up on and elbow and rested his free hand lightly on her stomach and asked, "Do you have to check in with anyone?"

She nodded and licked her lips looking for moisture and managed to reply, "Yes, and he'll want to know if I need to set up a second check, sir."

"I'd like you to stay if you want to."

Her grin was quick and genuine and just lit up her entire face. "I would be honored to stay, sir," she paused then added "I feel comfortable enough that I don't think I need another check in, if that's alright with you, sir."

He grinned back and replied, "That is entirely your call. I'm fine with it either way, I just want you to feel safe."

In the end, she made her check in and told her friend that she was staying but that she didn't need another check in.

They both cleaned up a little and each drained a bottle of water before crashing back to the bed. Anka was a little body shy and Carmine amused himself by running his calloused hand all over her, enjoying watching the goosebumps springing up on her skin. With a wicked grin he soon had her bound spread eagle, every inch of her open and exposed for his hands, his mouth, his cock.

At the moment, it was the first two he employed to make her squirm and gasp. His mouth was hot and wet as he explored all of her curves, even as his fingers were coarse and unrelenting. He whispered things in Italian against her skin, most of which she didn't catch or understand, but _bella_ she understood and it broke her. No one had ever called her beautiful before--in any language.

Carmine heard the hiccupy intake of breath and immediately looked up at Anka's face to check on her. The tears filling her eyes were not exactly what he expected and he asked gently, "Anka, do you want me to stop?"

The tears threatening to fall actually did as she opened her mouth to speak. When nothing came out, and she wouldn't look him in the eye, Carmine sat up and deftly released the clips on her cuffs. He cupped her cheek in his hand and said in that same gentle way, "Anka, please look at me." She forced herself to meet his eyes and he asked, "What's wrong?"

She inhaled deeply and admitted in a small voice, "No one ever said I was beautiful before."

Without hesitation he gathered her in his arm and held her tightly. "You are beautiful, Anka."

She wasn't in a place to respond, and as he held her, his hands gently stroked her back, soothing her as best as he knew how. "When I was eighteen my _Mamma_ insisted that I attend her pleasure house in Italy, _Casa di Bella Nascosta,_ the House of Hidden Beauty. It's a small pleasure house in Tuscany, popular with Italian-American families. Their main house philosophy is that there is beauty in everyone and everything if you know where to look."

He could feel her relaxing and continued his story. "In my first session there was a pair of twins also there for training. Nicky and Antony were their names. They were beautiful, popular young men, you know the type, that captain of the football team and class president type. They were identical twins, but their personalities were night and day. While Nicky was fun and had a great sense of humor, his brother Antony was sort of a shithead."

Carmine grinned at the little giggle that pulled from Anka.

"He was extremely vain and kept telling everyone that he only intended to fuck submissives as beautiful as he was and that he was going to be rich and famous someday. Like I said, total shithead. Anyway, one of our first training exercises was in combination with the first session submissives also at the house. The sub would come into the middle of our training room and stand in the nude on a small pedestal, imitating a marble statue and each Dom in training was to study the sub and list no less than five things that were beautiful about that sub. It all went pretty smoothly until a girl named Sophie entered the room. Sophie was very overweight, and she was so shy that she was almost physically ill at the idea of having to drop her toga in front of the entire room."

Anka's voice was small as she asked, "Did she do it though?"

"Yes. And most of the Doms in the room were gentle and kind with her. Nicky in particular had a long list of things that pleased him about her, he liked that she was modest and that she had freckles on her nose, and a whole bunch of other little things that no one else had noticed about her. Everyone could see he was definitely attracted to her, but then when he was done it was Antony's turn. I did say he was a shithead, right?"

Anka giggled again and answered, "Yes, sir."

"Good. Well needless to say, he was not at all kind to gentle Sophie and after his second sarcastic remark, Nicky stood up and knocked him out cold with one punch. After that, Antony was sent home and not surprising to anyone, Sophie was assigned to Nicky during training."

"He defended her like that?" Anka asked, disbelieving a little.

"Oh, absolutely. In fact, he actually collared Sophie at the end of that session and they married about eight months later. They've been together ever since and have three beautiful little girls and Nicky proudly tells everyone that they look just like their mother. But that's not the best part of the story."

"No?"

"Nope. Best part is that it turned out that Sophie is the only child of a huge international shipping tycoon. Think beyond filthy rich, and Nicky's father-in-law loves him and brought him into the business as an heir-apparent."

"What happened to Antony?"

"From what I hear, he went off to college where he collared and married some beautiful, but bitchy, cheerleader who's now making his life hell. I guess he's working in middle management for some insurance company and has totally let himself go. Karma's a bitch."

Carmine shifted around a little so he could see Anka's face. "Look, I told you that story for a reason. There is beauty in all of us, and if the dumb bastards that you've been with in the past haven't seen that you _are_ beautiful then they didn't deserve to be with you to begin with."

Anka didn't reply, but he could see the understanding in her eyes and he asked lightly, "Do you still want to stay?"

She swallowed hard and said in an exhale, "Very much, sir."

Carmine grinned and in a lightning quick move had flipped them around and with one hand held her hands pressed to the bed above her head as his mouth trailed down her neck to her breast. He paused and teased, "Good, because I wasn't done exploring yet."

"Sir?"

"Mmm?" he replied as his tongue swirled around her nipple.

"Will you tell me my list?"

He drew the nipple he had been tormenting into his mouth and suckled making her squirm. He moved his mouth lower and whispered against her skin, "Your hair is beautiful, and I like that it's long and thick for my hands to play with. You should wear it looser during the day so people can see it."

In between nips and licks he gave her whole list. She had never felt so desirable as she did when he finally finished torturing her with his mouth and after pausing only long enough to quickly put on a condom, he slipped his strong hands under her ass and lifted her slightly as he slid inside her in one deep stroke.

\---------------

Anka left his quarters in the morning with barely enough time to go back to her own and change for her shift in the infirmary. He had taken her three times in total and she couldn't remember ever feeling so cherished or sated after a play date.

She showered quickly and got ready for duty. As she stood in front of the mirror with her hair in her hand to put it in her faithful bun, she paused and instead reached for a clip. Arranging it so that it was up and out of the way, but still soft and loose, she smiled thinking about Carmine's list.

\---------------

Carmine had a little time in between briefings and PT and he went looking for someone. He didn't know exactly who the "someone" was, it differed from ship to ship in the Navy, but he knew there had to be a "go to" guy somewhere on board the _Daedalus_. The guy that would have a supply of little gifts or things not necessarily available from the quartermaster.

He found out that the go-to guy on board the _Daedalus_ was a Sergeant David Scalfani down in the armory. Carmine made his way down there and found Scalfani.

Scalfani gave him an odd look when he walked into the armory but Carmine took it in stride, he was used to odd looks.

"Sir?"

"Sergeant, I was told that you're the man to see if I need a gift."

"Are you looking for anything in particular, sir?"

"Just a thank you gift for a female sub that did something nice for me yesterday. Something fun and girly maybe."

"I have some nice silver earrings I picked up in Mexico."

"Sounds good, show me what you've got."

Scalfani went and opened a locked trunk in the corner and pulled out a selection of earrings. Carmine looked them over and picked out a pretty set of dangling butterfly earrings. He could picture them on Anka and he smiled.

Scalfani was studying him again and finally asked, "Sir, have we met before? I feel like we've met but I can't place where."

They compared deployments without success when Carmine asked, "Where did you train?"

"I did two sessions at _Bellezza Nascosta_ , sir."

Carmine grinned. "Me, too. That's got to be it, when did you attend?"

As it turned out, Scalfani was doing his first session when Carmine was doing his second.

"Mystery solved, sir. Do you want to take the earrings with you or do want me to deliver?"

"You do that?" Carmine asked.

"Sure. Gift wrap, too. I'm one stop shopping."

"Works for me."

"Who are they going to, sir?"

"Lieutenant Erickson. She's a nurse in the infirmary."

"Oh yeah, she's one of the new ones, I've only seen her a couple of times, never talked to her," he had pulled out a small pink gift bag and was crinkling up tissue paper in it as he talked, "She's a pretty girl, but she really needs to loosen up just a little. Maybe ditch that bun and smile more."

"Maybe she needs to hear that."

Scalfani added some curling ribbon to the bag's handled and said incredulously, "Even I know better than to tell a woman to loosen up, sir."

Carmine chuckled. "No, I meant that first part."

"What? That's she's pretty? All anyone has to do is look at her to know that."

Carmine shrugged and replied nonchalantly, "Maybe _she_ doesn't know."

\---------------

Later that afternoon Scalfani entered the infirmary with the little gift bag in hand. There was a nurse standing with her back to him that he didn't recognize. He cleared his throat and asked, "Excuse me, I'm looking for Lieutenant Erickson."

Anka turned around at the statement and Scalfani sucked in a breath. The nurse he hadn't recognized was the Lieutenant herself, but she looked completely different. Her hair was piled loosely in a clip and little tendrils were curling around her face and she was wearing light cosmetics that accentuated the soft graceful features of her face. The combined effect made her look ten years younger and she was stunning.

"Yes? I'm Lieutenant Erickson, can I help you?" Anka asked, smiling a little nervously at the extremely handsome Dom in front of her.

"I have a delivery for you from Commander Picone, Lieutenant." He held out the gift bag.

She took it gingerly and replied, "Thank you...?" She trailed off looking at his name tape on his jumpsuit.

"Sergeant David Scalfani, ma'am. I've seen you a couple of times but we haven't actually been introduced. I'm very pleased to meet you, Lieutenant," he replied.

"You, too, Sergeant. Thank you for delivering this."

"You're welcome. I should let you get back to work, ma'am."

Scalfani took a few steps towards the door before pausing and turning around. "Lieutenant?"

"Yes?" she asked with a questioning look on her face.

"Your hair," he gestured with his finger, "It looks nice like that."

Anka dropped her eyes and a pink blush spread across her cheeks much to Scalfani's delight as her hand unconsciously reached up to toy with one of her curls.

Before she could reply he turned back around and left the infirmary only to pause in the corridor before quickly turning on his heel and heading back into the infirmary.

Anka met his eyes as he reentered the room and he asked for everyone to hear, "Lieutenant, would you have dinner with me?"

\---------------

The first few days on board passed quickly thanks to the full schedule everyone had. Joey still saw Carmine in his daily PT, and though they spoke casually, the Dom gave Joey his space and didn't press his interest.

\---------------

Joey wanted to groan. The mess hall was exceptionally busy and he stood there with his tray trying to spot someone he knew with an empty seat with no luck.

\---------------

"Oh, he's cute," Adrian said to the table in general as he saw the gorgeous tawny-haired sub looking around the mess hall.

Ramon looked up from his food and grunted and rolled his eyes at his sub.

"Who are you gawking at now?" Carmine asked and swiveled around in his chair to see Joey standing there looking for all the world like a lost puppy in the crowded mess.

Carmine stood up without hesitation and over the din called out, "Olsen."

\---------------

At the sound of his name, Joey's attention was drawn to Carmine who was gesturing for him to join his table. Joey took a deep breath and made his way over there.

Carmine was sitting with two others, a Dom and his sub by the look of things. The empty chair at the table was next to Carmine and Joey hesitantly put his tray down.

"Master Sergeant Joseph Olsen this is Chief Petty Officer Ramon Gutierrez, a fellow SEAL and a member of my team. And the one across from you that's probably about to say something stupid is Ramon's husband, and my cousin, Adrian Picone."

"Hello," Joey replied shyly.

The shy start not withstanding, the conversation at the table soon took off. Joey found himself readily pulled into the conversation by all three other men. None of them letting him get away with not joining in.

It was Adrian that explained, "You have to understand that Carmine is one of four children, I'm one of five, and Ramon's poor _Mamma_ had seven. We all come from big, noisy families where everyone talks over everyone else. What about you? Any brothers or sisters?"

Joey swallowed lightly before replying, "I don't think so. I mean I don't really know. I got dumped into the foster care system when I was six. I didn't see my mother again and I don't know who my father was, he wasn't listed on my birth certificate."

Carmine's heart broke a little for Joey. His family was crazy at best, and though they argued and fought, he couldn't imagine them not being there. Ramon sensed the unease at the table and in his self-appointed role as diplomat asked, "Is that why you joined the Air Force?"

Joey shot Ramon a grateful look for the conversation segue and replied, "Yeah. I saw too many of the other kids in the system ending up dead or in jail so I made a smarter choice and here I am."

Carmine put some food on his fork and added, "And soon to be an engineer," with a touch of pride, before shoveling in his food.

"What's this now?" Adrian asked.

"I'm working on my degree. I've got three classes left on my bachelor's then I'm hoping to go on for my master's in engineering."

"Good for you, man. I took a few classes long distance, that's hard work," Ramon replied.

"I struggled with a couple of classes, but got through it." Joey turned his attention to Adrian and asked, "What's your field?"

"I'm a general contractor. I've got my plumbing and electrical licenses and I do all the, you know, carpentry, drywall, that kind of thing. Dr. Weir seemed excited to have me coming along, I guess the poor city needs some work."

Joey and Adrian chit-chatted back and forth about the seemingly never-ending list of repairs that the city needed for a few minutes. While the two subs held each other's attention, Ramon met Carmine's eyes, and without a word being said between them, Ramon knew that Joey was the sub that had Carmine so off-kilter.

Ramon liked Joey. Once the sub had realized that neither Carmine or Ramon were going to proposition or pressure him or crush him with their dynamics, he had relaxed and allowed himself to enjoy the company and conversation. There was certainly a wariness about him though that Ramon could sense, although he didn't think it had anything to do with Carmine specifically but rather Doms in general. In fact, Joey seemed to be quite taken by Carmine and it was obvious to anyone watching the two of them that it was mutual.

\---------------

Colonel Caldwell paused in the entryway to the mess hall. It was crowded and having their CO stroll in would just turn it into chaos. He was about to turn and leave when he noticed Joey sitting with three men he didn't know. Two of the men were obviously a pairing, the other man sitting next to Joey was a truly impressive physical specimen of a solider, the horrendous scars on his face not withstanding. Steven watched with interest as the man was telling some story that had Joey and the other two laughing. Joey's body language was relaxed and he appeared to be truly enjoying himself.

Steven turned to go with a wry smile on his face. He wanted nothing more than to see Joey happy and settled with a Dom that cared about him, but it still stung that he himself wouldn't be that Dom.

\---------------

More and more Joey found himself spending time with Carmine, either solo or with Ramon and Adrian. Joey had forgotten how nice it was to have friends, people whose company he truly enjoyed and seemed to enjoy his. The loss of most of his friends due to his pulling away from everyone after Borden was something he regretted and he had decided to make a conscious effort to rectify that in his new posting.

Joey didn't know exactly what to make of Carmine. The attraction between them was certainly still there, but Carmine left it alone completely, never mentioning Joey's rejection or pushing his dynamic on him. They got to know one another casually over coffees and meals, and other times Carmine would just plunk down at the table with his own data tablet when Joey was studying and they would work in companionable silence. And more often than not, Carmine would walk Joey back to his quarters at the end of the day.

Carmine made Joey feel safe and protected--and it absolutely terrified him.

\---------------

Joey was walking back to his quarters, alone, as Carmine was off sparring with the other SEALs. He was hoping to get another chapter's worth of studying done when Steven called his name from the other end of the corridor.

"Hey, what are you up to?" Steven asked.

"Heading back to my quarter's to study for a while. You, sir?"

"Colonel Sheppard just reserved a play room, and I'm heading for an observation room. I'm curious to see him in action."

Joey nodded, his mouth dry at the thought of seeing Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay exhibiting. He hadn't attended their exhibition at the SGC but from what he had heard from others that did, it had been amazing.

Steven chuckled seeing the excitement on Joey's face. "C'mon," he said and headed for the observation room that was always reserved for him as the ship's commander.

\---------------

The sights and sounds coming from the playroom below were a thing to behold. Joey was transfixed watching Doctor McKay submit so completely and without fear or hesitation to Colonel Sheppard. It was beautiful to watch, and humbling.

The light kiss of flogger on skin made Joey fantasize for just the briefest of moments what it would like to be the one bound to the cross with Carmine holding the flogger. His brow furrowed at the thought and he started when Steven's arms slipped under his to embrace him.

Joey relaxed into the familiar embrace and Steven murmured, "They are gorgeous together."

Joey nodded but didn't say anything. Steven knew Joey too well though, and knew that there were some powerful emotions swirling around in that head of his.

He squeezed Joey tighter and said sadly, "You know if I thought for one second that a collar would fix this for you, I'd do it in a heartbeat."

Joey closed his eyes and dropped his chin, the sounds from the playroom making him tense with each blow. His voice was low and broken as he replied, "I know."

When the sounds of the flogger switched to the sounds of cane hitting flesh Joey broke completely. He turned in Steven's arms as the first sob escaped him. It was the first time he had dared let his true emotions out since Borden had ruined his life.

Steven held him tightly through the storm of tears laden with sadness and rage. Steven's embrace was strong and his murmured words of support, gentle. He had long suspected that Joey had never truly dealt with aftermath of Borden's actions, no matter what he said or pulled over on the psych exams, and this was his proof.

Eventually, Joey quieted against him and Steven asked softly, "Better?"

Joey nodded, but added in a whisper, "I'm sorry."

Steven pulled back and cupped Joey's face in his hands. His expression was grave and concerned and he shook his head sadly as he said, "Joey, you know that I love you, and I will _always_ be here for you no matter what. But I have to tell you, you're scaring me right now. You _need_ to deal with what happened before it completely tears you up inside. You can't live like this. You can't just keep bottling up all your needs alongside all your fears, you're going to explode. I want you to get help. I can make it an order if you need me to, but I would rather not do that."

"I just..."

"Just what?" Steven prodded gently.

"I just want to be like I used to be," Joey admitted in a small voice.

"I know. And you can get there again, Joey. But you need to talk to someone who can help you. It's nothing to be ashamed of, and I'll personally kick the ass of anyone that makes you feel that way. I know that somewhere down deep you think somehow that what Borden did was your fault, but it wasn't, Joey. You deserve to find someone who you want and that wants you, someone for you to touch and someone to touch you that turns you on so much you forget your own name. But most of all, Joey, you deserve someone to love, somebody that's going to protect you and cherish and honor the gifts you give them."

More fresh, hot tears streamed down Joey's face, wetting Steven's hands and he sadly replied, "Who'd want me now, Steven?"

Steven's expression softened and he teased halfheartedly, "You mean besides me?"

Joey sniffed hard and pulling away gently from Steven, said, "You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do. And I'm thinking there's someone in particular that has you so twisted up at the moment. Am I right?"

Joey dropped his gaze to the floor and nodded.

"Picone?"

Joey's eyes, wide with questions, quickly met Steven's again and Steven said with a smirk, "Contrary to popular belief, I like to think I have a pretty good handle on what's going on aboard my ship. Has he offered to play?"

Joey's reply was quiet, "Yeah, but I... I turned him down."

"Yet you're still spending a lot of time with him. So, I'm assuming he took your rejection okay."

"He doesn't pressure me."

"Do you feel safe with him?"

"Yes. No. Yes...but that's what worries me, Steven. I feel like I could maybe trust him, like I'd be safe with him, and that's what scares me to death."

"Look, from what I read in his personnel file, he's a good guy, solid, dependable, with nothing but rave reviews from all his superiors and a boatload of medals and commendations up to and including being awarded the Navy Cross. There isn't one iota of anything in his jacket that makes me twitchy about a sub playing with him."

"He doesn't know about me. About what happened."

"Maybe you should tell him."

Joey swallowed hard and his voice wavered a little as he replied, "I can't, I just... I can't."

Joey looked ready to fly apart again and Steven reached over and squeezed his shoulder. "Joey, the man looks at you like you hung the fucking moon. And if he's the type of man _and_ the type of Dom I think he is, none of it is going to matter to him."

Joey nodded sadly in acknowledgment but didn't say anything and they stood there quietly for a moment, the only sound in the room that of Colonel Sheppard repacking his kit down in the playroom. Neither Joey nor Steven had been paying attention to the activities below for a while, and they had missed the big finish.

Steven's voice was low as he offered, "You and Picone are both gonna be stationed on Atlantis, so no one is saying you need to rush into anything with him, and if he's not pressuring you, then taking some time shouldn't be an issue. I think you should stop by the infirmary and have them set you up with one of the counselors on the Atlantis staff to start working through all the stuff in your head. And when you're ready there are good people on Atlantis that _will_ act as a safety net for you. You said that Colonel Sheppard and Major Lorne were both informed of your situation, I can't imagine either of them refusing if you ask them to monitor a play date."

"No, I can't either," Joey admitted, his eyes downcast again.

Steven's hand migrated from Joey's shoulder to rest warmly on the back of Joey's bare neck; it was times like this that Steven's fingers could almost still feel the smooth links of the collar that Joey had worn.

"When was the last time you had any down time?" Steven queried.

Joey shrugged noncommittally in response.

Switching his voice over to the tone that Joey would forever and always obey without hesitation, Steven said, "Go get a kneeling cushion from the cabinet in the corner."

Steven settled himself into the comfortable leather chair near the window to the playroom below and spun it around so he was instead facing the room while Joey fetched the cushion.

In motions so painfully familiar, they soon had themselves situated. Joey was on his knees next to Steven's chair, his head resting on Steven's thigh with Steven's hand gently stroking his head.

\---------------

The next day Joey visited the infirmary.

Joey was visibly uncomfortable and the doctor on duty quickly found them a private area to talk. Joey stammered out his request for counseling and the doctor listened compassionately, knowing how incredibly difficult it must have been for the man to get the request out. Joey hadn't come right out and said that he had been the victim of a sexual assault, but the doctor was able to read between the lines.

"I will arrange something for you, Sergeant, with the strictest of confidentiality. We have two new psychologists on board that will be assigned to Atlantis, let me speak with them and find out which of them will better suit your needs."

"Thank you, Doctor."

Later on, the doctor pulled up Joey's medical file to find out more about the assault only to find that Joey's traveling medical record had been heavily redacted under order of General O'Neill. The details of what had happened to Olsen were a mystery.

\---------------

Ramon and Carmine and a couple other guys were playing basketball on the small half-court tucked away in one of the recreation areas when a small group of five _Daedalus_ personnel came in laughing and griping to each other.

"Four times he made me redo that damn report. Four fucking times," one of them said.

"Yeah, he's definitely been in a bad mood the past few days. I think he needs to get laid," replied another.

"Or maybe go to the infirmary for some little blue pills," offered a third, and received a high-five from one of the others.

"What's this now?" asked the first man.

"You didn't hear?"

"Hear what?"

"Scuttlebutt's got it that the other night when Sheppard was in the playroom that Caldwell watched from his observation room with that sub that used to wear his collar and that they were in there for a couple hours after Sheppard and McKay left the playroom."  
  
"So?"

"Scuttlebutt's also got it that when they left Caldwell looked stressed-out and that there wasn't anything out of place in the observation room. No used condoms or opened packets of lube and none of the toys in the cabinet had their sanitation seals broken."

"So what are you saying? He couldn't get it up?"

"Either that or the hot little piece of ass he was in there with is really just useless."

Ramon heard the entire exchange the same as Carmine and saw the rage about to explode out of the big Italian. Carmine stomped over towards the five with Ramon a step behind him muttering, "Well, there's only five. And they're Air Force. I guess it's better odds than us against those eight Marines I picked a fight with in San Diego last year."

The sight of a livid mountain of a man descending upon them shut up all five when Carmine bellowed, "Does everyone on this fucking ship think it's appropriate to discuss their commanding officer's private business?"

No one said a word until one particularly cocky F-302 pilot piped up, "What the fuck's it to you? Heard that sub turned you down flat anyway."

Carmine was not known for being a man who lost his temper. He was generally calm and rational... but it took Ramon and two others to pull him off that wiseass pilot.

\---------------

Steven sat across from Sheppard. Both men had watched the security footage of the incident a couple of times and gone over the written reports submitted by those involved.

Steven scrubbed his face with his hands and said, "I guess the trickle down ass reaming isn't working. And I also guess it shouldn't really surprise me that the pilot involved is Major Victor's second. I'm thinking I need to do some housecleaning when I get back to Earth. It's like some sort of fucking brain-rot took hold in my 302 squadron."

Sheppard sighed and nodded. "Yeah, there's definitely a bigger problem there than just sub bullying. There's a total lack of respect that definitely needs to be addressed. I'd suggest in a very fucking hard and public way."

"Yeah, but that's my problem to deal with. Now about Picone..."

\---------------

Carmine stood stiffly in Colonel Sheppard's office. He knew the Colonel was a hardass, and was expecting his punishment for the brawl to be severe.

Sheppard leveled a glare at Carmine, studying him for a long, uncomfortable moment but when he spoke his voice was even and without heat or temper.

"Well, Picone, do you have anything to say?"

"Sir, the situation certainly could have and should have been handled differently and I regret that it wasn't, but with all due respect, sir, I do not regret the altercation itself. He was out of line and needed a lesson in manners, sir. I apologize if I have brought any embarrassment to you or this command, and will willingly accept any punishment you deem fit for my actions, sir."

"What you did was certainly understandable, Commander, but you're right, it was avoidable. And should a similar situation arise in the future under my command I fully expect you to keep yourself in check. Understood?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. Now as far as punishment goes, Colonel Caldwell has requested to handle that himself. Report to his quarters this evening after your assigned duties."

"His quarters, sir?"

"Yes, the Colonel wants to handle this privately, Commander."

"Understood, sir."

"All right then, there will be no record of this in your personnel file. That being said, I am like an elephant that never forgets, and this shit is not tolerated on Atlantis, am I clear?"

"Absolutely, sir."

"Good. You have anything else you want to say or ask?"

Carmine hesitated but then said anyway, "I think there's a problem on this ship, sir. And from what I've heard and witnessed, it seems to originate in the 302 squadron, sir."

"Recent events have been more than highlighting that for us, Commander, but I would appreciate it if you would submit a report to me with specifics and copy Colonel Caldwell as well."

"You'll have it this afternoon, sir."

"I'll keep an eye out for it. Alright, you're dismissed."

"Thank you, sir."

\---------------

Carmine entered when acknowledged and braced himself for the worst. What he didn't expect was Caldwell's immediate order, "At ease, Commander."

"Sir," Carmine said as he went to parade rest.

"I think it's time for you and I to have a little conversation, Commander. Because as much as I'd like to think that it was my honor you were defending down there in the gym, we both know it wasn't. So for the rest of this conversation, I'm just Steven, you're just Carmine, and we're going to talk about Joey. So, I've got beer and I've got brandy, pick your poison."

Carmine blinked in surprise. This was not going at all as he expected, but he went with the flow. "Beer would be fine, thank you."

Steven pulled two beers out of the fridge in the corner and gestured Carmine toward the seating area. Handing him a beer he asked, "So what have you heard about me and Joey?"

Carmine had always prided himself on knowing when to show his cards and when to bluff. There was something about Caldwell that told him that he _needed_ to put all his cards on the table, so he answered honestly, "I was told that he wore your collar for a year and a half by a member of your crew that was warning me off. Joey himself has never said anything about that, but he did say that you were his first CO and that you've remained friends through the years."

"We'll get into who tried to warn you off in a minute, but yes, Joey was my collared submissive for about a year and eight months. We met when Joey was fresh out of boot camp and I was still a Major. I looked out for Joey back then, he doesn't have family you know."  
  
Carmine nodded. "He mentioned that he had been in foster care before joining the Air Force. I come from a big family myself, s... Steven." Both men grinned at his catch. "And I just can't imagine not having anyone. I'm glad you looked out for him."

"I was his direct CO at Peterson for about six months or so when I got reassigned to the Middle East. We weren't involved sexually or romantically back then, nothing more than friendship and mentoring. Our paths crossed now and then with deployments and it was just after I made Lieutenant Colonel that we were both deployed down in Guam. One thing led to another like things always do, and we found ourselves in an intense, exclusive relationship. I collared him two months later."

Carmine could see that the memories and story that Caldwell was telling were bittersweet to the man and he prompted gently, "But you didn't stay together."

"No," Steven replied. His brow furrowed and his expression grew solemn before he continued, "Our dynamic mesh just didn't work long-term. We both wanted and needed things that the other just couldn't give."

Steven paused and Carmine sat waiting for him to continue. The Colonel struck him as a very private person by nature and it had to be very difficult to share these most private things with, basically, a total stranger.

"I... I love Joey, Carmine, and I will for the rest of my life. I wanted to marry him and build a life and family with him. But in the end I loved him enough to let him go when it was best for him."

"You don't have to justify your feelings for Joey or your relationship with him to me, Steven," Carmine replied respectfully.

"I think I do. Because I suspect that you're going to be playing a big role in his future whether you both know it or not, and I don't want there to be any misconceptions about my past with him, or my present feelings."

"Sir?"

At Steven's raised eyebrow at the "sir", Carmine grinned in spite of the serious tone of the conversation. "Sorry, force of habit."

"Look, between the time that I took my collar off of him and now, there have been things that have happened with Joey. Things that are not my place to share with you. He's not the same man that he was back then. He's not... fragile, but he definitely needs gentle handling. Trust doesn't come easy for him these days, but he really likes you, and you make him feel safe, something he needs more than I can tell you."

Red rage filled Carmine's brain and he asked icily, "Did someone hurt him? Did some Dom not honor a safe word or something?"

Steven held up a hand cutting him off and replied, "That goes back to the stuff that needs to come from him. He'll tell you when he's ready, you just need to give him some time. How much time I don't know."

Carmine shook his head. "I'm not pressuring him, Steven, I would never do that. I asked him if he wanted to play when we first came on board but he declined and I respect that. We've been spending some time together, but that's... I just enjoy his company, there's no expectation, Steven."  
  
"But that brings us back to the incident that landed you here tonight. You and Joey may not be playing or having sex, but he's tripping every single one of your triggers, especially the protective and possessive ones. You need to reel them in."

"I've always been an overly protective top, regardless if the sub is mine or not. If you were to meet my mother, you'd see that I come by it naturally. But I understand what you're saying and I'll get a better handle on things."

"How many subs have you collared?"

Carmine picked at the label on his beer bottle, the turn in the conversation's direction one he really didn't want to take, but he answered, "Just one. A woman named Lisa. We were together almost three years, and had just started planning our wedding when..." Carmine reached up and stroked his scarred cheek with his fingertips. "Anyway, once I got stateside to recover and she saw what I actually looked like she just couldn't deal with it. A month after I got home, she asked me to remove her collar. So I did. I haven't had any other collared submissives."

Steven grimaced. "I'm sorry."

Carmine drained the rest of his beer and said, "Yeah, well, how did you word it? I loved her enough to let her go."

Steven nodded in complete understanding then changed the topic again. "So tell me what the hell you've seen going on with my crew? I'm starting a list of asses to paddle and I'd hate to miss anyone."

They talked through another beer about things that Carmine had seen and heard. He could see Steven getting more and more agitated and he offered with a little light humor, "You could always give them to me for PT, Steven. I can make them hurt in ways they've only dreamed of."

"I've heard about your infamous puke buckets already. But you may be onto something, some extra PT might keep all their asses out of trouble."

Their conversation dwindled and they stood. Caldwell held out his hand. "Carmine, I'm glad we had this opportunity to talk."

"Me too, Steven. I think it cleared the air, I wouldn't have wanted there to be tension between us. You're very important to Joey, and I... well, I want to be very important to Joey," Carmine replied with a little grin, shaking Steven's hand.

Steven nodded lightly and then let his expression sober. "I'm not going to give you the "you better not hurt him" speech. But I am going to promise you that if you hurt him physically there isn't hole deep enough in any galaxy for you to hide in. I _will_ kill you myself."

"All I can give you is my word, Steven, but somehow I don't think even that would be enough. I'm putting two and two together and getting that someone hurt Joey in the not so distant past. I _can_ promise you this though, that even if Joey and I never move past friendship, I _will_ personally gut anyone that ever hurts him."

"Good man, I knew I'd like you. Now go on and get out of here, and if anyone asks, I did nothing but scream at you for the past hour."

"Yes, sir," Carmine replied with a cocky little salute.

\---------------

The remaining days on board the _Daedalus_ passed without incident. The wide berth most of the crew gave to Carmine because of his appearance became even wider as news of his reaction in the gym made the rounds. Thankfully, Joey didn't seem to be aware of the specifics of the altercation and Carmine was glad.

Joey's comfort level with Carmine, and with Adrian and Ramon, grew every day. Adrian in particular had simply tucked Joey under his wing and adopted him as a long-lost relative. The friendship that was developing between the two subs was strong and good for both of them.

The day before they were scheduled to arrive at Atlantis, Carmine made a point of stopping by the infirmary. He grinned seeing Anka and the smile she returned was quick and lit up her face. He noticed that her hair was now worn up loosely in a clip and she had an aura about her that was practically glowing.

"Lieutenant."

"Commander," she replied playfully.

He pointed to one of her little curls hanging near her cheek. "I like this look."

She blushed and replied, "Thank you, sir."

"I just wanted to stop in today and say my goodbyes, tomorrow's going to be pretty chaotic and I didn't want to miss seeing you."

"I wish I could see Atlantis, from what I've seen in pictures it's beautiful."

"You could always request a transfer."

The blush was back on her cheeks and, shyly, she said, "I think I would rather stay on the _Daedalus_ , sir."

"That look on your face is telling me that it's a who and not a what making you want to stay."

She grinned and replied, "I've been seeing someone for a couple of weeks and I think he's going to offer me a collar."

"You look very happy about that, Anka. He's a good guy?"

"Yes, sir. He's wonderful actually, makes me feel like a princess."

"Well you are, but that's a whole other conversation. So does this wonderful Dom have a name?"

Carmine was pretty sure he knew who it was having seen Scalfani and Anka having dinner together in the mess on a couple of occasions, but she confirmed it for him. "Sergeant Scalfani, he works down in the armory. I think you know him."

Carmine nodded and said honestly, "I'm happy for you, Anka, you deserve someone wonderful."

She smiled widely and Carmine couldn't help but think that Scalfani was a truly lucky bastard.

\---------------

Joey was saying his own goodbyes in Steven's quarters as they shared a final dinner together.

They were just moving on to dessert when Joey quietly said, "I started meeting with someone. The doctor in the infirmary set it up for me."

Steven's reply was gentle. "Good. You're comfortable with the counselor he set you up with?"

Joey nodded. "Yeah, she's great. She's a sub, too, and she understands where I'm coming from. I'm feeling positive about my dynamic for the first time in what feels like forever."

"You have no idea how glad I am to hear that."

They ate in silence for a few minutes when Joey asked hesitantly, "Was that fight that Commander Picone got into because of me? No one will tell me anything."

Steven had never lied to Joey and wasn't about to start now. "Yes and no. I've got some issues with my 302 squad that I need to address, they're getting a little too big for their own britches and Picone took offense at some things that were said."

"Someone said something about you and I, didn't they?"

"Yeah. But it's nothing you need to worry about."

"I told him you and I were close, but I didn't tell him you collared me."

"I know, he told me." At Joey's questioning look, Steven continued, "He and I had a long talk about me and you and where I stand in the picture. I didn't tell him anything about Borden or what happened, that's up to you. Carmine is good guy, Joey, and if I can't have you, I'd want you to be with someone like him."

"His cousin told me about his last sub, and about how she left him because of his injuries. I don't know how she could do that. You don't do that to someone you love."

"You don't see his scars do you?"

"No," Joey said with a little grin, thinking instead about the way Carmine's shoulders stretched his t-shirt, his strong hands, and the quick smile he always had for him.

Steven shook his head and teased playfully, "You two just might be good for each other."

\---------------

Their arrival on the city was chaotic at best. There were people arriving on Atlantis and people leaving, and there was a mountain-sized amount of equipment and supplies that had to be off-loaded.

Joey was one of the few not immediately told to go to his newly assigned quarters, instead he was overseeing the crates of parts and new equipment that fell under his purview. When he first walked into the large open area where the MALPS and FREDS were kept he had to keep his mouth from dropping open in dismay. The area was a shambles at best. Random crates and boxes of things without rhyme, reason, or even a label were stuffed here and there around the room. Tools were lying haphazardly around, just looking to be lost or tripped over. Joey decided that Siler would have had a heart attack on the spot to _ever_ see the MALP bay at the SGC in such a state, and Joey wondered why it had been allowed to get this bad.

There was no one currently in the area, so Joey started shoving things out of the way to make room for the pallets to be beamed down from the _Daedalus_.

"What are you doing?" a voice bellowed from behind Joey. He turned to see a thoroughly pissed off Marine Corporal.

"I'm making room for incoming supplies, Corporal."  
  
The Corporal's eyes flashed to Joey's lapels and he straightened up a little upon realizing that Joey outranked him.

"With all due respect, sir, this is my work area."

Joey decided to try to defuse what was sure to be an uncomfortable situation. "Actually, Corporal James, my name is Master Sergeant Joe Olsen, and I've been assigned to oversee this area, including staff and equipment. It's nice to meet you."

Joey could see that the young Corporal was having issues, both from having an interloper in his domain as well as finding out that his new immediate superior officer was a sub.

"Colonel Sheppard approved this, Sergeant Olsen?" James asked disbelieving.

"Of course, but you can feel free to verify it with him if you like."

Joey had to work hard not to smirk at the sight of the Corporal swallowing hard at the idea of taking this up with Colonel Sheppard, somehow Joey didn't think that Sheppard would appreciate having to deal with such petty bullshit their first day back.

"This is a permanent assignment for you, sir?" the Corporal asked, not able to keep the hope out of his voice that Joey was just there to oversee the delivery of new equipment and would be leaving with the _Daedalus_.

"Yes, now how's about giving me a hand clearing some room? We've got more MALPs, some ATV's, and a ton of spare parts getting ready to be beamed down."

The Corporal didn't say much while they worked, but the tension in the room was thick enough to cut with a knife.

Their pallets beamed down and the area immediately became beyond overcrowded and completely non-functional. Inwardly Joey groaned, he had his work cut out for him.

After a couple grueling hours of grunt work where he and James lugged equipment, Joey finally dismissed James for the evening. When the Corporal was finally gone, taking the tension in the room with him, Joey let out a deep breath and really looked around, noting that even the most utilitarian areas of the city were beautiful. He was glad that he took the assignment and couldn't wait to see more of the city. As he looked around he realized that General O'Neill was right, this could be a fresh start for him. He had the opportunity to build something professionally with his own stamp on it. As an image of Carmine flashed in his mind, he thought it might also be a chance to maybe build something new personally.

His radio chimed in his ear and he answered it, "Olsen."

Without preamble Carmine teased, "I haven't seen you all day and I just wanted to check and see if a MALP got beamed down on top of your head by accident."

"No, but I think my headache would have been less if one had."

"That bad?"

"Let's just say that my to do list looks like a copy of War and Peace."

"Have you eaten anything?"

"Not since lunch," Joey answered sheepishly.

"Alright, I'll be down in bit after I swing by the mess."

Joey started to say, "You don't have to..." when he realized that Carmine had already dropped the connection.

A half hour later Carmine, with Ramon and Adrian in tow entered the area.

Ramon whistled and said, "Holy shit, man, looks like a fucking bomb went off in here."

Carmine nodded and added, "Whoever the fucking slob is needs their ass spanked. You can't work like this."

Adrian had a tray with some fruit and sandwiches that he placed on top of a crate. "Let's eat, then get this shit straightened out."

Joey picked up sandwich gratefully and asked, "You guys don't have somewhere else you have to be?"

Carmine reassured Joey, "No, the next few days are pretty calm for all the special forces teams while everyone settles in on the city."

They ate and then spent a couple more hours working and joking around, and Joey found himself filled with a warm feeling that he couldn't quite put his finger on. It was some sort of heady sense of family and camaraderie that had been missing in his life for entirely too long.

When they had the area to the point where they could at least walk without tripping on something, and the two new MALPS unpacked and near the entrance ready to be deployed if needed, they called it a night.

Adrian and Ramon headed for the mess, looking for something resembling pie to satisfy their sweet tooths, while Carmine walked Joey to his new quarters. The folks that had traveled with them on the _Daedalus_ had gotten used to Carmine's appearance, but now on Atlantis, a lot of people couldn't keep the surprise and often repulsion off their faces as the two men walked through the corridors.

Joey asked quietly, "You get that a lot don't you?"

Carmine shrugged and replied, "People get used to it."

Joey swallowed nervously and admitted, "That first day in PT, I didn't notice until you pointed it out."

Carmine paused and looked sideways at Joey, a wide smile on his face as he asked, "Really?"

"Really," Joey affirmed as his cheeks, ears, and neck turned scarlet.

Carmine bumped Joey's shoulder with his and said, "Cool."

Most people observing the two men in the hallway would have assumed by their body language that they were a long-standing pairing, Joey's lack of a collar not withstanding, and as the old Atlantis expedition members took inventory of the new expedition members, the word would quickly make the rounds that Joey and Carmine were on the unofficial "unavailable" list.

As they reached Joey's quarters he yawned and apologized, "Sorry, sir, it's been a long day. I'm looking forward to a hot shower and being horizontal for a while."  
  
Almost as if his mouth was on autopilot, Carmine retorted playfully, "Want some company?"

At Joey's surprised expression Carmine apologized but decided to be honest. "Sorry, I couldn't resist. Look, I'm not trying to pressure you, but I want you to know, for the record, that if you ever _do_ want company you just need to let me know."

Joey's cheeks flamed, but he looked Carmine square in the eye and said, "I know, and I'm sorry, I just... I just can't yet. But I'm working on it, and I want you to know that."

Carmine could see the flurry of emotions in Joey's eyes and he took a chance and stepped a bit closer to him and gently cupped Joey's face in his big hands. His words were low and for Joey's ears only as he said, "Whenever _you're_ ready, I'll be here."

Joey nodded, his eyes locked with Carmine's. Carmine savored the intimate moment a bit longer then pressed a kiss to Joey's forehead and released him.

\---------------

The next morning Joey had a quick breakfast in the mess and headed for a meeting called by Lieutenant Commander Matthew Sheppard. When he entered the room Joey realized that the group assembled was made up completely of military submissives.

Commander Sheppard was without a doubt the most beautiful and confident sub that Joey had ever seen. Joey listened intently as Commander Sheppard reminded everyone of their rights as subs, and then moved on to talk about personal safety and what to do if there is a problematic Dom. He was so eloquent and self-assured that most of the subs, Joey included, were a little in awe. Even though Commander Sheppard was a sub himself, he somehow managed to make every other sub in the room feel looked after and cared about.

When he dismissed the meeting, everyone filed out. Joey heard, "Olsen," and turned back around to face Commander Sheppard.

"Sir?"

"Hang back a minute, would you?"

Joey did just that and once the others had left, Commander Sheppard closed the door, giving them privacy.

"What I'm about to say may seem odd, Sergeant, but here goes. Both my brother, Colonel Sheppard, and Major Lorne asked me to make a point of speaking to you personally at some point. They didn't give me any specific details as to why exactly, but they wanted me to stress to you in particular that if you have any issues on Atlantis that you can bring them to any one of us, any time. And like I said to everyone earlier, in the grand scheme, I'm the highest ranking military submissive in the expedition, and I want to know if any sub has a problem. We can't fix something if we don't know it's broken."

"I understand, sir, and I appreciate your concern."

Sheppard studied Joey's face for a moment and ticked his head to the side a little. "When Colonel Sheppard asked me to talk to you, it made me curious and I pulled your personnel file. There's a lot of redacting in there and a big chunk of missing time. I'm not going to push you to tell me what happened, because I've been around long enough to recognize what that chunk of missing time usually means for a submissive. And if I add in to it that General O'Neill has put restrictions on the type of punishments you can receive and how the two senior officers in this command are asking me to talk to you about what to do if someone's hassling you, I'm getting a pretty clear picture.

Joey opened his mouth to speak but nothing would come out.

Sheppard stepped forward and reached over and squeezed Joey's shoulder, grounding him. He continued gently, "You're not the first submissive to be assaulted, Olsen, and I'm letting you know that I know because if you need _anything_ you just have to tell me and I'll make it happen."

Joey could see the anger at the thought that someone would assault a fellow submissive lurking in Commander Sheppard's eyes. Joey swallowed hard and replied, "I'm... okay, sir. I'm working through some things with a counselor, but Atlantis is a good thing for me. I'm excited to be here and I can't imagine having problems with anyone in Colonel Sheppard's command."  
  
Commander Sheppard grinned and said with humor, "He _is_ a hard ass."

"That's not always a bad thing, sir."

Sheppard laughed and shook his head. "His fan club just keeps growing and growing. All right then, Olsen. Just remember, we're here if you need us."

"I will, sir. Thank you."

\---------------

Corporal James was not happy. He had been blissfully happy on his own without direct supervision in his face on a daily basis, but now he had to deal with Joey and he wasn't happy.

Currently Joey had a clip board and was pointing to each MALP, FRED and other piece of equipment and grilling James on the current status of the item as well as its last preventative maintenance. Preventative maintenance was a problem, the Corporal hadn't been keeping up with it, even though he reported that he had.

The Corporal was getting more surly and unpleasant as the day went on. Finally Joey had had enough, and in a tone that channeled Steven at his most irritated, blasted James, "Corporal, this entire area is a fucking pit. Do you have any idea how important this equipment is to the teams that go offworld? Their lives depend on this equipment working properly and you just don't seem to fucking care. You've lost tools that you need, you've got bad and broken parts mixed in with new, and you haven't done the basic maintenance needed to keep shit from breaking in the first place. Now we _are_ going to get this hole organized and cleaned up, and we _are_ going to get the preventative maintenance done on _every_ piece of gear in here. And we're going to do it _my_ way. Am I clear?"

Corporal James looked like he was going to explode and when Joey just glared back and repeated, "My way, Corporal, or you can go see Master Chief Frost right now and ask to be reassigned."

\---------------

"I really thought he'd go to the Master Chief when it was all said and done, but he didn't. Just sucked it up and followed my orders the rest of the day."

Carmine couldn't help but notice that Joey's confidence had seemed to get a boost somewhere along the way, and it was nice to see. He laughed and said, "He probably never thought about how what he does affects the guys going through the gate, not really."

Joey nodded. "Yeah, he's very young and was part of the original expedition and I think he's been sort of on his own down there too long."

"Is he having a hard time taking orders from a submissive?"

"I think at first, but once I yelled at him that no longer seemed to be a problem."

Carmine chuckled as he balled up his napkin and dropped it on his tray. "So what are your plans for tonight?"

Joey made a face and replied, "I should study, but I think my brain's a little fried for that tonight, so I don't know. What about you?"

Carmine grinned and admitted, "I'm getting antsy being cooped up all the time. I was thinking about taking a hike around out on the piers and getting some fresh air. Up for it?"

"Sounds good."

\---------------

 

Their conversation was light as they walked, talking mostly about the things they were seeing at the moment. They reached a far point on one of the piers and sat down for a while with their legs dangling over the edge.

Carmine was looking out at the ocean, a peaceful look on his face as the sea breeze brushed past them. He broached tentatively, "So you and Caldwell, huh?"

"Yeah, but it was a long time ago."

"He still cares about you, you know. A lot."

Joey hesitated a moment, then answered honestly, "I know, and I still care about him, too, but he and I just don't work together long-term and we both accepted that."

Carmine's voice was gentle as he replied, "I'm sorry. He's a good man."

"Yes, he is. He's the closest thing I've ever had to family."

The sun was dipping past the horizon sending deep orange streaks across the water. The two men watched the sun sink in comfortable silence.

It was Joey's turn to tentatively broach another painful topic. "Adrian told me about Lisa, I'm sorry."

A bittersweet smile graced Carmine's mouth and he said, "She was so beautiful. There was nothing I wouldn't have given her if she asked."

Before Joey could reply, Carmine chuckled coarsely. "You know my _Mamma_ hated her. She said Lisa was shallow and heartless. I never saw it until the day she came into my hospital room and asked me to take off her collar. In the end, _Mamma_ was right."

Joey's hand lifted automatically and moved to rub Carmine's back in support. He caught it before the contact was made though, and he tried to nonchalantly hide the motion and dropped his hand down to the pier.

With a grin and a very overt move, Carmine reached over and put his hand on top of Joey's and looked over at him. "You can touch me any time you want, Joey, I promise to behave myself."

Joey's cheeks flamed and he became aware of Carmine's thumb gently rubbing along his and it gave him a little courage. "There's something I need to tell you, Carmine, but I don't know how and I honestly don't know if I'm ready to tell anyone."

"Joey, I'm getting a pretty good idea that some Dom abused your trust somewhere along the way. I can't fix what happened in your past, all I can do is work at building the trust between us right here, right now, and I'm willing to do whatever you need me to do to accomplish that."

Carmine shifted to face Joey in the dying light and met his gaze. "This isn't just about sex or dynamics for me. I'm not quite sure how it happened so fast, but you've become someone who is very important to me. And I can wait as long as you need me to wait for the rest."

Joey turned his hand over and squeezed Carmine's, his voice choked with emotion as he replied, "You're very important to me, too."

Carmine pulled his hand away and lifted his arm, "C'mere," he said lightly and was inordinately pleased when Joey slid closer and practically melted into him when he put his arm around Joey's shoulder and pressed him in close. They lost track of exactly how long they sat out on that pier like that, but when they finally went inside, the planet's moons were high in the night sky.

\---------------

Joey found himself tucked between Ramon and Carmine to bear witness to the morning's punishment detail. Watching Colonel Sheppard strip naked and cane that obnoxious fuck of a scientist had been an intense experience. When they were dismissed and were making their way out of the room, Carmine asked quietly, "You all right? You went a little pale in there."

"I just hate that Doctor Phelps thought he could treat Doctor Kusanagi that way. It's not right."

"No it isn't, and I think the Colonel got that point across loud and clear."  
  
"I hope so. I need to go, they've got three teams heading offworld and I want to be sure the equipment is squared away."

"Lunch?"

"Actually I'm meeting with Dr. Beckett around then, I don't know how long that will take."

"Beckett?"

"Yeah, I'm scheduled for the gene therapy injection and an initial meet and greet."

"Let me know how it goes."  
  
Joey nodded and gave Carmine a grin before turning and heading off.

"Your _Mamma_ will like him you know," Ramon teased from behind Carmine.

"You think so?" Carmine asked a little wistfully.

"Oh, yeah. And so will your _Papa_ , I can see those two tinkering in his workshop for hours."

Carmine smiled at the thought. His father was a gentle man, a sub with a willingness to please and a sense of humor that diffused many a tense situation at home. He was the perfect complement to the spitfire that was Carmine's _Mamma_. Ramon was right, he could picture Joey and his father hitting it off well, and he wondered when he might get the opportunity to introduce them. It never even occurred to him that he wouldn't.

\---------------

Carson was one of the few in the expedition that had access to Joey's complete medical file. General O'Neill had sent it specially encoded for Carson's eyes only and at General O'Neill's request he had read it thoroughly, twice actually. He had been glad he took the General's advice and done it at the end of his day yesterday so he could follow up the grim reading with a strong belt of scotch.

Carson quickly found them a private area to talk. "Sergeant, would you like to have a medical advocate present?"

Joey was visibly uncomfortable at the thought and quickly said, "No, sir. I'll be fine with just you if that's okay."

Carson didn't feel the need to go over every iota of Joey's file but they did touch on a few things that made Joey flush and stammer out his replies.

"Now I see that you requested a referral for counseling while on board the _Daedalus_ and that you've been seeing Doctor Johnson. Is that working out for you or would you like to try speaking with one of the other psychologists I have on staff?"

"No, sir, Doctor Johnson is great. She makes me feel very comfortable talking to her and I'd rather not change if I don't have to."

"She does have that way about her, eh, lad? We're lucky to have her. But just so you know, you are able to switch at any time, no questions asked, all right?"

"Yes, sir."

"Okay, then, shall we move on to the gene therapy then?"

At Joey's nod, they did just that and in no time Joey was hopping off the table, free to go.

"Thank you, Doctor, I'll come back to test it in a couple of hours."

"Sergeant, I ... I just want you to know that I take great offense at what happened to you, both as a doctor and as a Dom. And if there is anything I can do for you in either of those capacities, I will be more than happy to do so. If you have questions about your own body or need someone to check in with or push off someone that's not taking no for an answer please let me know, it'll be no trouble at all."

"I appreciate that, sir."

"Oh, there is one other thing I should mention. I know you have General O'Neill listed as your official medical proxy with Colonel Caldwell as a secondary. You might want to consider also having someone stationed on Atlantis as well. We're a wee bit remote out there in Pegasus and having someone closer to home would be a wise idea. So if you have a friend or someone you trust among the expedition you might want to talk to them about it and just let me know so I can update your records.."  
  
"I hadn't even thought about that, Doctor. I'll see what I can figure out and I'll get back to you on that."

"Excellent. Well, unless there is anything else, off you go, lad."

"Thanks again, sir."

Carson watched Joey walk away and his brow furrowed sadly thinking about the things he had read in Joey's file. He was a beautiful and gentle sub that deserved to be cherished and looked after. Carson hoped that he found someone on Atlantis that could look past his history and shower him with the all attention and love that a sub like Joey needed.

\---------------

Carmine's radio chimed and he answered it promptly. "Picone."  
  
It was Joey on the other end bubbling with excitement. "It worked. The gene therapy worked for me."

"Excellent. Do you feel any different?" Carmine asked.

"Not so much as feel, but hear I guess. There's like background noise or something. Doctor Beckett says it's some sort of feed from the city itself. He pointed me towards some stuff to read about it on the server later on."

"There goes another night of studying," Carmine chided with a touch of humor. He took Joey's studies very seriously.

"Yeah, but knowing how to interact safely with the city is important. Guess it's a good thing I got so far ahead while we were in transit. So what are you working on?"

"War game scenarios. We're going to be heading to the mainland for a couple of days to kick the collective asses of the Marines and the Army Rangers."

Joey chuckled, all of the special forces guys had been trash talking to each other the entire trip to Atlantis. This round of first war games would give the winners bragging rights while the others ate their words.

"Sounds like fun. I'll let you get back to planning their demise."

"Hey, Joey?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad that you wanted to share your news with me."

Joey's quiet response of, "Nobody more, sir," made Carmine smile and unfurled a warm feeling somewhere deep in his gut.

\---------------

It took a solid week of work to get their work area organized and squared away. Joey was very matter-of-fact about how he wanted things, and he worked just as hard alongside Corporal James as the younger man did to get it there. It only took a few days for people to stop bitching at James that this wasn't working or that wasn't working, and where the hell their MALPS were. They were working on going thoroughly through each piece of equipment and making needed repairs or completing preventative maintenance and Joey found himself in the odd position of being the teacher to the younger Marine. He taught through example just as Siler had done with him and it gave him a sense of personal accomplishment to be in the position to do so.

They were both hunched over a data pad going over the work schedule Joey had compiled from their list of preventative maintenance as well as the current off world mission schedule. Joey had been flabbergasted that James hadn't even had something so simple as a list of when equipment was going to be needed. Obviously unscheduled requests came up, but they were easy in comparison to always running behind for scheduled missions.

A deep, "Gentlemen," from the entrance to their area brought them both up short. They turned and immediately straightened upon seeing Master Chief Frost standing there. He walked further into the bay, looking around with interest and approval. He noted the neatly taped off and numbered "parking spots" on the floor for each vehicle, and he noted the new utility shelving along the back wall filled with clearly labeled totes of parts, and lastly he noted the work bench itself, with all the tools efficiently hung on a pegboard system.

Frost had seen what the area had looked like upon their arrival on the city and the transformation was nothing short of amazing.

He came to a stop in front of the two men. "Sergeant, Corporal."

Joey swallowed hard, the Master Chief's presence just filled the room. "Master Chief."

"We've got company arriving in a little under three weeks, members of the IOA and the new head of Homeworld Security." He glanced around with a little grin playing at the corners of his mouth and continued, "And I came down here to tell you that that's how long you had to get this area squared away, but it looks like that's not going to be an issue. It looks great down here. Nice work, Sergeant."

What Joey said next would forever cement Corporal James' loyalty to him. "Thank you, sir. But I can't take all the credit, the Corporal here has been working just as hard as I have."

Frost looked intently at Joey for a moment and he could feel the beginnings of his damnable flush starting on his cheeks. Finally, much to Joey's relief, he turned his attention to James and said, "Duly noted, Sergeant. Corporal, keep up the good work."

"Thank you, sir. I'm learning a lot from Sergeant Olsen, sir."

Frost nodded in acknowledgment then changed the subject and turned his attention back to Joey. "Sergeant, do you need anything down here? More shelving? Lights? Anything like that?"

"I believe we are set with that sort of thing for the time being, sir. I have another set of shelving that isn't assembled so storage isn't a problem. If the _Daedalus_ is coming back this soon though, sir, we have one MALP and one FRED that should probably go back to Earth. They were original to the expedition and both need serious overhauling, in reality they should probably just be scrapped, sir. It's just not time- or cost-effective to try to repair them."

"Send me an email with that information, Sergeant and I'll take care of it. Is there anything else you need?"

"Actually, sir, do you have time to go over some scheduling issues?"

"Absolutely, show me what you've got."

They dismissed James and Joey handed the Master Chief the data pad.

"This is a schedule of all our preventative maintenance and currently scheduled missions."

Joey knew exactly how long each standard maintenance task took and had incorporated time blocks in the schedule for everything. The schedule was full, too full for just two people to accomplish.

It only took Frost a glance at the schedule to come to the same conclusion. "You need at least one more body down here."

"Yes, sir. Ideally two, where we could stagger schedules so that there was someone here around the clock."

"I told them I thought they shorted you on personnel. Okay, I'll see who I can reassign."  
  
"May I make a suggestion, sir?"

"Of course, Sergeant."

"It might not be a bad idea to have some folks rotate in and out. Sort of spread the skill set around a little. You know, just in case, sir."

Frost nodded thoughtfully, no one wanted to think about losing people, but it happened and planning a little in advance for it could lessen the immediate impact of the loss of skills.

He handed the data pad back to Joey and said, "That's good thinking, Sergeant. Send me a copy of that schedule and I'll see what I can do on that front. Anything else?

He could see Joey hesitate to answer. He raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms and waited expectantly.

"Sir, I know I don't need to be privy to all the details of every mission, but I've requested to be informed about the type of planetary terrain that the equipment goes to, for example, if it's a sandy planet or a wet bog. I've asked twice now, but I've been told that I don't need that information and don't have the necessary clearance. But if I know the type of terrain the vehicles have been to, sir, I can sometimes eliminate time-consuming tasks that just aren't necessary in turning them around for their next mission."

"Sounds logical to me, Sergeant. I'll talk to Major Lorne and see why that type of information request would be refused."

"Thank you, sir."

Frost turned to leave, but before he did he said lightly with a little grin, "You're doing a good job and I'm pleased, Master Sergeant. You're giving me hope for Air Force NCO's."

Frost only allowed himself to chuckle over the sight of Sergeant Olsen's scarlet flush once he had left the bay, even though Sean was his whole world, it still amused him when other subs would so completely and unconsciously react to his dynamic.

\---------------

Joey's twice weekly sessions with Doctor Johnson were going well and she was pleased with his progress and eagerness to work so diligently at his issues.

Little did she realize, his eagerness wasn't so much borne out of her pleasant nature and counseling skills, but rather an increasing desire to have a certain Navy SEAL's hands on him.

Two weeks before the Daedalus arrived back to Atlantis, Joey found himself oddly without Carmine's company; Carmine and his team were off world.

He had eaten dinner in the dining hall with Adrian and was heading back to his quarters alone when someone fell into step next to him as he walked. He glanced over and saw a civilian top he didn't recognize, but the man's presence made his skin crawl.

"On your own, tonight?" the man asked Joey.

"Excuse me?" Joey asked, not quite liking the man's tone.

"I just saw that you're by yourself for a change, figured I'd ask if you want some company."

Joey paused in the hallway and turned towards the other man. Upon fully seeing him, he tried to stave off the flares of panic he felt in his gut, and firmly replied, "I'm sorry, I'm _not_ entertaining socially at this time."

Without batting an eye or even acknowledging that he heard Joey, the other man took a step closer into Joey's personal space and said, "Oh, come on. I'm a whole lot prettier than that big ugly Jarhead that's always hanging around you. I'll show you a great time."

The closer the man got the more the panic set in and the harder it got to breathe. Then the man's hand dared to brush his cheek, and the next thing Joey knew he was squinting at a penlight being shined into his eyes.

"Easy, lad," came Carson's calming voice.

The corridor was crowded with military and civilians alike and as Joey sat up he was mortified, completely and utterly mortified.

Joey didn't say a word as Carson disbursed the crowd and escorted Joey to the infirmary under his own steam.

Carson could see that the sub looked devastated and broken. According to his records, Joey hadn't had a panic attack like that in almost two years, and Carson wondered what, or more specifically _who_ caused it.  
  
Joey submitted to a medical scan which showed nothing other than slightly irregular blood pressure, which was understandable given the circumstances.

Carson gave Joey a light sedative and kept him in the infirmary for the night.

\---------------

Joey woke slowly to see Carmine sitting in the hard plastic chair next to his infirmary bed, a worried set to his face.

When he saw that Joey was awake he leaned in and smiled gently. "Hey, sleeping beauty."

"Hey," Joey replied weakly. As much as he wanted Carmine there right now, he didn't want to have to explain what happened or why.

"Doc says we can spring you after breakfast."

Joey nodded, but didn't say anything.

Joey was painfully quiet through the meal that was placed in front of him, and remained so as Carmine walked him to his quarters.

"You going to be all right for a while? I've got to go debrief," Carmine asked.

"I'll be okay, I always am."

Carmine's expression grew serious at Joey's reply and he said, "Okay. But you and I _are_ going to talk about that particular statement at some point. I'll be back for lunch."

Joey went inside and curled up on the couch near the window staring out at the ocean. He didn't move from that spot for a very long time.

\---------------

Carmine, Ramon, and the rest of their team quickly got through the debrief. Ramon could see that Carmine was a little distracted and knew that he was worried about Joey.

When they left the meeting, Carmine headed for the security office. He wanted to see exactly what had happened with Joey. Ramon fell into step with him, sensing that there was trouble brewing.

Sergeant Bates quickly showed Carmine the video of the incident. They watched it three times, and Bates and Ramon could both feel the rage building in Carmine.

In a low and deadly voice, Carmine asked Bates, "Do you know who that top is?"

"Yes, sir, that's Dr. Scott Kent, he's a chemist I believe."

"Thank you, Sergeant."

Carmine turned to go and Ramon and Bates shared a worried look before Ramon quickly followed Carmine.

Ramon asked, "You're not planning anything stupid are you?"

Through gritted teeth Carmine replied, "I'm just going to talk to him."

The expression on Ramon's face showed his disbelief.

They entered a lab area and Carmine beaded on Kent. With his arms crossed across his chest and his entire demeanor adversarial, Carmine asked, "Are you Dr. Scott Kent?"

Kent paled when he realized who was addressing him, but he replied, "Yes, I am."

"And you being a doctor should mean you're a pretty smart guy, right?"

Kent made the mistake of getting snotty back to Carmine, "Given that I have two doctorates I'd have to say that, _yes_ , I'm a pretty smart guy."

"I'm also going to assume that you since you seem to understand my questions and do not have any hint of an accent that English is your primary language?"

"Yes, but how is any of this any business of yours?"

"Let's just say I'm a little confused then, _Doctor,_ because if you're supposedly a pretty smart guy and you understand English just fine, why the fuck you would dare touch a submissive, _without_ permission, who had _just_ told you he wasn't interested and offer to show him a good time."

"That was a private conversation."

"No, technically it borders on assault and your ass will be on a cross for it, I promise you."

"You have no authority over me, he doesn't wear your collar."

"No, I don't. But I will make damn sure that it's taken seriously by the people who do."

"This will never go anywhere and you know it."

"Maybe it will, maybe it won't, but you had better take what I'm about to say to heart. Do _not_ go near Olsen again, he's off-limits to you. Am I clear?"

"Again, you have no authority over me, and he doesn't wear your collar. I can interact with anyone I damn well choose."

Carmine took a step toward Kent and Ramon made ready to keep him from killing the mouthy scientist. Kent paled and Carmine leaned in and said in a low voice for Kent's ears only, "For the record, the big, ugly Jarhead is actually a Navy SEAL that has spent his entire career sneaking in and out of places and slitting throats. So when I tell you that you _will_ leave Olsen alone, you will, because trust me when I say, you _don't_ want me to pay you a midnight visit."

Carmine stepped back and Kent's face was almost as white as his lab coat.

He turned and left the lab with Ramon just a step behind.

\---------------

Joey's door chimed and he forced himself to move to answer it. The concerned face of Dr. Johnson was probably the only one he actually wanted to see.

She smiled warmly and said, "I heard there was an incident last night and I thought I would see if you wanted to talk about it."

Joey nodded and gestured for her to enter.

They settled themselves at his small table and she sat quietly, waiting for him to say something. It took him a moment before blurting out, "He looks and sounds just like Borden."

"And that triggered the panic attack?"

Joey nodded and the floodgate opened, the impromptu session digging out some of the deepest issues Joey struggled with.

They talked for close to two hours and Joey's mood and demeanor were much lighter at the end of their conversation than they had been when she arrived.

\---------------

Carmine gripped the handrail on the balcony, allowing the gentle sea breeze to calm him.

Ramon was next to him, leaning on his forearms on the railing. He said carefully, "That idiot was right about one thing, man. Joey doesn't wear your collar, and you're not contracted. Technically, he's fair game for other tops to pursue."

Carmine sighed. "I know."

"Look, I don't want to pry into your private business, but I get the vibe that some asshole along the way did something to Joey that makes him afraid to trust other Doms."

"Yeah, that's about what I know. I think he and I are building something good, Ramon, but I can't push him, we've gotta take this at his pace. But I can't protect him this way. I don't know what the fuck to do anymore."

"I don't know, Carm. You know I'll look out for him, so will the rest of the team, hell, even that little piss-ant Corporal that works for him has glared at other tops looking the wrong way at Joey."

That made Carmine chuckle. "He's a good kid."

They stood there soaking up the sun and the breeze for a couple of minutes when Carmine said sadly, "I can't get the image of how absolutely terrified Joey was on that video out of my head."

"Yeah, I know," Ramon replied and reached over and gave Carmine's shoulder a squeeze.

Carmine grinned wryly and said, " _Mamma_ would know what to do, she always knows what to do."

Ramon snorted. "Well, maybe you need to start thinking like your _Mamma_ then."

\---------------

At Dr. Johnson's prompting, Joey radioed Doctor Beckett and asked for a favor which was granted with an unseen wince on Carson's end.

\---------------

Carmine grabbed lunch for the two of them and went to Joey's quarters. A pretty brunette sub was leaving as he arrived, Carmine remembered seeing her on board the _Daedalus_ but didn't know who she was. The smile she gave Joey as she left was warm and supportive and the one she gave Carmine was appreciative and a little nervous.

Carmine stepped inside and said, "She's pretty."

Joey took the tray from Carmine and put it on the table and gestured towards the couch. "Can we sit and talk for a few minutes?"

"Sure." Carmine was dialing down everything, his emotions, his dynamic, and especially the overwhelming urge to pull Joey into his arms and just hold onto him for dear life.

Joey nervously wiped his palms on his pant legs and took a breath. "That was Dr. Emily Johnson. She's a psychologist that I started seeing when we were on board the _Daedalus_."

Carmine nodded and allowed Joey to run the conversation.

"You said that you had a pretty good idea that a Dom somewhere along the way had abused my trust. You're right, but there's a lot more to it than that."

"Okay."  
  
"A little over three years ago, Steven was overseeing certain projects at Area 51 and he met an Air Force Major there named Raymond Borden. I had been working at the SGC for a couple of years by that point and Steven introduced us, thinking we might hit it off. We had similar interests and our dynamic mesh worked well for both of us. After about a month, we contracted for a year with the idea that at the end we would either mutually separate or I'd accept Borden's collar."

"Nothing unusual there."

"No, but the problem was that Borden wasn't what he seemed to be. He was actually NID, or more specifically, the part of the NID that became the Trust. He was trying to subvert as many SGC and Area 51 personnel as he could, not to mention his outright theft of classified information. I had absolutely no idea, and he never tried to turn me personally. I guess I was just too low on the totem pole. Anyway, I never learned all the details but from what I put together, General Hammond and then _Colonel_ O'Neill suspected Borden of being a Trust operative. To trap him, bogus information was planted that they could trace back to him. Unfortunately somehow he found out about the sting. He blamed me for exposing him."

The vein in Carmine's temple was pulsing, he could almost predict where this conversation was heading and his rage was starting to simmer in his gut.

Joey swallowed hard and continued, "I didn't know anything was wrong. He picked me up at the gate and told me that he had called in a favor and gotten us both a few days of unscheduled leave and that he had rented us a little cottage to get away for a while, just the two of us. I believed him, I thought it was... romantic, I guess. He had me completely fooled and I had no idea what he was going to do."  
  
Joey wiped his hands on his pant legs again and kept his eyes downcast as he said, "He had me for three days before Colonel O'Neill and his team found us. I... I can't talk about what he did to me, not yet, it's something I'm working on, but I gave Dr. Beckett permission to go over it all with you, he said he would be waiting for you."

Carmine's voice was on the edge of breaking as he said quietly, "He tortured you, didn't he?"

Joey met Carmine's eyes and replied, "I guess that's the simplest word for it." He paused and took a deep breath that he let out slowly before continuing, "I didn't go non-dynamic, my dynamic is still there and still strong, but I haven't been able to let a Dom get close to me since. You need to know that besides all the stuff in my head that's fucked up, I have some medical issues that make getting physical with someone... difficult.

Carmine got a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach, he had heard of submissives being castrated against their will and he didn't know if could stand knowing if that had happened to Joey, but the not knowing was worse. "He didn't cas..." Carmine couldn't even say it.

"No, but he might as well have. Dr. Beckett will explain."

"How did you manage to stay on active duty? I would have thought they would have discharged you."

"The Air Force felt guilty. They knew Borden was dangerous and they knew I wasn't involved, but no one even attempted to get me out of the line of fire. Steven had full-blown conniptions all the way from Area 51 to the SGC. I've heard a rumor that he won't confirm for me that he punched O'Neill in the face and they had a knock-down-drag-out brawl. What happened doesn't affect my work itself so the Air Force lets me be."

"What happened to Borden?" Carmine asked with deadly intent.

"I don't know. I was told afterwards that Colonel O'Neill emptied his Beretta into his chest, but I was incoherent at the time and I don't know for sure."

"So what happened with you last night?"

"You saw the security footage?" At Carmine's nod, he answered, "That civilian looks and sounds exactly like Borden and I... I had a panic attack. I haven't had one like that in over two years."

Carmine scrubbed his face with his hands and let out a controlled breath. He met Joey's eyes and asked, "What... what can I do? What do you need from me to help you move forward? I'll do anything for you, _anything_."

Joey smiled sadly and admitted, "You've already been doing it. I really want you, and I can't even begin to tell you how much that surprised me at first. I want to be with you in every way, and be with you the way I used to be before Borden, but you need to go see Dr. Beckett and see if I'm still someone you might want after he tells you everything."

The resigned tone in Joey's voice told Carmine that Joey sincerely believed that once Carmine knew everything that he wouldn't want him. Carmine stood and stepped in front of Joey. He reached down and gently cupped Joey's face in his hands and promised, "There is _nothing_ that he could tell me that would make me not want you. Nothing, do you hear me?"

\---------------

Carson led the tense SEAL into one of the isolation areas and shut the door behind them. "Commander, though I know what I am about to tell you is going to make you very angry, please try not to break things if you can, myself included."

Carmine's voice was flat and devoid of emotion as he replied, "There's only one person I want to break because of this, Doctor, and it's not you."

"Right then. Okay, I guess starting at the beginning is the best place. According to statements made by Sergeant Olsen, Major Borden picked him up for a surprise getaway, and he had no indication that anything was wrong or what Borden was planning on doing. Olsen stated that everything was okay up to the point that Borden had him in cuffs and bound to the wall, which was normal play for them, but then from Olsen's account, Borden basically went insane and began screaming at him and beating him with a crop. Olsen safeworded but it was obviously ignored."  
  
Carson paused and he could see Carmine gritting his teeth in anger.

"After that we don't know exactly what happened, although we have a basic idea based on Olsen's injuries. He was most likely cropped and caned extensively. He had fractures or cracks on nearly every rib, broken bones in both feet, two broken wrists, a broken tailbone," Carson took a breath and swallowed hard before continuing, "And he had been brutally sodomized repeatedly."

Carmine's voice was low as he asked, "Joey said that he had medical issues that would make it difficult to be physical with someone, did he mean because of that?"

"I don't believe so. All of his broken bones mended just fine, and though there was extensive anal tearing and bruising that took a painfully long time to heal, heal they did and he's perfectly fine in that regard."

"What else then?"

"The very first day that Borden had Olsen, he tied Olsen's penis and testicles in an elaborate chastity type binding with a silk rope. It was on Olsen tightly the entire three days cutting off most circulation."

Carmine visibly paled and muttered, "Oh, christ, that's what he meant..."

"The doctors were able to save his penis and one of his testicles, but there was extreme vascular damage. They were not able to save the other testicle and he currently has a silicone replica in its place. He cannot achieve what you and I consider a proper erection. He can become aroused, but even at his most aroused, his version of an erection is soft and spongy. He'll never be able to penetrate anyone without some sort of mechanical aid."

Carmine closed his eyes for moment, his fists balled and tight in his lap. When he opened his eyes again, he relaxed his hands and asked calmly, "Is that all or is there more?"

Carson sighed and admitted, "Aye, there's more. When General O'Neill found Olsen he was strapped face down to a bed soaked with his blood. Not content with the brutality he had already inflicted upon Olsen, Borden took a razor blade to Olsen's back. This is what he did." Carson handed him the data pad that he had been holding.

The stark image on the screen was obviously taken in a hospital room and the wound itself was cleaned but gruesome. Borden had carved the word "cunt" across his back with an arrow pointing down to Joey's ass. Carmine's fingers ghosted over the image and he felt physically ill.

Carson swallowed and said quietly, "As you can see in the photo, Borden didn't just cut the lettering into Olsen's back, he actually removed wide strips of skin. There was very little they could do to avoid scarring, and this was before we had the Tollan creme." He reached over and tapped the screen, bringing up another image of Joey's back, healed this time, but with the word showing up clearly in the scar tissue.

Carmine was silent as he stared at the screen. Carson tactfully closed the picture and went on. "General O'Neill has restricted any potential punishments Olsen may receive to be private with either Colonel Sheppard or Major Lorne. He'll never be publicly punished and they are limited to the strap only. He's also exempt from being forced to use communal showers or exhibiting."

Carson paused a moment and let everything he had said sink into Carmine's brain before continuing. "Well, then, that's everything about his physical condition. I know he's been working with Doctor Johnson on some of his ongoing psychological issues, and she reports that it's going well. And the fact that you're here and speaking with me at his behest is a very good sign, it means he trusts you. Now do you have any questions for me, lad?"

Carmine's head was spinning with hurt and rage and an overwhelming sense of frustration. He asked quietly, "You said he's able to be aroused, does he... can he get _any_ pleasure from it? Can he have an orgasm?"

"Yes, to both. But you should know that there are times that he might not get any sort of an erection, even if he's very aroused, and he'll have no control over when and how he orgasms. Physically, he can have a fulfilling sex life with a top that's understanding and patient. It may not be the sex life he used to have, but with the right Dom he can build something that works for both of them. Emotionally, he's a little delicate in regards to his dynamic and sexuality. I'm not quite sure what triggered his panic attack last night, but he hasn't had one that extreme in over two years according to his records."

"The top that was hassling him looked and sounded like Borden," Carmine explained flatly.

"Ah. That explains it then. I sent Doctor McKay and Doctor Weir both a note about the incident, but in order to punish Doctor Kent, they will need Sergeant Olsen to lodge a formal complaint."

Carmine nodded, "He'll do it."

Carmine stood, still lost in his own thoughts, and turned to go. He paused and asked, "Do you know what happened to Borden?"

"No, I'm sorry, Commander, I only have Sergeant Olsen's medical file, I'm not privy to all the details about the entire incident, but perhaps Colonel Sheppard might know."

"Thank you, Doctor."  
  
'Commander, if there's anything I can do, or if either of you have more questions, please let me know."

Carmine nodded and left.

Carson watched the big man leave and hoped that things would work out for the two men. They had both lost so much in their lives, and they both deserved to have someone love them unconditionally.

\---------------

Carmine found himself in front of Colonel Sheppard's office door. At the acknowledgment to enter, he did and faced Colonel Sheppard.

Unbeknown to Carmine, Carson had radioed Sheppard with a heads-up that he should probably expect Carmine and why.

"Picone. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Major Raymond Borden, sir. Is he dead?"

Sheppard could see the red rage simmering in the SEAL and answered honestly, "We don't know."

Carmine's brow instantly furrowed and Sheppard held up a hand cutting him off. "When the team found Borden and Olsen, Borden was getting ready to leave the cabin. O'Neill himself emptied a clip into Borden's chest, but before they could even check to see if he still had a pulse he was beamed away by other rogue NID operatives in a cloaked ship in orbit. He hasn't been seen since and none of the operatives that we've rounded up since then have seen him either. We're ninety percent sure he's dead."

"Ninety?"

"O'Neill only took body shots, and if he were wearing a vest..."  
  
"Fuck."

"Yeah. That about sums it up." Sheppard stood up and moved around his desk to stand in front of Carmine. He felt for the other man, even if there wasn't anything he could do about it. He hated Samantha Carter with an unrivaled passion for the things she did to Rodney, but wobbly self-esteem aside, Rodney was perfect and whole and John couldn't imagine having the brutality that Olsen survived inflicted on anyone he cared about.

"Look, Picone, I'm not one for sticking my nose into other people's private affairs, but it's pretty obvious to just about everyone that you've got some pretty strong feelings going on for Olsen. And yes, I heard all about your little visit with Doctor Kent, ass that he is, and I watched the video, which did nothing but emphasize exactly just how _big_ of an ass. Putting that aside, you either need to fucking collar Olsen, or put some distance between the two of you. You've got to get a goddamn grip on your actions, Commander, because I can see in your eyes right now that you'll kill for him and it wouldn't matter who it was that you were gutting. And I get it, _believe_ me, I get it. I know what was done to him and I want to gut Borden myself and Olsen's not even mine."

Carmine nodded replied in a somewhat defeated tone, "Yes, sir," Carmine paused, then admitted, "I don't know how to protect him without collaring him, sir, and I don't think he'll ever trust another Dom again. Not to that level. Not after what Borden did to him."

Sheppard blew out a breath and thought hard for a moment. "Have you considered offering him a guardianship collar? It would give you the rights you need and give him the same level of protection as any other collared submissive, but it takes sex and a physical relationship out of the equation."

"I've never done that before."

"Neither have I, honestly. But it might be something to think about and talk over with Olsen."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."

"Fix this, all right? I don't want to end up strapping your ass to a cross because of this."

"Yes, sir."

"But speaking of asses on crosses, is Olsen going to lodge a formal complaint against Kent? I'm really hoping he will because that asshole needs a lesson in basic manners."

"I'll make sure he does, sir."

"Good. Go on, get out of here then."

Carmine turned to go and as he reached the door Sheppard added, "Oh, and by the way, Picone, just so you know, us Jarheads would be proud to call you one of our own."

That got a wan little half-grin out of Carmine and he nodded in acknowledgment before continuing on his way.

\---------------

Carmine needed to think and clear his head before seeing Joey again so he went for a run out to a far pier. He paced like a trapped panther back and forth at the pier's end as he tried to process everything that he had learned about Borden... and Joey. The more he thought about it, the angrier he got and his fists were balled and he desperately wanted to pound something. In the end he did something that he had last done after had Lisa asked him to remove her collar--he let out a primal scream that echoed and reverberated back towards the city. When he had screamed himself out, he felt a little better. He let the gentle sounds of the sea calm him even further before he turned and headed back to his quarters to shower and change before seeing Joey.

As he showered, Carmine thought about his parents. Carmine had never in his life wished to talk to his _Papa_ like he did right now. His father would know what Carmine should say to Joey, and would give him the right words to soothe Joey's fears. But most important of all, his father would pull him into a bear hug and remind Carmine that it was okay for even the strongest of tops to be sad and to grieve for what was lost, just like he had when Carmine returned home swathed in bandages and carrying around the collar that Lisa had asked him to remove.

Carmine turned the water off and grabbed a towel to dry himself off. He caught a glimpse of himself in the steamy mirror and for just a moment the steam obscured his scars and he looked like he did five years ago. He turned and flexed a bit, and smiled bittersweetly at the mirror, knowing his perfection was all a fleeting illusion. He looked over at the ruined master's marks on his bicep and was again eternally grateful that his _Mamma_ had insisted that he train at her pleasure house. _Casa di Bella Nascosta_ wasn't very big or very popular outside of the Italian-American community and their tenets that held to the idea that there was beauty in everyone weren't just a house philosophy, it was ingrained in every part of their training. No one but his pleasure master would ever know how close to blowing his brains out Carmine was after Lisa left him. Carmine had gone back and secluded himself for a couple of months as soon as his wounds would allow and his pleasure master had set himself to the task of reminding Carmine that he was still beautiful regardless of his appearance.

With a towel tied low on his hips Carmine started to pull clean clothes out of the drawer but stopped as a sudden realization dawned on him. Joey was consumed with doubts and fears about his own body, but he had no idea the extent of Carmine's injuries. Joey had only ever seen the scars on Carmine's arm, face, and neck. He just had no idea what the rest of Carmine looked like.

He dropped the clothes back in the drawer and turned and left his quarters.

\---------------

Joey was nervously pacing around his quarters. He had heard back from Dr. Beckett that the conversation with Carmine had gone as well as could be expected, but that had almost two hours ago and Carmine hadn't come back to see Joey yet like he promised he would.

His door chimed and he took a deep breath and released it slowly before opening it. He was glad he did because the sight of Carmine standing there in just a towel stole the rest of his breath away.

Carmine didn't enter Joey's quarters, just stood in the doorway as non-threatening as he could be and said, "I talked to Beckett and he told me everything, and showed me... pictures, and like I told you before I talked to him, there was nothing that he told me that in any way made me not want you. Not one fucking thing, Joey. In a way, it made me want to be with you more, to make you forget every fucking thing that bastard did." He paused and let out a breath, refusing to let his anger at Borden show in front of Joey, then he continued, "Anyway, afterward I went for a run to clear my head and then hit up a shower, and I was about to get dressed when I realized that you've been so worried about what I think of you, that we never even talked about me and my injuries. So I want you to see me and see _all_ of me, because it's not pretty and not everyone can handle it."

Before his injuries, Carmine had never had a problem with public nudity, after his injuries, however, he was more discreet, not out of any sort of sense of modesty, but rather to avoid shocking others around him. Today though, as he dropped his towel to the floor, baring his ass to the corridor behind him, he didn't care about anyone but Joey.

Even as that towel fell, Joey's eyes remained locked with Carmine's and he said softly, "I told you that I don't see your scars. They just don't matter to me."

In a low voice for Joey's ears only, Carmine admitted, "But they matter to _me_ , and I need to know that you're really okay with them, all of them."

Joey nodded and trailed his gaze down Carmine's neck, where the familiar ended, and he took in the whole of Carmine's ruined and puckered flesh. The burn scars covered his entire left side, front and back, and ended mid-thigh. There were thick, rubbery areas of skin that almost didn't look real. As Joey's eyes traveled downward, they fell upon Carmine's groin. His large, cut cock was quiescent, and had managed to avoid injury, although there was a patch of scarring mere centimeters away from it. Joey's eyes flicked to Carmine's thigh briefly to see more ropy scar tissue, but they were drawn back to Carmine's cock. Joey could feel the beginnings of his flush starting, but he didn't care, he was imagining hitting his knees and taking that beautiful cock in his mouth right there in the doorway for everyone to see.

The scarlet rush of color staining Joey's cheeks and the little almost-grin around Joey's mouth let Carmine know that things were okay, and as Joey continued to stare at his cock, Carmine could feel the first flickers of arousal and he teased, "If you keep staring at it, we're going to have issues."

Joey dragged his eyes away, his blush deepening. He looked up at Carmine's face and took a tentative step forward and reached up and cupped Carmine's scarred cheek in his hand. He opened his mouth to say something then closed it again. Joey only hesitated another moment before he stepped closer still and closing his eyes, pressed his mouth to Carmine's.

Carmine purposely kept his hands at his sides, and let Joey take the lead as the chaste kiss turned to passionate. They were both breathing heavy when Joey pulled back and Carmine's cock had gone from quiet and flaccid to hard and interested.

Joey whispered honestly, "I've wanted to do that since I first saw you in PT."

Carmine smiled, his ego inflating a little and he teased, "Was it worth the wait?"

Joey grinned back. "Oh, yeah."

Carmine looked around the corridor behind him, there were a few people milling around and trying to be inconspicuous as they watched the two men. He turned back to Joey and said, "As much as I don't really mind people staring at my bare ass, I think we have a lot to talk about and I'd rather do that in private."

\---------------

 

Joey nodded and stepped aside so Carmine could enter. Carmine was trying to figure out where to sit or stand to best put Joey at ease, especially given his nudity and current aroused state. He finally decided on the couch and sat down as casually as he could.

Joey's face was still flushed and he was looking at the now closed door. Carmine asked conversationally, "So I'm thinking that exhibitionism is one of your kinks."

Joey went and sat on the end of the bed facing Carmine. He answered honestly, "It used to be."

"So tell me about your dynamic, then and now," Carmine prompted.

Joey relaxed a bit and replied, "I used to really like exhibiting. Having sex in public or even just being stroked and caressed used to be an amazing turn on for me. I don't really have heavy pain kinks, but I like things like floggers and cats when they're used to tease and not cause pain. I used to enjoy... I used to like complete bondage, you know, hoods, gags, that whole thing, but I don't think I could handle that any more. You should know that I never really had any formal training, being a foster kid, and Steven..." He paused looking for Carmine's reaction.

"I don't want to know every intimate detail of your relationship with Caldwell, Joey, but you don't ever have to hesitate to mention him, I know how important he is to you, and how big a part he played in your past," Carmine replied evenly.

"Yes, sir," Joey said with a grin, then continued, "When I first met Steven, he knew I didn't have any training and he pointed me to some small training seminars that the different houses put on, and I took a few here and there. Later when I wore his collar we took a few together, and we had planned to take a couple's session at _La Petite Mort_ but we split up before we could take it."

"He mentioned to me that your dynamics just didn't mesh well enough long-term."

"Yeah, he likes S&M exhibiting just fine, but he's not really that fond of sexual exhibition or really any sort of public displays of affection. Steven's a very private man, and like I said, I used to really like it. He also had some sadistic needs that I couldn't meet, I'm just... I'm just not into pain. Eventually we were both frustrated and miserable and that's when we decided to separate."

Carmine nodded. He licked his bottom lip and said, "I trained for two full sessions at _Casa di Bella Nascosta_ in Italy. That translates to the House of Hidden Beauty. I also did a session at _La Petite Mort_ in California. I have master's standing in both houses. My needs as a top are very tame compared to most, I'm not a sadist although I'm trained in those techniques." Carmine paused and threw Joey a wicked grin. "Of course there's nothing like giving a nice open hand spanking every once in a while."

Joey grinned back and his cheeks were flaming. Carmine figured they just might permanently stay that way by the end of their conversation.

"I like being obeyed and I like completely dominating my submissives. I don't have many personal kinks. I honestly get the most enjoyment out of giving my submissive exactly what they need, I guess you could say that's my kink. I used to like exhibiting, but haven't done it since I was injured. I'm not into blood play, or play piercings or any of the extreme fringes, for me it's all about giving pleasure and not pain. Some of the fetish stuff can be fun, and role-playing can be hot. Lisa... well she had a thing for latex and we played with that quite a bit. My _Papa_ calls me a hopeless romantic that needs a sub with a pet mentality to spoil. I should warn you though that I am overly protective and I will not hesitate to hurt people to protect you. I'm also a jealous bastard that doesn't share with other tops, though I will sometimes invite a second sub to play with us if we're both interested in them. Think you can handle all that?"

Joey swallowed hard and nodded eagerly. "It sounds like we might have a good dynamic mesh, sir. But..."

"But what?" Carmine prodded.

"I still might freak out trying something or have a panic attack," Joey admitted, a little defeated, like he had been given a great present only to have someone rip it out of his hands.

Carmine patted the couch next to him. "C'mere."

Joey settled himself next to him and Carmine wrapped an arm around Joey and said, "I told you before that this thing between us isn't just about sex or dynamics, and I meant that. I want to bring you home to meet my parents and my sisters, and I want to be there in the front row when you get your diploma, and I want to take you to Italy for a real session at my pleasure house and share a mark with you. I want you in my _life_ , Joey, not just my bed. I want to collar you and build that life _with_ you, Joey."

Joey's voice was thick with trying to hold back his emotions. "Your _Papa_ was right, you _are_ a hopeless romantic."

Carmine reached over and clucked Joey's chin and teased, "I know."

"Kiss me? Please, sir," Joey asked softly.

Carmine cupped Joey's cheek with his hand and said before pressing his lips to Joey's, "At least a hundred times day from now on."

Carmine's erection came back in force as they explored each other's mouths and little did Carmine know but Joey's own cock had gotten on board with the party, though his BDU's hid the evidence.

When they pulled back and took a breath, Joey looked to Carmine's cock and asked, "May I, sir?"

Carmine nodded and opened his legs a bit further. Joey rose from the couch and gracefully went to his knees in front of Carmine. He looked up briefly and could see the lust glazing Carmine's eyes and it gave him a little confidence, but he was still hesitant.

Taking a chance, in a low commanding voice Carmine ordered, "Suck me."

It was the absolute right thing to do, and it sent a bolt of desire through Joey. Without any further hesitation he took Carmine's cock in his mouth.

Carmine's head fell back and he closed his eyes in bliss as Joey's lips and tongue worked him. Joey was making happy little sounds and it let Carmine know that the sub was getting just as much out of the experience as he was. Joey knew all the tricks, just how to hold his balls and gently press a finger right behind them, and how to use the other hand to give a squeeze and twist to his cock to accompany what his mouth was doing. It was heaven.

He let Joey steer the show and set the pace, Carmine knew that he could hold his erection as long as he wanted and there was no rush. Lazily he lifted his head and looked down. He enjoyed the show of his cock sliding in and out of Joey's perfect mouth. Joey hadn't deep-throated him, something that Carmine suddenly craved. He placed his hand gently on Joey's head and ordered, "Take it. Take it all."

Joey shifted his position a bit to do so and as he did, his BDU-covered cock brushed against the couch and he came in his pants with a little groan even as he took Carmine's cock deep in his throat.

It only took a few slow of the long deep strokes for Carmine's own release to be upon him and he warned Joey, "I'm going to come now. I'm going to come in your mouth."

As the first salty spurt hit his tongue, Joey responded and took everything that Carmine gave him. It wasn't until Carmine was resting with his head thrown back and trying to calm his breathing that Joey realized that they hadn't discussed condoms. Steven had been the only person he had ever been with willingly without one, even for oral sex.

Joey rested his head on Carmine's thigh and immediately felt Carmine's fingers in his hair, gently stroking, petting.

Carmine's voice was low as he asked, "That was amazing. You okay?"

Joey turned his face and placed a light kiss on Carmine's thigh, not caring that his lips fell on rubbery scars, and replied, "Very okay, sir."

"Good," Carmine said with a grin. Then he asked, "You came too, didn't you?"

Joey swallowed and nodded against Carmine's thigh.

"Good," was Carmine's simple reply as he continued to stroke Joey's head. He purposely did not make a big deal either way even though his ego inside wanted to crow loudly about it, but he didn't want to put any undue pressure on Joey in that particular regard. They sat that way for about a half an hour, just enjoying the closeness.

Carmine shifted and sat up straighter and nudged Joey to do the same so he could see his face. He had never seen Joey look so relaxed or at peace--he was beautiful, and Carmine told him so. "You're beautiful like this, all relaxed and satisfied."

Carmine leaned down and kissed Joey, long and slow and possessive. He pulled back and promised, "I'm going to take you down like this every night, just so I can see you like this. You're so fucking perfect."

Joey shivered and was just _gone,_ high on the afterglow of an intense orgasm and being so completely and thoroughly wanted after thinking no one ever would want him again.

Carmine nudged again and said, "C'mon. You need to get out of those pants before you chafe yourself. Let's go take a shower."

Joey stood, a little wobbly on his feet, and let Carmine lead him to bathroom. Carmine started the shower and turned to Joey. He gently pulled the sub to him and claimed his mouth again and teased, "I still owe you about ninety of those today."

Carmine's hands slipped around Joey and tugged on his still-tucked in t-shirt. As his hands slipped under it to find skin, he took Joey's mouth again, distracting him from what his hands were doing. He pulled back and teased, "Eighty-nine," as he slipped Joey's t-shirt over his head.

He pulled Joey in close, reveling in the skin-to-skin contact, and he nuzzled Joey's neck and said softly, "You're safe with me, Joey. I will never hurt you. Not ever. But I want you to have a safeword, something you can use _whenever_ you need to, okay? I want you to pick something."

Joey didn't say anything right away, he just pressed himself closer to Carmine, so skin hungry he couldn't help himself. After several long minutes he looked up at Carmine with a little grin and said, "Poodle."

Carmine raised an eyebrow in amusement and repeated, "Poodle?"

"Yeah. My last foster family had one and it was the nastiest little dog. I hated that thing."

Carmine chuckled and ran his coarse hands up and down Joey's back. "Okay, poodle it is then."

He kissed Joey and said, "C'mon. Let's get under the hot water."

Carmine's hands slipped between them and deftly unbuttoned Joey's pants and moved to the waistband to hook his fingers and gently push them down. He could see the unconscious worry that his actions brought and he said quietly, "It's just me and you here, and all that's going to happen is we're going to get a little wet and soapy. We're not rushing into anything else."

Joey nodded and moved to assist Carmine in removing his pants and stood nervously naked in front of Carmine.

Carmine made a point of not making a big deal out it until they got into the shower and under the hot spray. He noticed that Joey kept his back turned away from him, an obvious effort to keep him from seeing the scars there. Joey lathered up a cloth with soap and made himself busy bathing Carmine.

Carmine had turned his own back to Joey so he could scrub it and Joey admitted sheepishly as he washed Carmine's shoulders, "These were the first thing I noticed about you. You walked up to the front of the group in that black t-shirt and all I saw were your shoulders."

Carmine turned around with a grin. He took the soapy cloth from Joey's hands and re-lathered it. He gestured with a finger for Joey to turn around. He saw Joey set his jaw tensely, but complied with Carmine's command. Carmine gently scrubbed Joey's back, working very hard to not get angry at his first in-person view of Joey's back. He could feel the tension building in Joey and he said as he ran the soapy cloth over Joey's skin, "I saw you for the first time back at the SGC, you were in he hallway and had your nose stuck in a data pad. My first thought was _Christ, he's fucking gorgeous_ , then I was so surprised that you weren't wearing a collar I couldn't stop staring at your bare neck."

Carmine bent his neck and brushed his lips over the side of Joey's neck and teased, "This neck, right here."

Carmine slipped his arms under Joey's and pulled him back against him and proceeded to continue his scrubbing on Joey's front. As his hands drifted lower, the tension was back in Joey and Carmine whispered near his ear, "You don't have to hide from me, not ever."

"I know. I'm just... embarrassed."

"You never have to be embarrassed, not about this. Besides, you gave my ego an enormous boost by coming just from blowing me earlier. Huge boost."

Joey snorted wryly, "I can't control if or when I do, just so you know."

"I know, Beckett told me. So I'm going to make our first rule. Are you listening?" Carmine dropped the cloth and cupped Joey's flaccid cock gently with his soapy hand.

With a sharp intake of breath, Joey said, "Yes...sir."

"Rule number one, you will come as often as you're able and you won't try to hold it off, but I want to know when you're going to come, so you're going to tell me each and every time. Got it?"

Carmine was softly stroking Joey's cock as he spoke and was pleased when Joey arched back against him and tried to press his cock harder into his hand.

"Got it, sir."

Joey wasn't getting hard in the least that Carmine could feel and he asked gently, "Can you come from this?"

Joey let out a little moan and replied, "I don't think so, sir, but it feels really good anyway."

Carmine chuckled. "Nice. You need to tell me when I'm doing something you like, at least 'til we get to know each other better, alright?"

"Mmm, yes, sir." Joey barely managed to breathe out as Carmine tightened his grip a bit and stroked a little harder.

Carmine amused himself by tormenting Joey's neck with his teeth and mouth while his hand continued to stroke Joey's still-soft cock.

Carmine always enjoyed the responses of the submissives he topped, and he liked finding the things the things that turned them on the most. With Joey, it seemed to just be the simplest of Carmine's caresses and the plain skin to skin contact that had been so devoid in his life since Borden that made Joey the neediest. Carmine grinned against Joey's neck at the thought, he could give Joey as much of that as he would ever want.

Waterlogged, they reluctantly left the shower a while later. The wariness was back again as Joey realized that there was no way he could stand where Carmine wouldn't clearly see his back, he would either see it head-on or as a reflection in the mirrored walls. Carmine saw his distress and said, "Joey, I already know it's there. You don't have to try to hide, remember? It's just me here."

Joey saw the honesty and affection in Carmine's eyes. That made him feel a little braver and he nodded as he found a more natural position to stand in to dry himself off.

Carmine caught glimpses of the scars on Joey's back, but he kept his expression neutral. He could order Joey to just turn around and be done with it, but it wouldn't be productive. He wanted Joey to know that he accepted them as part of him, that they didn't matter in the grand scheme. He could best do that by just ignoring them.

Playfully Carmine rolled up his towel and looped it around the back of Joey's neck and pulled him in closer so he could kiss him.

His stomach growled loudly in the middle of the kiss and Joey looked at the noisy interloper with a silly little smile. Carmine grinned back and said, "I missed lunch. It's been sort of a busy day."

Joey got out, "I'm s..." before Carmine's fingers on his lips shushed him.

"I know, " Carmine said. "So I don't think I actually asked you. I want to collar you, will you accept a collar from me?"

Joey trembled at the question but his words were clear and strong as he replied, "I would be honored to wear your collar, sir."  
  
Carmine pulled him back in for a long possessive kiss then said, "Now that we've got that out of the way. I think you should get dressed and lend me a pair of sweats so I can get back to my quarters and get some clothes without being bare-assed for the masses. Then we're going go find a supply rat that's got a stash of collars, and after that it's going to be food and a big nap together."

Joey blushed and with an odd little grin said, "Yes, sir."

Carmine caught it and asked, "What's that look for?"

Shyly Joey replied, "I miss sleeping with someone."

Carmine reached over and ruffled Joey's wet hair. He admitted honestly, "Me too."  
  
\---------------

After they dressed, they both had a chuckle over the sight of Joey's too-short sweat pants on Carmine's long legs, and Carmine the bad ass Navy SEAL in a "Property of the United States Air Force" t-shirt.

They headed for the other tower where Carmine's quarters were housed and had just gotten off the transporter when they saw Colonel Sheppard walking towards them in the corridor.

Both men straightened and Sheppard addressed them, "Commander, Sergeant."

Carmine replied for them both, "Colonel."

Sheppard looked first at Carmine then briefly to Joey and back to Carmine. With a knowing grin - the news of Carmine's little hallway skin show had quickly made the rounds - he asked Carmine, "So should I assume that the issues in our earlier discussion have been resolved, Commander?"

"Affirmative, Sir."

"Good. Glad to hear it. Carry on, gentlemen."  
  
"Thank you, sir."

Colonel Sheppard had taken a few steps past them in the hall when Carmine called after him. "Sir?"

Sheppard paused and turned. "Commander?"

Carmine gestured vaguely in the air towards his neck and asked, "Collars, sir?"

"Ah, see Sergeant Hawkins, he should have something in the lines of a leather field collar that will get you by until you can order something from Earth."

"Thank you, Sir."

Sheppard looked to Joey for a moment, the sub was demurely standing next to the big SEAL. He wasn't meeting Sheppard's eyes, but his entire demeanor was relaxed and stress free, and there was a charming flush to his face and a little smile playing at the corners of his mouth. It all told Sheppard that Olsen was happy with the outcome. He nodded once at Carmine and then continued on his way.

\---------------

As it turned out, they wouldn't be needing Sergeant Hawkins' services after all. When they entered Carmine's quarters there was small flat box on his table with a note on top of it.

Carmine picked up the note, knowing it had to be from Adrian or Ramon, as no one else would have entered his quarters uninvited.

_Carmine,_

_Call it a gut feeling or something, man, but I brought this with us hoping you'd find someone. Joey's good for you, and I think you're good for him, so do it right and make Joey family. You know I like him and Adrian adores him, and so will the rest of the clan._

_Ramon_

_PS- Adrian got you both some food, it's in the cooling unit._

Carmine smiled at the note, reminded yet again how blessed he was with family. He opened the box to see a beautiful hand-crafted collar nestled in some tissue. It was similar in craftsmanship to the one that Adrian wore every day, and there was no doubt that it had been made by Ramon's brother Luis. Luis was a skilled silversmith who lived in Arizona. Carmine traced a gentle finger over the hand-hammered links and pieces of turquoise worked into the design. It was, as was all of Luis' work, stunning, and Carmine couldn't think of a submissive that deserved such a beautiful collar more than Joey.

He turned to Joey with the box in his hands, and said with a smile, "Ramon left us a present."

Joey had been trying to casually look at some of the multitude of photos that were around the room. It was the first time he had been in Carmine's private domain and he was curious.

Joey stepped closer and drew in a sharp breath at the sight of the beautiful collar. "That's... it's beautiful. It looks a little like Adrian's."

Carmine laid the box back on the table and picked up the key and unlocked the collar as he said, "Ramon's brother, Luis makes them. He's got a shop in Arizona."

Carmine held an end of the open collar in each hand and asked Joey, "Shall we?"

Joey's eyes flicked from the collar back to Carmine and he asked hesitantly, giving Carmine one final out, "Are you sure, sir, even with everything about me?"

Carmine leaned in over the collar and kissed Joey and said firmly, "I have never been so fucking sure of anything in my whole life, Joey."

Joey opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again in favor of simply hitting his knees in front of Carmine and bowing his neck.

With sure hands Carmine placed the collar around Joey's neck, his nimble fingers securing the lock. It was with that final click of the lock that Carmine felt any remaining worry he had about Joey dissipate. He was confident that he _was_ the patient and understanding Dom that Joey needed to rebuild his shattered self-image, and now with his collar in place he could also protect Joey like he deserved to be protected. Dynamics, sex and everything else would fall into place in their own time.

Carmine gently stroked Joey's head and savored the moment.

His stomach growled again, breaking the serenity and he questioned, "Hungry? The note said that Adrian filled the fridge."  
  
Joey looked up at him, and as long as Carmine lived he would never forget the look of absolute trust and adoration on his sub's face as the light played off the shiny silver now gracing his neck.

\---------------

They gratefully ate the meal that Adrian had procured for them, and they laughed seeing the extra portions of dessert in the back of the cooling unit. Adrian and Ramon both had infamous sweet tooths that they seemed to think everyone needed to share.

When they were done, Joey cleared the plates away without a word and Carmine wondered if they were going to be one of those couples that just fell into domestic bliss or if there were going to be bumps in that particular road. He and Lisa had been oil and water, he was tidy by nature and job necessity, she had been a slob. Carmine had liked warm family-style dinners and could even cook most of his favorites. Lisa hated to cook and preferred being taken out to dinner and shown off. He had enjoyed attending more family-type things like nautical festivals, movies, and even amusement parks with his nieces and nephews. Lisa had wanted to go clubbing and attend society functions. The more he thought about it now in retrospec, he could see what his family had seen. His mother had called her shallow and a snob and a gold-digger, and the _only_ thing his _Mamma_ had given Lisa any credit for was that she would have given Carmine beautiful children.

As he mused to himself, Carmine could see Joey looking at some of the pictures he had around his quarters. He couldn't imagine not having anyone to call family. He smiled thinking that Joey no longer had that problem, he just didn't know it yet.

"Hey, grab that photo album over there and let's stretch out. I'll give you a tour of the family tree."

Carmine went to the bed and moved the pillows up to the headboard so they could get comfortable. Joey brought the album over and took off his boots before climbing into bed to sit next to Carmine underneath the welcoming arm he had raised.

The very first picture was that of a beautiful scenic long distance shot of a vineyard in a fertile valley. It was gorgeous shot that belonged in a travel brochure.

"Well, that's home."  
  
"What?" Joey asked, a little confused.

"I grew up there."

"In that town?"

Carmine chuckled. "No, in that vineyard."

Carmine turned the page of the album and there were more photos of the vineyard, its modern winery, and a near mansion-sized ranch house on the property.

Joey asked curiously, "Your parents work there?"

"In a way, I guess. My folks _own_ it. Look, I know we haven't really talked a whole lot about my family, just that there's a lot of us, but there are a few things you should know. We're not... filthy rich exactly, more like very well off. My family has owned that vineyard in California for over a hundred years. It's done well and our family has made a good living from it for several generations now. The Picone name is held in pretty high regard in the area, too, and my _Papa_ is on the city council, like my grandfather was before him.

Joey was intently studying the pictures and tried to imagine what it would have been like to grow up in such a place with parents and family that loved him.

Carmine hesitated a moment before sharing, "I don't normally let people know too much about the vineyard and that whole being well off thing. It gives people the wrong idea sometimes."

Joey nodded and replied, "There are a lot of subs out there that would do anything to be collared by someone with money."

Carmine snorted, "Don't I know it, and my _Mamma_ can see them coming a mile away. She is not shy about calling them gold-diggers to their faces either."  
  
Joey frowned and said quietly, "She's probably going to think that about me, given my background and how fast this has all sort of come about."

"Actually, I think she's going to take to you like a long-lost son. She'll tuck you under her wing and drag you to the kitchen and stuff you full of whatever she's got cooking on the stove while she's gibbering at you a hundred miles an hour about people you don't even know."

"Really?"

"Yup, and _Papa_ will find some subtle way to rescue you and drag you out to his workshop so he can show you all of his little projects. He could spend days out there tinkering."

Joey grinned but Carmine could still see the doubt lingering and said, "Joey, you are the most non-materialistic sub I've ever met. The only time you even mentioned money or spending it was when you were talking about picking your graduate school and what you thought you could afford. Which, by the way, is no longer an issue, you're going to pick the school that you like the best regardless of cost, but we'll talk about that some other time. What I'm trying to say, Joey, is that I didn't think for even one second that you were one of those subs. Not one fucking second. Okay?"

Joey nodded. "I'm sorry. I've just heard it before, when I wore Steven's collar. People assumed that because I was a foster kid that I was only with him for money and prestige and helping my career."

"If anyone says anything to you directly or indirectly this time, I want to know. I will not tolerate you or the validity of your collaring being disrespected, got it?"

"Got it, sir."

"Good," Carmine said and turned the page of the album, "Oh, look, speaking of _Mamma_ and _Papa_...."

Page by page they went through the album with Carmine sharing tidbits and funny stories about nearly everyone. There were a lot of pictures of Carmine and Adrian as kids and growing up into young men. The two men were the same age and Joey found it interesting to watch them grow up together in pictures to become the men he knew.

Carmine ran a finger absently over a picture of the two of them grab-assing at the beach as teenagers. He smiled, lost in the memory, and said softly, "Don't tell him I said so, but he really _is_ my favorite cousin."

Joey shot Carmine a quick grin, and teased, "We'd _never_ hear the end of it."

Carmine chuckled and closed the album. He squeezed Joey a little closer with the arm around his shoulder and reached over to lay his other hand on Joey's wrist and softly stroke it with his thumb. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headboard, just savoring the sensations.

\---------------

 

Carmine woke in that same position with a start an hour later to Joey giving his arm a little shake and saying, "Sir, wake up. Your back won't like you in the morning."

Carmine cracked an eye and looked over at Joey and grunted in agreement. The two men got up and took care of their bathroom needs before shutting off the lights in the room and heading back towards the bed, where Joey had turned the covers down. Carmine shucked the borrowed t-shirt and sweats that he had never bothered to change out of and stood there with an expectant look on his face.

Joey blushed and quickly peeled off his own clothing. They crawled under the smooth sheets and Carmine spooned around Joey possessively, wrapping his arms tightly around him and entwining their legs. Sighing contently, Carmine was asleep again almost immediately. He hadn't had any the night before as he had sat in the infirmary next to Joey's bed. He was tired physically and mentally.

Joey lay there awake for a long time with his fingers gently rubbing little circles on the strong arm that Carmine had wrapped around him. His whole life had changed in the past twenty-four hours. He had never allowed himself to hope that he would have this again, that he would find someone who didn't look at him like he was broken and defective. The weight of the collar on his neck was reassuring, as was the way Carmine was using him as his own personal teddy bear. He could feel Carmine's soft cock pressing against his ass, not demanding or ready to cause blood and pain like Borden, rather it was just another beautiful part of an altogether beautiful man. As Joey finally drifted off to sleep himself, he vowed that he would do everything he could to get to a place where he would be able to welcome that beautiful cock inside him.

\---------------

Carmine woke to the first fingers of dawn breaking through the window. Somehow in the night he ended up on his back with Joey plastered half on top of him. He blinked and tried to figure out exactly what had woken him up. It only took a moment for him to realize that Joey was apparently dreaming, and by way he was rubbing against Carmine, it was an erotic dream.

With a sleepy grin, and an all too pleased with himself expression, Carmine bent his neck and pressed a kiss to Joey's temple as he shifted a little on the bed.

The movement woke Joey and in the dim light of the breaking dawn, Carmine could see the mortified look on Joey's face when he realized what he had been doing.

"Don't stop on my account," Carmine murmured with a reassuring grin.  
  
"I'm sorry," Joey said in a low voice.

Carmine rolled over on his side, facing Joey, his own very interested cock between them. He ran his hand gently down Joey's chest to his stomach and paused as he asked, "What were you dreaming about?"

"You standing in the hallway yesterday," Joey admitted shyly.

Carmine's hand drifted down to find Joey's cock. It wasn't what anyone would call an impressive erection, but for Joey, it was as hard as he could possibly get. Carmine wrapped his hand around it and said, "So me standing around naked gets you hard?"

Joey moaned and pressed harder into Carmine's hand. "God, yes, sir."  
  
"So, what else were we doing in this dream?" Carmine prodded as he slowly worked Joey's cock.

"I was... ahh... sucking you, sir."

"Mmm, you like the idea of my cock in your mouth with everyone watching, don't you?" Carmine asked as he shifted a bit and aligned his cock with Joeys and wrapped his big hand around both.

Joey was too wrapped up in what was happening physically to answer and Carmine let him be. He pressed closer still and began tormenting Joey's ear with his tongue.

Joey bucked against him in a counter-rhythm to his own stroking and gentle pelvic thrusts. They were in perfect sync and Carmine wasn't surprised when Joey soon gasped and cried out, "I'm coming, sir, oh please, I'm coming."

Carmine stilled for a brief moment to let Joey move against him as he wanted. A full-on shiver went through Joey's entire body and with a sharp gasp from Joey, Carmine felt a hot wetness seep into his hand. When Joey's trembling had eased a bit, Carmine claimed his mouth in a fierce kiss and with only a couple of more strokes added his own contribution to the sticky mess in his hand.

Carmine was immensely pleased, both with himself, and with Joey. The huge leaps of trust Joey had taken with him since yesterday were not lost on him. He kissed Joey's forehead and closed his eyes for a moment, basking in the warm feeling that Joey's trust in him elicited and a post-orgasmic afterglow.

He forced himself not to open his eyes and stay where he was when Joey's whispered, "I'll get a washcloth."

A minute later, he returned with a couple of warm washcloths and efficiently wiped down Carmine's softening cock with one, then used the other on Carmine's hand. When he was done, Carmine felt Joey's lips press a kiss to his palm then say, "That's the first time I've come by anyone else's hand since..."

Carmine sat up and pulled Joey into his arms. With his face tucked near Joey's ear, Carmine promised, "You and I are going to have a lot of first times, and they're all going to be just as good as that one."

\---------------

They dozed for another hour before getting up, dressing, and heading for breakfast.

As they walked, Carmine brought up another topic. "I like the view from your quarters better, but my whole team's quarters are together and I think I'd rather us stay in mine."

Joey nodded. "I assumed you would, sir, mine are also in the middle of the enlisted quarters. But I think we should requisition a second desk."

It was Carmine's turn to nod. "I agree, you definitely need your own space to study and work. I'll take care of that and we'll recruit Ramon and Adrian to help move your stuff."

The got into the transporter and Carmine said, "Speaking of my team, I know you're comfortable with Ramon and that you met the others at dinner before, but things will be... different with them now that you're wearing my collar. My team is my second family and we all look out for each other and that includes our collared partners. I trust each and every one of them without question, Joey, and I know that doesn't come easy for you, but if you ever find that you need help and I'm not here for whatever reason, you _can_ trust them. They will protect you like their own and I do the same for their submissives."

"Ramon said that SEALs look out for their own."

"Yes, we do, and god help anyone that fucks with one of ours."

"I'll remember that, sir."

Carmine reached over and rubbed Joey's back affectionately and replied, "Good."

Carmine hadn't removed his hand from Joey's back when they left the transporter and Joey was acutely aware of it on the small of his back as they entered the mess hall.

 

They spied Adrian and Ramon over near the windows and made their way over there.

Adrian stood, and without asking permission of anyone, wrapped Joey in a bear hug and said happily, "Welcome to the family."

Ramon and Carmine shared a look and rolled their eyes. Adrian was eternally hopeless, but they loved him anyway.

Ramon held out his hand with a grin. "Congratulations, man."

Carmine shook it and replied, "Thanks. And, thanks for the collar, it's perfect."

Ramon glanced over to the silver around Joey's neck and nodded. "He deserves it."

\---------------

After a hasty breakfast, Joey and Carmine headed for the infirmary. Carson had insisted that he wanted to see Joey for a quick check before releasing him back to his duties.

The smile that crossed Carson's face was wide and genuine as he took in the sight of the collar around Joey's neck. He had fretted to himself about the two men all night and was glad that things appeared to have worked out after all.

Carson directed the two men to a private exam room, and Joey hopped up on a bed. Carson looked to Carmine and asked, "May I, Commander?"

Carmine nodded, and Carson efficiently completed Joey's cursory exam.

"You're right as rain this morning, Sergeant. No reason you can not return to your duties." He turned towards Carmine and continued, "First, let me offer my heartfelt congratulations on your pairing, I was worried about you both last night. Second, SGC policy requires a monthly physical for all collared submissives, so we'll need to get that scheduled."

"Things probably wouldn't have worked out quite so well without your help, Doc, and we both really appreciate it. As far as the physical goes, will that be with you personally?" Carmine asked.

"Aye, unless it's a medical emergency, I will be handling all of the Sergeant's medical needs myself."

"Good, I think we'd both prefer it that way," Carmine replied, and Joey nodded his vehement agreement.

"Not a problem. Now, I know yesterday was... a big day for you both. Do I need to perform a more thorough exam this morning?" He looked to Joey and added, "Do you have any pain or open areas on your skin? Any anal soreness or bleeding?"

Joey flushed scarlet and dropped his eyes to the floor. Carmine could see Joey's distress and stepped closer to lay a warm hand on the back of Joey's neck. He answered Carson neutrally, "Doc, just for your own information, I'm not a sadist, not in the least. I don't get off on causing the people I top pain, it's just not my thing. We did play a little, but there were no restraints or toys used, and there was no penetration."

Carson opened his mouth to ask something else then closed it again. Carmine raised an eyebrow in near-amusement and answered the unspoken question, "Yes, he did. Twice actually, once last night and again early this morning."

"Thank you for being so forthright, Commander."

Carson turned back to Joey and asked gently, "Was there any pain or burning when you became aroused or ejaculated, Sergeant? Anything I should be concerned about?"

"No, sir. None at all."

'Good, but I expect you to let me know immediately if you do, all right?"

"Yes, sir."

Carson turned back to Carmine and said, "Now Sergeant Olsen has been seeing Dr. Emily Johnson, one of our psychologists. She's a documented submissive herself and he's indicated that's he's very comfortable with her and does not wish to switch therapists. Will you be making any changes regarding that?"

Carmine shook his head, "No. He trusts her and I see no reason to change things. And for the record, if it would help Joey, I would be more than willing to do some joint sessions with him."

"Excellent. I will pass that information along to her when I notify her of Sergeant Olsen's change in status."

Carson's trained eye could see the way that Joey's entire body relaxed with Carmine's hand on his neck. It was good sign in Carson's book, as was the fact that Joey had achieved an orgasm not once but twice with the Commander in the past day. It all boded very well for their relationship as well as Olsen's self-esteem.

"Well then, you are all set, Sergeant. I'll update both your records to show that you are now Commander Picone's collared submissive. And it should go without saying, but I'll say it again for the record, if either of you have questions I can answer, please don't hesitate to ask."

\---------------

Carmine walked Joey all the way to the balcony of the control room. It was starting to get busy with teams gearing up to head off world.

Carmine surprised Joey by pulling him in close and kissing him long, slow, and possessively right there in front of everyone. He left absolutely no room for doubt as to whose collar Joey was now wearing.

With an amused smiled on his face he reluctantly let go of Joey and ordered playfully, "Go on and get to work, I've got a briefing to get to."

Joey flushed just like Carmine knew that he would and he nodded and replied, "Yes, sir."

Joey turned and headed down the stairs. Just before he turned the corner to head to his work area, he looked back up at the balcony, and as his fingertips found his collar, he flashed Carmine a quick smile.

Carmine nodded once and turned to head back for the transporter.

\---------------

Someone fell into step with Carmine and he wasn't surprised to see Master Chief Frost.

As the doors closed behind them in the transporter, Frost said, "Congratulations, Commander."

"Thank you, Master Chief," Carmine replied respectfully. Even though he outranked him, Frost was a SEAL, a brother, and that more than transcended rank.

"Just for my own information, will you both be settling into Sergeant Olsen's quarters, Commander, or yours?"

"Mine, to be near my team."

Frost grinned and said, "That's I what I suspected your answer would be. We take care of our own, Commander."  
  
"Yes, we do, Master Chief. Speaking of our own, how is Doctor Taylor settling in?"

"Very well, thank you for asking. Dr. Weir has him doing some interesting work that fits well with his education and he's finding it challenging and interesting. Plus there is practically an unlimited supply of new things for him study in the Ancient database."  
  
"That's good to hear. Please give him my regards and remind him that we're just down the hall from you both if he ever needs us." The transporter opened and they stepped out. Carmine asked, "Are you sitting in on this briefing, Master Chief?"

Frost shook his head, he hadn't specifically been invited and queried, "Which briefing is this, sir?"

Carmine grinned. "We're going for a swim tomorrow."

Frost raised an eyebrow in question and Carmine explained. "We're going to gear up and take a dive under the city. Pictures and schematics are one thing, but we all want a nice clear visual in our heads as to what the underneath of this city looks like and what the environment down there is really like just in case we need to do some diving in an attack scenario."

Frost got a wistful look in his eye at the thought of a dive and Carmine grinned and teased, "You're welcome to join us, Master Chief, the more the merrier. "

Frost grinned back and said, "I just might take you up on that, Commander."  
  
\---------------

Steven watched the two personal messages he had received via subspace communication and got up and pulled a bottle of very old and seldom drunk bourbon out of the cupboard. He poured himself three fingers and sat back down in front of his laptop again and tapped a key.

Joey's face filled the screen again and Steven's eyes couldn't help but focus on the gorgeous silver collar now gracing Joey's neck.

When Joey began speaking on-screen, Steven really looked at him and he could see a light in the sub's eyes that had been missing for entirely too long.

"Steven, I wish I was having this conversation with you in person but maybe... maybe it's better this way. You told me that if I found someone to give them a chance, to try to trust someone again. Well I took that chance, and I accepted a collar from Commander Picone." Joey flashed a happy grin to him on the screen and continued, "You were right when you said he and I just might be good for each other, I really think we are. He doesn't treat me like I'm broken and he's taking everything slowly, at my pace. Our dynamic fit is good, really good actually, and I'm remembering how to enjoy being a submissive, if that makes any sense."

Joey paused on-screen for a moment then said, "Carmine and I had a long talk about you and he accepts that you are the closest thing to family that I have and that you are very important to me. He wants you to have dinner with us when you're back in Pegasus, I think he wants to put you at ease by showing you how we are in private."

Joey swallowed hard and a little sadness crossed the sub's face as he continued, "Steven, this is probably... actually I _know_ this is hurting you and I'm sorry. Sometimes I feel like all I do is break your heart. I wish you had someone with you, someone who would take care of you and love you, and that fits with you perfectly in all the ways I couldn't. So I want you to promise _me_ something this time, I want you to promise me that you'll stop carrying around my collar and those damn rings, because I'd bet a year's pay that they're behind you in your underwear drawer, and I want you to find someone who makes you happy. Please. Do this for me. Because no matter what happens in the future, I've loved you in one way or another since the day I met you and I don't want you to be alone."

Steven lifted his glass and let some of the smooth liquor slide down his throat. He tapped another key and Picone's face once again filled the screen.

"Colonel. I know Joey sent you his own message but I wanted keep the air clear between us. Joey accepted my collar. And yes, I know all about Borden and what exactly he did to Joey. Normally I wouldn't feel the need to justify myself to anyone but I want _you_ to know that none of it matters to me, not his scars, and certainly not his other injuries. I want and accept him exactly the way he is with no reservations. I'm going to work hard every single day to earn his trust and the gifts he gives me."

There was no hesitancy on Picone's part, and the strength of his conviction was evident in his tone.

"I love him, Steven. I haven't told him that yet, but it's that simple. And I'm telling you all this because I know that you do, too, and that you worry about him. I'd like to invite you to have dinner with us when you arrive back here, but I'll understand if you're uncomfortable with that. I've also thought long and hard about what I'm about to say next. Normally, I'm a possessive bastard that would never let my collared submissive be alone with another Dom socially, but I've decided that if you and Joey wish to continue your occasional visits and dinners alone that I will allow it. I trust him completely and I trust you. I just don't think it would be good for Joey for me to forbid it. He considers you family, Steven, and in my world there isn't anything more important than that. I'm going to sign off on that note, but I'm sure we'll talk when you reach Atlantis."

The video recording ended and Steven sat there staring at the blank screen for a long time. He brought his glass to his lips and finished off his bourbon. He stood up with the intention of pouring himself more, but instead found himself standing in front of the drawers in his sleeping area. He opened up his top drawer and moved his crisply folded white undershirts aside to reveal a flat, hinged wooden box. He hesitated only a moment before picking it up and opening it.

Nestled inside it on navy blue velvet were Joey's collars, all three of them. His leather work collar was well-worn and broken-in, it had been the one that Joey had worn the most. The burnished white gold everyday collar had seen more use when they were off duty than on, and as Steven ran a thumb over its thick links, he could still remember the way it had felt so heavy in his hands has he put it on Joey for the first time on that ski trip. The dress collar was a nod to the expected, neither he or Joey had wanted some elaborate diamond encrusted dress collar but Joey had needed one that would be more appropriate with his dress uniform, so they had compromised and found one that was very classy without being showy. Joey had only worn it a few times.

The two gold rings lying in the center of them all had never been worn by anyone. Heavy gold, with an inlaid braid detail, the sturdy rings had been picked out to last a lifetime, but instead they had been the catalyst to their separation.

As he stared at those rings, Steven thought to himself that Joey was right, he needed to move forward and stop holding onto the past and onto the hope that the life with Joey that he had planned would ever come to fruition. He certainly hadn't been celibate since their split, but neither had he allowed anyone to really get close to him and hadn't allowed himself any emotional attachments.

He closed the box gently and locked it. With the box still in hand he closed the drawer and moved over towards his desk where a small packing crate held books and other things he was sending to his storage unit when they next reached Earth, and with a wince he carefully placed the box in the crate.

\---------------

Carmine had been right about them falling into domestic bliss very quickly. Joey had a strong caregiver streak that showed in the way he enjoyed puttering around their quarters taking care of meals, laundry, and various and sundry other little things.

It took Carmine a little getting used to in truth, he knew that Joey worked just as hard as he did every day, some days harder in fact, and he made it very clear to Joey that there wouldn't be any repercussions if he skipped the chores when he was tired or needed to study.

Joey, on the other hand, was thrilled. He had a natural knack for managing his time and he honestly enjoyed making sure that their quarters weren't just a place to sleep and shower, but rather he made it their sanctuary away from the pressure and endless insanity of their mission.

With food in the cupboard and company he adored coming to, Carmine felt like he almost had a home--a real home. Lisa had never made any effort to make a home for them. The apartments they had shared had been maintained by a cleaning lady and decorated in bold, modern styles, Lisa's styles more precisely.

Carmine carefully held together two pieces of the model car he was working on at his desk and looked over to where Joey was sorting out clean laundry on the bed. Joey had his mp3 player on and was listening to a recorded lecture for his class as he put away their clean clothes. Carmine grinned at the sight of Joey dressed only in his collar and a pair of old faded jeans, his feet and torso bare. Although the sight of a half-dressed Joey would always make him grin, in truth it was more the idea that after only a little over a week of wearing his collar Joey was comfortable in his own skin around Carmine.

Joey put away the last of their clothes and turned off the mp3 player. He grimaced as he removed his earbuds.

He stepped over to his own desk next to Carmine's and dropped the mp3 player there. He turned to face Carmine and laid his hand on Carmine's shoulder and said, "They should use that lecture as a cure for insomnia."

Carmine chuckled. "That good, huh?"

"It gives new meaning to boring," Joey said as he inspected Carmine's progress on the model of a 1950 Ford pickup truck. "This is coming out really good. Have you been making models a long time?"

"Been doing them since I was a kid. It's relaxing."

"Your father teach you?"

"Yeah, we'd spend hours when I was younger. _Papa_ still buys me a new kit for Christmas every year."  
  
"It's nice that you have that with him. It can be something you pass on to your own children some day."

Carmine carefully released the pieces he had been holding and swiveled his chair around to face Joey. He opened his legs and pulled Joey closer and looked up at him. The wistful tone in Joey's voice about having a father and children wasn't lost on Carmine. "I'm sorry you don't have any good memories like that. Growing up in foster homes the way you did... I just can't imagine it."

Joey's hands were warm on his shoulders and his thumbs were making little swirling motions on Carmine's skin. "And I can't imagine growing up like you did. But don't think my life was all bad. There were a few foster families that were actually pretty good, the Bradleys for one. I lived with them for about eight months when I was ten. Mr. Bradley taught me a little about tools and he gave me this old lawn tractor to tinker with"

Carmine grinned. "Sounds like something my father would do to keep us from taking apart something important."  
  
Joey nodded. "Exactly, but Mr. Bradley had a good laugh though, because by the end of summer I had the old one running better than his new one."

"So, you're naturally mechanically inclined?"

Joey teased as he let his fingers dig into the muscles of Carmine's neck. "Yep, I'm naturally good with my hands."

Carmine responded with a groan of agreement. He dropped his forehead to rest on Joey's bare stomach and let himself enjoy the impromptu massage for a couple of minutes.

Carmine's face was still facing the floor when he broached gently, "So that's something we haven't talked about."

"What's that, sir?"

"Us, kids."

"Oh."

Carmine sat up and tugged Joey down into his lap and said, "Do you like kids? Want kids? Someday I mean, not right now obviously, we're both committed out here for at least the rest of the one year deployment I agreed to. But would you want me to collar a woman who would give us both children when we're back on Earth?"

The one uncompromising thing that both men each demanded from the other was honesty. Joey knew this and though he hesitated a bit, answered Carmine. "I like kids and I had always dreamed of having a family of my own someday. Steven and I had planned to find a surrogate. And after he and I split up, I actually started the process to become a foster parent myself with the idea of permanently adopting one or two. But then I ended up deployed for a while to Germany then California and with all the bouncing around I had to put everything on hold. Then when I was finally in a stable place deployment-wise at the SGC, Borden happened. Now I'm out here. I guess I just sort of thought I would have to let go of the idea of having a family of my own."

Carmine's hand was gently stroking Joey's thigh and he replied, "I never wanted a houseful like most of my family, but I think a couple'd be great, especially a daughter. I really want a little girl I can spoil like a princess. I do like your idea of adopting, too, there are just too many kids out there that need a real home. So I guess we're good on this, and just have to be a little more settled, yeah?"

"Yeah," Joey said with a grin, looking like he had just opened another in a long line of great gifts.

Carmine claimed Joey's mouth with his own, teasing and turning them both on. When he pulled back, he had a teasing glint in his eyes and he said, "Let's play."

Joey flushed and replied as he stood up, "Your will is mine, sir." He moved towards the bed and removed his jeans and boxers and knelt gracefully awaiting Carmine's instructions.

Carmine went to their toy box in the corner and removed a few new things he had added just yesterday at Dr. Johnson's suggestion. He moved over to the open section of wall with its conveniently placed eye bolts and attached the two loops of soft rope to them. The loops hung loosely down from the bolts by almost a foot, and with Joey's hands slipped through them, they would give him something to strain and pull against the same as any normal cuff would, but they would also not cause Joey to panic like the thought of traditional bondage did because he could easily get out of them.

He then took four small metal blocks and pressed them to the floor. The floor self-attached the blocks in the same way that the walls almost magically took in hooks. Two of the blocks were spaced shoulder width apart, the other two separated from them by a few inches--just enough for a foot. The blocks would again give Joey a sense of bondage and act as a spreader bar would, but was easy for him to get out of should it be panic inducing. These improvised restraints were a first step into as-yet uncharted territory in their new relationship.

\---------------

He pulled off his t-shirt and ordered Joey, "C'mere."

Carmine watched as Joey approached, he could see that Joey was curious but not tense or afraid and he took that as a good sign.

He took Joey's hands in his and kissed him playfully. "We're going to have fun. What's your safeword?"

Joey nodded and replied in a confident voice, "Poodle, sir."

"Good. Ready? It's just me here."

Joey nodded again and Carmine gently nudged him so his back was to the wall. He bent and placed Joey's feet between the blocks, pleased at how open and accessible it made Joey. He stood and could see that Joey had his eyes closed and was breathing in very slow controlled breaths. There was still no tension in Joey's body though, and Carmine proceeded to place each of Joey's arms in a loop.

Carmine trailed his hand down Joey's chest and whispered, " _Così bella_."

He stepped back and watched Joey intently for a moment, looking for signs of distress--and was pleased that there were none. Joey hands were loosely closed, but not fisted, and his eyes were closed and his head was bowed in that demure way that went straight to Carmine's dick. Joey was simply relaxed and waiting.

Carmine turned back to the toy box with a grin. He rooted around and came up with a couple favorites of his, things that would be perfect for this first time, one a dry natural loofah mitten that was rough and a little scratchy, and the other a fur mitt, the loofah's polar opposite. He figured that between the two he would have Joey begging in minutes.

Carmine knew that there wasn't anything in the toy box that should be panic inducing. The two of them going through everything together had been one of Dr. Johnson's first suggestions. They had sat down and done exactly that the second night Joey wore his collar. Carmine had been both pleased and relieved that other than a crop that had been quickly gotten rid of, Joey had actually been excited about the toy box contents overall. There was even a soft suede flogger that Joey hadn't wanted to get rid of, but had asked for a little more time to work up to it.

Carmine's toy box held a lot of the expected, but there were certain things that made Joey grin and chuckle as they went through them, things like a kitchen cookie cutter wheel, a little toy truck with hard nubby tires, and even what appeared to be the stretchy plastic net bag that onions came in at the grocery store. Carmine's nimble fingers were always finding tactile things, and he enjoyed figuring out how to use even the most mundane, everyday items to tease and stimulate his submissives.

With the two mitts in hand Carmine stepped over to Joey and in short order, just as he knew that they would, the two competing textures of the mitts had Joey aroused and moaning and straining in pleasure against his bonds.

Over and over Carmine dragged the two mitts all over Joey's hypersensitive skin, until Joey was trembling so hard that Carmine thought he might just fly apart. Carmine deftly dropped the mitts and leaned in to claim Joey's mouth in a long deep kiss as he stepped closer to press Joey between the wall and his own solid body, trapping their cocks together between them. Joey greedily pressed back, craving the skin on skin contact. Carmine moved his hips in a slow, steady rhythm that matched what his mouth was doing to Joey's. The warm friction was deliciously tantalizing, and was furthering both men's arousal to a whole new level.

When Carmine's strong hands slipped down between him and the wall to cup and knead his ass cheeks, Joey had a flash of the two of them in the same bondage situation, except that in this fantasy, instead of just grabbing his ass and getting the two of them off through frottage, Carmine would use those strong hands to hold him up as he slipped his beautiful cock into his ass and fucked him long and slow.

It was that thought that sent Joey over the edge. He barely had the wherewithal to pull his mouth back a bit from Carmine's and hoarsely cry out, "Coming, I'm coming."  
  
Carmine's hips never stopped, never changed rhythm, and it made Joey feel like he was going to keep coming forever.

Carmine let his own release overtake him as Joey's was waning. As they both stood there on legs that felt like jelly, Carmine couldn't have been more pleased with how Joey had responded. He kissed Joey one final time and rested his forehead against Joey's. "Well I think that went well. Perfect, actually. What do you think?"

Joey smiled dopily and answered, "That scratchy mitt is evil."

Carmine chuckled and teased, "You left it in the box, makes it fair game."

"Don't remind me."

Carmine stepped back and gently took Joey's arms out of the loops. He gave each one a brisk rub to make sure Joey's circulation was good and then led Joey to the shower.

After a slow and pampering shower, they got out and dried off. In a move that was a repeat of their very first shower together, Carmine looped his rolled up towel around Joey's neck and pulled him in close.

His expression was serious, and not his normal jovial, and he said softly, "I know what it's taking you to trust me like that, and I don't ever want you to think I lose sight of that. You're strong, probably stronger than I am to be honest, and you're beautiful and perfect, and I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that you're mine." Carmine paused and swallowed hard before continuing, "I love you."

Joey's eyes had welled up, and his own voice wavered as he replied, "I never thought I would find someone who I could trust again, that I _wanted_ to trust again until I met you. You make me feel safe, and you've given me a family that I've never had before and the promise of a wonderful future together. I'm honored to give myself to you and I do it because I love you, too."

Carmine wrapped his arms around Joey and squeezed. The emotional moment stretched and it was long after all the condensation on the bathroom mirrors had disappeared that the two men finally separated and went to bed.

\---------------

They had another week and a half of domestic bliss before the Pegasus galaxy showed its true colors. The charred remains believed to be Major Lorne and his team had been solemnly brought back to Atlantis leaving a wake of unanswered questions behind them.

When it was discovered that the remains weren't, in fact, Major Lorne and his team, Colonel Sheppard put out the order to the special ops teams to gear up and get ready to move out.

Carmine had been off world a few times since collaring Joey, but this time was different. They were not simply exploring or trying to make new friends and allies. No, this time, they were going through that gate looking for blood. Both Carmine and Joey were military and knew what that meant--it was the type of mission that not everyone necessarily came home from.

While Carmine was in a hurried briefing with the other teams and Colonel Sheppard, Joey was in his work area quadruple checking every possible piece of equipment that might be requested.

Carmine entered Joey's area fully geared up and armed. He met Joey halfway and they had matching worried expressions on their faces.

"We're dialing out in ten. I wanted to see you before we left."

"All the equipment is ready to go. And so is anything else you might dial in and ask for, I've got it all covered."

Carmine nodded and cleared his throat. "Look, this is my first combat mission since we got together. I don't want to go off and have you worrying that I'm going to do something stupid. I train very hard to make sure my team comes back in one piece, and that includes me."

Joey swallowed hard and replied, "I know."

"I don't envision any issues, with everyone being so focused on what's happening off world and the _Daedalus_ arriving in a few days, but if you have any problems, if anyone hassles you or Adrian I want you to go directly to Master Chief Frost. And I mean anything, am I clear?"

"I understand, I don't think we'll have any problems, but I'm comfortable going to the Master Chief if there are any."

"I have no idea how long we'll be out there, so don't live in this work area, okay? Make sure you eat and sleep and all that fun stuff. And spend some time with Adrian, it'll be good for both of you."

"I will, sir, I promise."

"I know you will," Carmine replied before he pulled Joey in and kissed him tenderly.

Carmine pulled back and turned to head out to the gate room. As he was walking out Corporal James was walking in and Carmine paused.

"Corporal."  
  
James straightened and replied, "Commander."

Carmine liked the piss-ant as Ramon called him. Once Corporal James and Joey had hashed out their working relationship, James found himself unexpectedly welcome among Carmine and Ramon and the rest of their team. He really wasn't a bad kid and he took it upon himself to watch out for Joey and Adrian and the other submissives of the SEALs. Other officers that had known James longer had started to comment that they noticed the positive change in him and it boded well for his future career in the Corps.

"We're heading out, Corporal, no idea when we'll be back. Keep an eye on my family for me while I'm gone?"

"Yes, sir. I always do, sir."

Carmine nodded and smirked to himself as he headed for the gateroom, the kid's heart was in the right place.

\---------------

The first day and a half the teams were gone went by very quickly for Joey, the MALPS going through the gate over and over to test possible addresses for the location of their missing people. He tried to keep himself busy so he wouldn't worry and he spent all of his free time in Adrian's company.

Joey hadn't had a top so much as look at him inappropriately since taking Carmine's collar, no one _really_ wanting to mess with the ferocious looking SEAL, but it was comforting when Master Chief Frost made a point of stopping by Joey and Adrian's table in the mess hall, visibly checking in with them.

In all of the chaos Joey had almost forgotten that he had set an appointment with a member of the Botany department on the afternoon of the second day the teams were gone. The botanists wanted to work with Joey to design a module that could be easily attached and detached from a FRED that would house fragile plant specimens in an environment that mimicked the temperature and humidity of the plant's natural habitat.

When a woman's soft voice said from behind him, "Sergeant Olsen?", Joey turned around to see an attractive red-head standing there.

"Yes, can I help you, ma'am?"

She smiled widely and Joey found himself staring. Her entire face had just lit up and he felt a little flutter in his stomach that he was hoping was just too much coffee.

"Hi, I'm Katie Brown, from the Botany department, I believe we have an appointment."

"Yes. Yes, we do, Dr. Brown. I'm sorry, I've just been a little distracted the past couple of days with all the gate activity."

Her expression sobered. "Yeah, I really hope Colonel Sheppard is able to find our people. Faking their deaths like that was just horrible. If you're busy with all that, we can certainly postpone this. The module is important, but it's not the priority right now."

"No, we can get started. I've got time now."

Her smile was back and they made themselves comfortable side-by-side at Joey's desk. Bit by bit they hashed out a rough design for the module. Katie was, without a doubt, the gentlest person Joey had ever met. Her every movement was graceful, and her laughter warm and genuine. She also had a particular scent about her, a combination of soil mixed with a melange of floral scents. Joey found himself distracted by it.

As she leaned even closer to redraw a section of the sketch she accidentally brushed against him. He had to contain his surprise as he felt the first tingles of arousal starting. He had never found a woman sexually attractive before. Carmine had been wholly shocked when Joey had shared with him that he had never been with a woman in his life. He had been embarrassed but Carmine had defused it in his ever-lighthearted way by telling Joey that he obviously hadn't met the right woman yet. Carmine had also promised that whenever he found her, he would do everything he could to make it happen for him.

Joey found himself suddenly wondering what Carmine would think of Katie and what she would think of Carmine. They were thoughts that he quickly shoved away.

The rough draft of the design done, Katie switched over to more personal topics.

"So is your top military or civilian?"

Joey smiled. "He's military. Lieutenant Commander Carmine Picone, he's one of the Navy SEALs."

Katie made a face and thought hard for a moment before replying, "I don't think I've met him. There are so many new people it's hard to keep track of who I've met already, but the name sounds familiar."

Joey gestured to his collar and asked, "So you're not seeing anyone?"

Katie frowned a little and Joey suddenly felt bad for asking. "No, I was seeing someone socially for a while, but our dynamic fit just wasn't good for the long-term. I'm just... I'm just not a masochist. Not in the least. And unfortunately he was a sadist."

Joey could see she that she was uncomfortable and said, "I get that. Neither am I and I'm thankful that Carmine and I are on the same wavelength about that."

Katie's eyes grew a little wistful and her voice was a little deflated as she replied, "It must be nice to have someone you fit so well with."

"Trust me, it took me a long time to find him."

Katie brightened a bit and said, "Well, they do say there is someone out there for everyone. I'll find my someone someday, I guess."

It was long past the end of the normal work shift for both of them and Joey hadn't realized how late it had gotten until Adrian strolled into the work area, his deep voice echoing. "Hey, almost ready to eat? I'm starving."

He paused when he saw someone with Joey and apologized. "Sorry, I didn't know you were in the middle of something."

When they both turned towards him, it only took a second for Adrian to smile and say, "Oh. Hi, Katie."

She smiled and said to Joey, "Now Adrian I remember meeting, and it explains why Commander Picone's name was familiar. But I don't understand, is Adrian related to your Commander Picone?"

"Yes, they are cousins."

"Favorite cousins," Adrian added as usual.

Katie replied, "That's nice, that you have family here on Atlantis."

Adrian's stomach gave a loud growl and he shrugged with an unapologetic grin. "I told you I'm starving. Do you have plans for dinner, Katie, or would you like to join us in the mess hall?"

"I'll have a take a rain check, I have plans with a couple of friends for a girls movie night."

The men readily agreed to a rain check and Katie left. As they watched her turn the final corner out of the area, Adrian nudged Joey and teased, "She's pretty."

Joey tried to glare at Adrian, but his flaming cheeks spoiled the effect. He settled for shaking his head and saying, "Let's go eat."

\---------------

By the third day, Joey had caught many glimpses of Commander Sheppard in the control room. Joey couldn't even fathom what thoughts and emotions were going through the outwardly composed Commander, he just couldn't imagine being told that someone he was in a relationship with was dead only to find out that they weren't. Joey's heart broke a little for the Commander and he made sure that his area was running completely by the numbers so as not to add to the Commander's burdens.

As Joey headed up the stairs in the control room to go to his normal appointment with Dr. Johnson, he briefly made eye contact with Commander Sheppard. The Commander gave him a cordial nod before turning his attention to a technician that called his name.

Making his way to the transporter, Joey had a flare of guilt over leaving his post to keep his appointment. He pushed the feeling away, however, reasoning that he was only taking an hour and that he would be at most three minutes away from his post if there were an emergency.

\---------------

Dr. Johnson studied Joey's body language for a moment. There was tension present in it, something that rarely occurred in Joey since being collared. But with the current situation on the city, and Carmine off-world with Colonel Sheppard, the tension wasn't unexpected.

Overall, she was extremely pleased with Joey's progress. She was also very pleased with Carmine although she kept that to herself. She had never worked with a patient's top that was so willing to follow her suggestions or do whatever he could to help. If she could have waved a magic wand and conjured up what she thought would have been the perfect Dom to help Joey rebuild his self-esteem and sexuality, the result would have been Carmine.

Joey shared that he was concerned about his sudden attraction to Katie Brown and they discussed it at length. She was pleased with the fact that he had no intention of hiding it from Carmine, but he still felt almost ashamed over it, as if it were some sort of betrayal of his feelings for Carmine. She offered clinically, "Have you considered that maybe because your relationship with Carmine is healthy and physically satisfying that you are just returning to being a more openly sexual person? You said in the past that you felt attraction to others while you wore Colonel Caldwell's collar, men granted, but did you feel like you were being unfaithful to him when that happened?"

"No," Joey answered simply.

"And in our last joint session, Carmine was very open about inviting a second submissive to play if and when you ever felt comfortable enough with the idea. I honestly can't envision him seeing this as any sort of an issue. What you're feeling is natural and healthy. Plus it's a big move forward for you and that will please him."

Joey nodded and tried to take her words to heart.

Later that evening, Joey and Adrian had a quiet movie night in Joey and Carmine's quarters. Three days of having their tops out in the field on a such a dangerous mission was wearing both men thin with worry, evident in the way neither of them really watched the movie they had playing. When the comedy that hadn't helped their moods at all ended, Adrian asked, "Can I crash here on the couch tonight? I just don't want to be alone."

Joey agreed, he had been feeling the same way and it surprised him just how quickly he had gotten used to having another person around.

He dug out a pair of Carmine's sweats to fit Adrian's long legs and a spare toothbrush before taking care of his own bedtime routine. They said their goodnights and Joey slipped between the sheets wearing a t-shirt and boxers and tried to turn his mind off from worrying about Carmine.

The night terror hit Joey about three o'clock in the morning. He was trapped in a nightmare with Borden until he heard Adrian's worried voice calling his name. Slowly Joey awoke in the sweat-soaked bed and tried to calm his panicked breathing. The shivers started almost immediately after he sat up.

Adrian had lived with a soldier long enough to know not to try to touch Joey until he was fully aware of where he was. Quietly he said, "Hey, it was just a dream. You're safe, there's nobody here."

Joey met Adrian's eyes in the low light and nodded. Adrian saw him shivering and quickly grabbed a towel and a dry set of clothes. He gently mopped Joey's face and gave his hair a rub to get the worst of it.

Adrian didn't hesitate or ask permission, he just reached down and peeled off Joey's soaked t-shirt and briskly started rubbing him down to warm him up. Joey's brain was still half-stuck in that nightmare dreamscape and he didn't actually realize what Adrian was doing until he heard Adrian croak out, "What the...?"

Adrian was ghosting his fingers over the scars on Joey's back and forced himself to shift so he could meet Joey's eyes and asked in horrified whisper, "Who did this to you?"

Joey swallowed hard and croaked out, "Major Raymond Borden..."

Joey found himself sharing his story in halting words as Adrian got him into a warm and dry t-shirt and sweatpants.

When he was done telling Adrian everything, Joey didn't know exactly what to expect. It would have broken his heart if Adrian had found him repulsive and tears of relief overwhelmed him when Adrian simply pulled him in and hugged him tightly. It was the best response Adrian could have given.

The two men quickly changed the damp sheets without talking and instead of going back to the couch, Adrian crawled in beside Joey and spooned around him protectively.

As they started to relax, Adrian asked softly, "So is that why you pushed Carmine off at first?"

"Yeah."

"He'll never hurt you, you know. And he'll never let anyone else hurt you either. None of us will."

Joey squeezed the arm Adrian had wrapped around him and whispered, "I know."

"I'm not known for always saying the right thing, but if you ever need to talk, I'll listen."

"Thanks, Adrian. For everything."

They were drifting off to sleep when Adrian whispered one final thing, "We all love you, Joey, you're not alone anymore."

With a little grin playing at the corners of his mouth, Joey fell asleep thinking that for a man supposedly not known for ever saying the right thing, Adrian had found exactly the right words.

They managed to catch a couple of hours of peaceful sleep before having to get up.

\---------------

On the middle of the fourth day the _Daedalus_ arrived with its bevy of visiting dignitaries and yet another mountain-sized amount of equipment. Joey was a little nervous about seeing Steven but he very much wanted to at the same time.

Seeing Steven was going to have to wait unfortunately as the _Daedalus_ remained in orbit ready to assist Colonel Sheppard if needed. Joey did snatch glimpses of the visitors though, and he caught one of them, a gorgeous black man about Steven's age in civilian clothes, giving him a thoroughly appreciative look-over from the railing. Joey's flush blossoming under the scrutiny of such an impressive Dom had been a foregone conclusion and it made the Dom grin pleasantly.

While the one visitor's interest felt normal and even a little exciting if Joey were to be honest, one of the other visitors, an Air Force General by the uniform he was wearing, gave Joey a cursory leer that made his blood run cold. Joey had seen the same madness in Borden's eyes and he had to fight back the panic stirring in his gut. Joey quickly headed back to his work area and forced himself to calm down.

\---------------

A while later Joey was finishing up his latest parts requisition when Colonel Sheppard and company came in hot. It was chaos in the gate room and there wasn't a person among them not covered in blood. Joey kept out of the way but managed to make eye contact with Carmine who mouthed, "I'm okay."

Joey could also see that Ramon and the rest of the team were also uninjured. He stepped around the corner and radioed Adrian to let him know so he wouldn't worry.

\---------------

As soon as he and Corporal James squared away all the equipment, Joey headed back home to their quarters.

\---------------

Of all the things that Joey expected to see when he entered their quarters, Carmine sitting on the floor with his weapons spread out around him and maniacally taking apart his sidearm and cleaning it was not on Joey's list.

Carmine was still in his grimy, blood-soaked clothes. He looked up at Joey's arrival, his eyes were full of pain and sadness.

Joey approached and knelt down beside Carmine. He laid a gentle hand on top of Carmine's and asked softly, "What do you need from me? What can I do?"

Carmine gestured to his weapons. "I have to clean them. It's something I do after... It's just something I do."

Joey nodded. "I understand. How about I get you something hot to eat?"

"That'd be good. I'm running on fumes."

Joey gave Carmine's hand a quick squeeze and stood. He headed for their cooling unit and pulled out some of the entrees that Adrian had stockpiled there. He quietly started them heating before moving to their dresser and pulling out clean sweats for Carmine.

Carmine worked wordlessly, letting the familiar motions of stripping and cleaning his weapons settle his mind.

A short while later, Carmine stood and placed his weapons on the small table near the entrance to their quarters. He walked over to the window and opened the door to let the fresh sea breeze air out the smell of spent gunpowder, oil, and blood. He stripped where he stood in that doorway, his eyes never leaving the ocean.

Joey was watching from the other side of the room, he was attentive but giving Carmine the space the other man seemed to need.

He was setting out plates at their dining table when Carmine's voice broke the quiet.

"There was this girl. A Genii. She couldn't have been more than seventeen. She was pretending to be afraid and looking for our help. She put two into one of our guys before we realized she had a weapon tucked in her skirt. She was aiming for Teldy and Colonel Sheppard next. I didn't even hesitate, I just threw my ka-bar and took her out."

Joey approached Carmine and hesitantly laid his hands on the big SEAL's shoulders.

"You did your job. Your protected your team."  
  
"I know. It's just... I'm old enough to be her father. And I can't figure out what kind of father does that to his daughter. Teaches her to kill without honor. It's one thing to raise your kids to be soldiers, it's another to make them stone cold killers with no sense of morality."

"I don't think we'll ever understand the Genii. You did the right thing. You got our people back and you came home to me."

Carmine raised his hands and rested them on top of Joey's.

"Yeah, I did. So what are we eating?"

"Adrian's lemon fake chicken, it's almost hot."

"Cool, I'm just gonna run though the rain locker. I'll be out in a few."

Carmine headed for the shower while Joey finished preparing their meal.

When Carmine came out a few minutes later with a towel slung low on his hips, Joey could see how red his skin was; Carmine had practically par-boiled himself in the shower.

Carmine put on the clothes Joey had laid out for him and stepped over to where Joey was slicing some bread to go with their meal. He gently took the knife out of Joey's hand and turned Joey around to face him.

Carmine leaned in and kissed Joey long and slow and like it was the only thing he wanted to do for the rest of the night.

Carmine finally pulled back with a grin. "Hi."

Joey tried to find working brain cells to reply. "Hi."

"Miss me?"

Joey finally cracked the grin Carmine was looking for. "You have no idea."

"Let's eat and you can tell me all about it."

\---------------

They sat and ate, Carmine's inhaling of his first plateful let Joey know how hungry the other man truly was.

Carmine was buttering some bread and asked casually, "So how were things with Adrian? Any issues? Any asses I need to kick?"

Joey swallowed what he had been chewing and took a big drink of water. "No, no asses to kick, but there is something you should know."

"I'm listening," Carmine said before breaking off a piece of bread and popping it in his mouth.

In a confident tone that sort of surprised Carmine, Joey explained about his night terror and his subsequent reveal of his past to Adrian.

"He was okay with it? You're okay with it?" Carmine asked with a little concern.

"Yeah, he was and he's very... I guess supportive is the word."

"He's good like that. He's got a big heart and he really does care about you. To him you're family, and that's that."

Joey grinned. "I'm starting to understand that. I don't think I really did before."

"So what about you? You seem pretty upbeat about it."

"It's weird. I've been so afraid of people finding out because I was worried about how they would look at me, like I was something broken or defective. But that wasn't Dr. Beckett or Dr. Johnson or Adrian's response. Everyone is shocked and disgusted _for_ me and not by me."

"I think you'll find that any decent human being would be, Joey."

"Yeah. It's kind of a relief, you know, having other people know about it. It's taken a little of the pressure off of me."

Carmine nodded and scooped himself out some more fake chicken. "So what else has been going on? Did you keep your appointment with Emily?"

"Yes, sir. We actually had a good session. And that brings up something else I need to tell you about."

"Well, you have been busy. What something else?"

Joey's cheeks began to flush, and within moments his face and neck were scarlet. In long and drawn out, embarrassed statements Joey finally managed to share the details of his meeting with Katie Brown, and his discussion about it with Dr. Johnson.

Carmine thought hard for a moment. "I don't think I've met Katie."

Joey's eyes were fixed on his plate and avoiding Carmine. Carmine reached over and gently cupped Joey's cheek in his big hand.

"Hey, for the record I agree with Emily. What you're feeling is healthy and natural and there is no reason for you to be ashamed about it."  
  
Joey looked up and Carmine could see relief easing the doubt they held.

Carmine gave Joey a little grin. "I told you that if you ever met a woman you wanted that I would do everything in my power to make it happen for you. So, should I make an effort to meet this mysterious Katie Brown that has you so twisted up?"

"We'd have to tell her about me. To explain."

"Yes, we would. Would you be okay with that?

"With her I think I am, she's a very kind and gentle person. But I don't know if it will all be a complete turn off for her or not."

"There's only one way to find out. But only if you want me to approach her."

Joey looked back down at his plate, his flush back in full force. He grinned and replied, "I would like that, sir, very much."

They finished their meal in companionable quiet.

\---------------

After dinner, Joey showered and joined a naked Carmine who was stretched out on top of the blankets on their bed.

Carmine pulled a nude Joey on top of him and kissed him. His big hands were roaming all over Joey's back and he was savoring the feel of Joey's soft skin over lean muscle.

With a playful little grin he teased Joey, "I love touching you, you know. Just like this."

"I love having you touch me like that. It makes me feel wanted and... loved."

"Well, you are," Carmine said and kissed Joey tenderly to emphasize.

With a suggestive wag of his eyebrows, Carmine asked, "So any suggestions on tonight's future activities?"

Joey's eyes locked onto Carmine's for a long moment, his expression thoughtful and serious. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again without saying a word.

"What?" Carmine prodded.

"I was thinking..." Joey's words trailed off and he swallowed hard. He took a breath and stretched to reach into the nightstand. He grabbed a tube of lubricant. Without a word, he pressed it into Carmine's hand.

Carmine's eyes darkened with lust, there was no denying that he had been looking forward to finally being inside of Joey. Slowly he licked his lips and asked gently, giving Joey a graceful out if he had just been impulsive, "Are you sure?"

Joey nodded and replied in a low near-whisper, "Yes. Very. But I don't think I can... I mean I don't know if we should..."

Carmine tried to make sense of Joey's stammering and hazarded a guess. "No bondage, nothing from the toy box. Just you and me, here in our bed, where you feel safe."

Joey nodded and Carmine smiled gently before quickly flipping them around so Joey was underneath him. He kissed Joey, toying with Joey's bottom lip with his teeth. He moved his mouth down to torment Joey's neck and teased, "I can work with that."

The lube was dropped casually off to the side and Carmine amused himself by using his hands and mouth to get Joey hard and needy.

While Carmine's mouth was teasing and nibbling on the inside of Joey's thigh, his hand found the tube on the bed. He shifted a bit on the bed and licked a wide stripe along Joey's cock. Softly he said, "I'm going to touch you now, it's just me here."

The briefest of flickers of tension ran through Joey as Carmine's slick finger gently entered him. Carmine looked up and was relieved that there was no sign of panic on Joey's face though. He turned his attention back to Joey's cock and balls. Slowly and surely Carmine worked his fingers and his mouth in perfect counterpoint. He had to work not to grin as Joey fisted the sheets as he tried to arch and writhe so turned on he didn't know which way was up.

Carmine's breath was uneven and hot against the sensitive skin of Joey's inner thigh as he asked, "Ready for me?"

Joey's own breathing was ragged and his mouth parched. He looked down and met Carmine's eyes and groaned, "Yes. Please, sir, please...."

Carmine sat up and quickly slicked up his own aching cock. He covered Joey's body with his and gently but firmly pushed himself inside.

Carmine paused and let Joey's body accommodate him. It also gave him a moment to breathe himself, he had expected the squeeze and the heat, but not the emotional punch of finally being inside Joey. That Joey trusted him enough to get beyond his past and welcome him into his body was almost emotionally overwhelming for Carmine.

He looked at Joey's face and saw no signs of distress or discomfort. He claimed Joey's mouth possessively and slowly began to move. Long and slow and deep he fucked Joey, like they had all the time in the world.

\---------------

There was to be no basking in the afterglow or falling asleep in each other's arms, however. They had just cleaned themselves up and flopped back into bed when Carmine's radio chirped on the nightstand. He quickly answered it, immediately sitting up and replying, "Meet me here in five."

Carmine turned to Joey and pressed a quick kiss to his mouth. "Something's going on with those visitors from the IOA. Ramon and Adrian will be here in a minute. I want you two to stay here until I know exactly what's going on."

Joey nodded and the two men quickly dressed. Just as Joey was pulling his t-shirt up over his head, their door chimed.

Ramon and Adrian looked about as disheveled as they did. There was a hard set to Ramon's face.

"What happened?" Carmine asked.

"From what I got, it sounds like General Jordan tried to rape Commander Sheppard."

" _What_?"

"Yeah. It gets worse though, Commander Sheppard defended himself and landed a good one to Jordan's face."

"Striking a superior officer, wonderful. He's a _Geisha_ for Christ's sake. This is going to be messy."

"Yeah."

Carmine turned to Joey and Adrian. "You two stay here. I've got to go see what's going on. I'm not specifically in the chain of command, but I am a ranking officer and this is going to turn the city into a fucking powder keg."

Joey and Adrian both nodded, and Carmine and Ramon turned and left, Carmine buckling on his sidearm as they walked.

\---------------

After getting a more accurate briefing on the situation from Master Chief Frost, Carmine and Ramon made the rounds about the city cooling flaring tempers where they could and correcting the misinformation about the incident that had morphed as it traveled from person to person like a game of telephone gone awry.

It was a long night, and the tension on the city was high.

\---------------

The gymnasium was packed to witness the morning's punishments. Joey envied Adrian a little in being a civilian and not having to witness it.

Joey stood at attention next to Carmine while General Jordan viciously administered the punishment. He couldn't help his eyes from wandering to Dr. McKay; he couldn’t even begin to think of what had to be going on inside the Courtesan as his Dom was so brutally beaten in front of him.

There was an almost tangible wave of satisfaction that went through the entire assembled company when the other visitor slapped General Jordan with the strap he had attempted to bring down across Colonel Sheppard's abused back for an extra lash.

As the company disassembled, Joey could see a hard set to Carmine's jaw. He laid a hand gently on Carmine's arm.

Carmine met his eyes and finally relaxed an iota. Joey said lightly, "I need to get to work. We've got a couple of teams heading out this morning."

Carmine nodded. "I'll walk you."

They walked to the control room, and like he did every other time he had walked Joey to work, Carmine kissed him tenderly right there in front of everyone before Joey headed down the stairs and off to his work area. Jordan and his escort were in the control room waiting for their dial-out and tension in the room was reaching explosive levels. Carmine went and stood in an out-of-the-way corner with his arm crossed and an unreadable expression on his face, and he didn't move until Jordan was finally gone from Atlantis.

\---------------

Even with all the turmoil on the city, Joey made sure to keep his regular appointment with Dr. Johnson later that afternoon.

"So that's a big step," Emily said cheerfully.

Joey blushed and answered back, "Yeah. I'd forgotten how much I like being penetrated."

Emily grinned again. "Was Carmine surprised when you offered?"

"A little. But you know him, he's good at going with the flow."

"Yes, he is. So you sound pretty happy about it all, am I reading that right?"

"Definitely, I just wish that we had done it sooner. It seems silly now to have waited. Carmine isn't Borden and he will never hurt me. Never. I feel like I should have trusted in that sooner. That's all."

"Joey, you're working to get past not only the violation of your body, but of your _trust_. Someone _you_ trusted, loved, and looked forward to making a life with, hurt you in ways that were more than physical. It's natural that you would be slow to build that level of trust again with another man, even one as gentle and honorable as Carmine. I've been listening to you tell me about your relationship with Carmine from its very beginning, and I have to say that as an outsider I think the way it has blossomed is beautiful. It's strong and healthy, and the pace at which you're taking everything seems to be working for the both of you."

Joey nodded and took a moment to digest her words.

Emily leaned back in her chair and prompted, "So, what else is new?"

Joey grinned and blushed. "I told Carmine about Katie Brown."

"And what was his reaction?"

"You were right, and..." Joe said, then paused like he was going to say something further but didn't.

"And...?"

"Carmine's going to talk to her, tell her about me and see if she'd maybe like to play with us a little."

"Are you apprehensive about that?"

"Honestly, not so much about me, I think she's a good person and her reaction is going to be like yours, Dr. Beckett's, and Adrian's. But I'm worried about how she'll react to Carmine's scars. I don't want him to be hurt by her reaction, or her rejection. He doesn't deserve that."

"If you really feel that she's a good person, what makes you think her reaction would be in any way hurtful?"

"It's not so much what people say or do, it's more that it reminds him that his scars are there, that he's not like he used to be. And he tries to hide it, but I know it bothers him."

\---------------

A week later Carmine was sprawled on the couch in their quarters, his laptop balanced on his stomach and he read through the day's announcements and schedule changes. Joey was at his desk working on his schoolwork. Carmine frowned upon seeing an announcement from Commander Sheppard and after reading it he called over to Joey, "C'mere for second."

Joey looked up and blinked, he had been thoroughly engrossed on what he was working on. He quickly went over to Carmine and asked, "What is it, sir?"

"I know today was crazy with the explosions and bomb sweeps and stuff but did you see the new 'no-go' list Commander Sheppard posted?"

"Yes, I saw that this afternoon."

"Good. I'm not sure exactly what Staff Sergeant Laville did to get on that list but I want you to be cautious around him, okay? If he in any way makes you uncomfortable or is disrespectful or if he touches you, I want to know immediately. And if I'm off-world, you find any SEAL or the Master Chief."

"Of course."

"C'mere," Carmine said and reached up and tugged Joey closer for a teasing kiss. He released him before it got either of them too worked up and said reluctantly, "Back to your books, young man."

Joey went back to his desk and picked up his pen to dive back in, but before he did he teased nonchalantly, "You know we really should try playing the stern headmaster and the naughty schoolboy sometime, that could be hot."

Joey deftly caught the throw pillow Carmine threw at him and chuckled.

Later that night when they were in bed and settling in to sleep, Carmine squeezed Joey tightly and said lowly, "I'm going to talk to Katie Brown. You're still good with that?"

Joey snuggled closer to Carmine and replied, "Yes, as long as you still are."

"I still am."

Joey was drifting off to sleep and whispered, "I hope you like her...."

\--------------

The next day Carmine had some free time and meandered down to the botany lab only to be told that Dr. Brown had gone to a very late lunch. He left a very curious group of botanists in his wake as he left the lab and headed for the mess hall.

"May I join you?"

Katie looked up from the magazine she was reading as she ate her lunch in the near empty mess hall. Standing in front of her was a large and imposing soldier that she didn't know, one that looked vaguely familiar, however. The side of his face that wasn't scarred was incredibly handsome and he gave off an air of self-confidence. His smile was genuine and appreciative and Katie was flustered at the attention. She said quietly, "Sir?"

"Sorry, Dr. Brown, I probably should introduce myself, Lieutenant Commander Carmine Picone, US Navy SEAL."

Katie smiled in an instant. "That's why you look so familiar, sir, you're Adrian's cousin."

Carmine chuckled. "Favorite cousin, but that's a family joke with a long story behind it. May I?" he asked gesturing to the chair in front of her.

"Um, sure."

"So I understand that you met my submissive, Joey Olsen, while I was off-world," Carmine said, opening the conversation.

Katie was nervous, did Commander Picone think she had been untoward to his submissive? She had found herself attracted to Sergeant Olsen and his gentle way, but she thought she had managed to keep that attraction to herself. She just hoped that Picone wasn't angry.

"Y...yes. We're working to design a new sample transportation module for the botany department."

Carmine nodded. "Well, that's right up Joey's alley. He likes figuring out how to make things work. He's studying to be an engineer did you know that?"

"He mentioned that he was taking classes but not about wanting to be an engineer. I think that's great, Commander."

Carmine was taking in all that he could about Katie. She was petite and graceful and her face was lovely. Her earlier smile had been blinding and he wondered if it was something she did often, because it was something he could definitely get used to seeing. He could tell that he was making her nervous, but it didn't seem to be from his physical appearance, rather it seemed to be stemming from his questioning her interaction with Joey.

"I'm very proud of him, he puts a lot of time and energy into his schoolwork. Anyway, you're probably wondering why I sought you out."

Katie nodded a little hesitantly.

A group of six sat down at the table next to them and Carmine frowned at their proximity. "It's nothing bad, I promise. Actually, I'm hoping it's going to turn into something great, but will you take a walk out on the pier with me? I need to tell you some things but I'd rather have a little privacy. We'll stay in sight of people, if that make you more comfortable."

Katie squinted a little and regarded Carmine for a moment before saying, "Okay. Let me just radio my lab and let them know where I'll be."

After she did just that, they headed out for the pier.

Carmine was trying to figure out where to start. He decided that finding out if she had any interest at all first would be the best way to go.

"So. Let me start off by saying that as a Dom I don't share my submissives with other Doms. I'm just not built to share like that. I have on occasion brought a second submissive into the mix when it's someone we're both attracted to. Following me so far?"

"Yes, I know of a few Doms with more than one submissive."

Carmine nodded in acknowledgment. "Joey has admitted two somewhat related things to me recently. The first, that he's never had sex with a woman before, or ever wanted to, and..." Carmine trailed off as they reached the edge of the pier.  
  
"And the second?" Katie asked quietly.

Carmine turned to face Katie so that she could see the sincerity of his acceptance of what he was about to reveal. "That he's extremely attracted to you and would very much like the opportunity to be with you."

Katie's mouth fell open in surprise. "He... he said that?"

"Yes."

"I don't know what to say."

Carmine grinned and teased a little. "Well, you could start by telling me how you feel about that."

Katie's blush blossomed across her cheeks. She could understand why Joey was so drawn to Carmine. He was charming and flirty with an aura of sex appeal and protectiveness around him. Her eyes were lowered as she replied softly, "I am attracted to Joey, Commander. And I would be honored to be with him..." Katie swallowed and raised her eyes to met Carmines, and said sincerely, "and with you."

"You read my mind, little one. That was my next question. And please call me Carmine."

Her eyes flicked to his arm and his ruined Master's marks and she asked, "May I ask where you trained... Carmine?"

Carmen looked down at his marks and snorted. "Yeah, I guess I really should get those redone at some point. I trained for two full sessions at _Casa di Bella Nascosta_ in Italy, and one session at _La Petite Mort_ in California. I have master's standing in both houses. "

"Oh, I've heard that the grounds at _Bella Nascosta_ are beautiful, all old world gardens with fruit and olive trees."

"Yes, the grounds are gorgeous, with all these little hidden areas to play in _al fresco_. I have few pictures in one of my photo albums. I can show you."

"I'd like that."

"And what lucky house did you grace during training?"

"I did one session at _La Petit Mort_ and I went abroad for a year at _Amores Breve Morte_."

"Another of Italy's fine houses. Tell me you speak Italian?"

" _Yes, but I am a little out of practice_ ," Katie replied in near-flawless Italian.

"You have hidden depths, little one, and I think I'm going to really enjoy getting to know you."

Katie's brow furrowed a little and she dropped her eyes.

"Did I say something wrong?" Carmine asked, seeing her expression.

"No. It's just been a long time since anyone wanted to get to know me and not just get me into bed," Katie replied a little sadly.

Carmine gently put a finger under her chin and raised her eyes to met his. "Totally their loss, Katie," Carmine said sincerely.

He got the smile he was looking for out of Katie and they kept walking to the end of the pier where Katie asked nervously, "Um, so Joey had mentioned in passing that you're not a sadist...?"

"Nope, not in the least. I'm not getting a masochistic vibe from you, so I hope that's a good thing."

Katie giggled. "No, I'm not at all. So it's a very good thing."

A sea bird flew by squawking and they watched as it landed in the water between the piers and a quiet moment stretched between them, and not an uncomfortable kind of quiet.

The bird flew off and Carmine gently cleared his throat. "So now that we've got the easy part of the conversation out of the way. There are some things about Joey that I need to tell you. Things that may or may not change your mind. All I ask is that you're honest with me one way or another after I've told you everything."

Katie's brow furrowed and she questioned, "Sir?"

Carmine's expression turned a little sorrowful. "About three years ago, Joey was brutally assaulted and almost killed..."

Slowly Carmine shared Joey's story with Katie and the horror _for_ Joey was written all over her lovely face.

When he was done with the telling, the anger and frustration Carmine felt over Joey's assault was hovering near the surface. He was trying to tamp it back down when Katie surprised him by laying a gentle hand on his arm and saying, "He must love you and trust you very much to have accepted your collar after all that."

"It's a love and a trust that goes both ways, Katie."

Katie nodded in response.

"So, does this change things for you? Our feelings won't be hurt if you say it does, I really just want you to be honest."

"No... no it doesn't change things. I just... I have questions? Like how physically Joey can be with me if he can't pen..." she trailed off.

"He's got this little silicone sheath thing that will help support his penis during penetration. He showed it to me. But, Katie, that's only one aspect of it all. Trust me when I say his mouth and fingers work just fine."

Katie's blush was back in a heartbeat and Carmine brushed a knuckle affectionately across her scarlet cheek before he continued, "Gotcha. All kidding aside, I think some of it we might have to figure out as we go. It's what Joey and I have been doing and it seems to work pretty well."

Katie went quiet, trying to put words together in her mind. She looked up and confidently met Carmine's eyes. "As I said before, I would be honored to be with Joey, and with you, Carmine. And as far as the rest, I'm good with figuring it out as we go along."

Carmine grinned and squinted at her playfully. "Really?"

"Really."

They turned and started walking back.

Katie hesitated but finally asked softly, "May I ask you something?"

"Always."

"How did you get your injuries?"

"My team was on a recon mission in a busy marketplace in Iraq. We had intel that insurgents were planning a bombing. Long story short, our intel was right and we found the bomb, but we only had a couple of minutes on the timer. So I picked it up and got it out the marketplace before it went off, but I got caught in the explosion."

"That was incredibly brave thing to do, you must have saved many lives."

That stopped Carmine in his tracks and he turned to face Katie.

"The market was full of people that day, and children. I couldn't just let the insurgents murder them."

"No, you couldn't," Katie said and reached up to gently place her hand on his ruined face. Her voice was soft as she asked, "Will you kiss me, sir?"

"As often as you want, little one," Carmine replied before bending his neck and gently claiming her mouth, inordinately pleased when she shivered and pressed closer to him in the middle of it.

\---------------

Carmine was off to the mainland for more training exercises with Colonel Sheppard and several teams and Joey was under strict instruction to make sure he ended his day at a reasonable hour.

He headed for a transporter and stretched as he walked, he had been working under a MALP for most of the day trying to diagnose an electrical short that was eluding him. He entered the transporter and hit the button that would take him to the mess hall.

He exited the transporter and almost walked smack into Katie Brown. Pulling himself up short he said, "Dr. Brown, hi."

Katie smiled warmly at him and he felt that same flutter deep in his gut that he had felt the first time she had done it. "Katie, please."

"Katie it is then."

"Is Commander Picone off on the mainland? I heard a bunch of the military teams were out there for some sort of training or something."

"Yeah, they left earlier. I don't think they're going to be back tonight."

"Oh. Are you... are you getting dinner?"

Joey grinned and rubbed his stomach. "Yeah. I spent all day under a MALP and I'm not in the mood to cook. I figured I'd see what the mess was serving instead."

"Would you... like some company?"

Joey was surprised but went with it. "That'd be great. Have you eaten?"

"No, that's where I was heading, too."

They turned and took a couple of steps down the corridor when Katie paused and placed her hand on Joey's arm.

He stopped and turned towards her. "What is it, Katie?"

"Commander Picone told me about what happened with... you. And I know you probably don't like to talk about it, but I wanted you to know that I know. I don't really know what to say to you about it. It doesn't change the fact that I _am_ attracted to you and have been since we met. I'm really looking forward to getting to know both of you better and seeing where that leads us... please say something and stop me from babbling."

"I'm glad you know. For so long I hid what happened to me because I somehow felt like it was my fault, but not anymore. I still have some issues I'm working on but I'm doing okay. You can ask questions, if I'm not comfortable answering I'll tell you, I promise."

Katie nodded and hesitated only a second before hugging Joey tightly. She apologized near his ear, "I'm sorry, I've just wanted to do this since Commander Picone told me everything."

Joey stood there for a moment like an idiot with his arms extended before giving in and hugging Katie back. It was certainly different from hugging Carmine or Steven, and he bit back the painful thought that the last woman to hug him had been the social worker dropping him off to a foster home when he was six.

He finally pulled back gently and said, "Let's go eat, we can talk more over dinner."

Katie stepped back a little and tugged on her shirt bottom to straighten it. "Sounds good to me."

\---------------

Steven was mentally trying to steel himself emotionally for the evening--he was having dinner with Joey and Carmine in their quarters.

He went to his closet and pulled out a small crate of wine bottles, the latest selection from his wine club. Around each bottle there were a couple of brochures from the vineyard held with a rubber band. He pulled one out and glanced through it.

The scenic images of the vineyard were gorgeous, and the wine making area was modern and well-kept, but it was the photo of a collar-wearing submissive that caught his eye. She had beautiful dark hair, and dark eyes and she looked to be Greek or Italian in heritage. She was sitting in a porch swing with a wine glass in hand and a pensive look on her face.

Steven thought she had a sad aura about her and he wondered why. His interest in her surprised him, he wasn't one for being attracted to another Dom's submissive, it just wasn't his nature, but there was something appealing about the woman and he chalked his interest up to not having had sex in while.

With a final glance at the woman's picture, Steven dropped the brochure back into the crate and stood with the wine bottle in hand. He tapped his radio and had himself beamed down to Atlantis.

\---------------

Their door chimed precisely on time and Joey answered it.

Joey answered the door and his smile was wide seeing Steven on the other side of it. "Steven."

"Joey."

It was difficult for both of them to not greet the other with the affection they generally shared, but they managed. Joey stepped aside and gestured for Steven to enter. He heard something sizzling and popping in a pan and there was a heavenly aroma of garlic and spices in the air.

"Something smells good," he said pleasantly as he turned to where Carmine was cooking.

Carmine's attention was on the pan but he said, "I hope you're hungry, Colonel, my _Mamma_ never taught me how to make small portions."

Steven stepped over to where Carmine was cooking and leaned over to inspect what was in the pan. "Starving actually. What are you making?"

Carmine looked up with a smirk. "It's supposed to be chicken marsala, sir. But out here we don't exactly have chicken, so it's chicken-wannabe, and I don't have any marsala wine, so we're winging it on that too, sir."

Steven held up the wine bottle, his big hand over the label. "It's not marsala but it's a really good red. And I think we can drop the sirs tonight."

Carmine nodded. "Sounds good."

Joey asked from where he was setting the table, "Latest from the wine club?"

"Yeah. I think I'm going to be ordering another case, I'm really enjoying this one."

Carmine nodded towards the bottle and said to Joey, "Why don't you open that so it can breathe a little."

Joey took the bottle from Steven and stood staring at the label for a moment before he started laughing.

"What's so funny?" Carmine asked.

Joey didn't answer, but instead he held up the bottle so Carmine could see the label.

Playfully Carmine teased, "Hey, the man's got good taste. What can I say?"

"What is it?" Steven asked, a little confused.

"That's from my family's vineyard."  
  
They all had a good laugh about it and Steven felt himself relaxing even though he wasn't quite sure that he should. Dinner was good and went well with the wine. Steven was watching Joey and Carmine, cataloging how _happy_ they seemed to make each other. There was no tension between them and Steven wondered if they were even aware how often they touched each other. They were good together in a thousand little ways that he and Joey just never were.

Their dinner conversation was casual, talking about work and Joey's schooling and other random topics. Steven found himself enjoying Carmine's company. After they had all eaten vast quantities of Carmine's wanna-be-marsala, Joey and Carmine got up to get coffee and dessert. Steven stood and stretched and amused himself by looking at some of the photographs displayed in their quarters. There were a few of Joey and Carmine, and a few that he knew where friends of Joey's, but there was a large quantity of others that had to be Carmine's friends and family.

One in particular caught his eye, it was of Carmine standing with his arm around the woman from the wine brochure. She appeared much happier in this photograph and Steven wondered what was different.

Carmine approached and handed Steven a cup of coffee. "That's my oldest sister, Maria. I think that was taken three summers ago."

"She's a beautiful woman."

"Don't think she doesn't know it, too."

"Don't they always?" Steven replied with a smirk.

Joey carried plates with slices of cake to the table and Steven and Carmine returned to sit. Steven's eye returned to the picture of Maria.

"She's in the brochure that came with the wine."

"Yeah, all my sisters take turns."

"She didn't seem all that happy in the brochure."

Carmine sighed. "Yeah, well, she hasn't been happy in long time."

Steven's eyebrow shot up and he felt a protective flare course through him. Was there a Dom in her life that needed his ass kicked? Although Steven couldn't honestly imagine Carmine letting anyone abuse a member of his family--Carmine's protective instincts were as strong as his own.

Carmine caught Steven's reaction and quickly clarified. "It's nothing like that, Steven. She lost her husband in the line of duty about a year ago. They were together since college and she's just taken it very hard."

"I'm sorry. Was he military?"

Carmine had taken a bite of cake so Joey answered for him. "No, he was fire fighter, he was killed fighting a wildfire in the foothills."

"Damn," Steven said softly, there just wasn't anything else he could say.

They finished their coffee and dessert and Carmine refilled his mug and said casually, "I'm going to go get some air on the balcony, give you both some time to talk."

Steven and Joey sat across from each other, neither knowing exactly what to say, it was something that had never happened between them before and they were oddly uncomfortable.

Finally Steven broke the ice and said, "I just have one question. Are you happy?"

"Yes," Joey said without hesitation, his smile radiant and genuine.

It hurt more than he thought it would but Steven forced a smile back and replied, "Then that's all I need to know."

Joey stuck his head out the door and let Carmine know they were done talking. If Carmine was surprised at the incredible shortness of their conversation, he didn't let on. Steven stood and prepared to leave. He met Carmine's eyes and got a brief nod letting him know it was okay to pull Joey into a chaste hug and press a familial kiss to Joey's temple.

At the door Carmine said, "I'll walk with you."

They had made it halfway to the transporter at the end of the corridor when Steven turned to Carmine and said, "I'm not going to lie and say that it's easy seeing Joey with someone else, but I want you to know that I _am_ glad for you both. You both deserve to be happy, and from where I'm standing you're able to do that for each other."

"He's everything to me, Steven. And I'm doing my damnedest to honor the gifts he gives me every single day."

"You can see that in his self-confidence, Carmine. He's getting back to the way he was before Borden."

Carmine nodded. "I think Atlantis is good for him."

Steven stuck out his hand. "Actually, Carmine, I think it's _you_ that's good for him. Atlantis was just the icing on the cake."

'I'm glad you came for dinner, Steven," Carmine said warmly and shook Steven's offered hand.

"So am I am. Good night."

Steven turned to continue on to the transporter and was almost there when Carmine called out to him. "Steven?"

Steven turned and faced Carmine who walked towards him and asked, "How extreme a sadist are you?"

He shrugged and replied, "Middle of the pack I guess. Why?"

"My sister. She's a masochist, one that also falls in the middle of the pack to use your words. Maria's a very private person, but I know she's lonely. You should visit the vineyard next time you're on Earth, say hello."

"Do I really look like I need to be fixed up?"

Carmine smirked. "No, not at all. I just saw how you looked at her picture, and honestly there isn't anyone I would trust more with my sister. I know what kind of man you are."

"I'll think about it."

" _Mamma_ is already familiar with who you are. Joey sent her a three-volume email with his life history. You're welcome there anytime."

Steven chuckled and shook his head. "I do have some leave coming."

Carmine grinned. "California is lovely this time of year... well any time of year really, but you know what I mean."

"I'll think about it, Carmine."

Carmine nodded and Steven turned and headed for the transporter.

\---------------

Things were quiet on the city with Colonel Sheppard back on Earth, and it didn't help matters that Dr. Weir had canceled their war games until his return. Carmine and the other SEALs spent a lot of time in the water, taking advantage of the time to stay familiar with the underside of the city and all its potential enemy entrance points.

Joey had finished his current coursework and was waiting for the next _Daedalus_ supply run for his next set of course books and materials to arrive and found himself with the unusual occurrence of having spare time to himself.

The two men also spent a lot of time with Katie Brown. It was casual and date-like. They ate together often in the mess hall and watched movies in one of the open lounges. She even convinced the two to join her at her yoga class, something that afterwards, both men laughingly admitted they had enjoyed and found relaxing. The three spent time out on a pier where some enterprising person had created a make-shift horseshoe pit that was generally in use by military and civilians alike, surrounded by good-natured betting and trash-talking. It had a carnival-like atmosphere that was a welcome distraction from the daily stress of the mission.

She got along well with Adrian and Ramon, and enjoyed sharing stories of her own childhood as they shared theirs.

Katie also shared her work with Carmine and Joey, and was surprised that they actually _cared_ and were interested in what she did.

They were waiting to play, however. Dr. McKay was Katie's choice to act as safety net and he was on Earth with Colonel Sheppard. In a way it was good, the three were forming a strong bond, built on genuine respect, affection, and attraction.

\---------------

Carmine blinked as the person walking with Colonel Sheppard registered in his brain. A heartbeat later a big grin spread over his face.

He approached the two men.

Ethan Marsh returned the grin and Colonel Sheppard appeared amused and said, "I take you two have met?"

Carmine replied, "Yes, sir. We've worked more than a few ops together."

Ethan stuck out his hand and said formally, "Commander Picone."

Carmine laughed and pulled Ethan into a brotherly hug. "Long time no see, Marsh."

Ethan clapped Carmine on the back and stepped back. "So how's your fiancee, Lisa? Wife by now, right? Is she here on Atlantis?"

Carmine shook his head lightly. "We split, after..." he trailed off and his fingers brushed his ruined cheek. "She just couldn't handle it."

"Sorry, man."

"As my pleasure master said, _her_ fucking loss."

Colonel Sheppard let out a little "hoorah" under his breath that earned him smirks from the other two men.

"Once I'm settled in, we'll have to catch up on shit, Picone. It's been a while."

"Yeah, absolutely. I'll even cook, your skinny ass looks like it could use some pasta," he said with a grin before turning to John, "Sir, I wanted to schedule a meeting with Dr. McKay to discuss entering into a social contract with Dr. Brown. Will you need to be present, sir?"

" _Katie_ Brown?" John asked in disbelief.

"Yeah. Joey likes her, I like her, and she likes us. We think it could be a win all around, sir."

"No shit. You are one lucky bastard, Picone. I don't have a problem with you meeting with McKay during his normal office hours, he's done that for other contracts he's negotiated. So, I take it Olsen is settling into his collar okay?"

"Yes, he is, sir. Actually we're both settling into it quite well."

"Good. I admit I was a little concerned for him when I accepted him into my command. But on a personal level you both seem content, and professionally Master Chief Frost raves about his job performance and wants to steal him for the Navy."

"He works very hard, sir, and it's nice to know that it's noticed."

"It's definitely been noticed, and don't tell him this quite yet, because I don't know when I can make it happen, but Frost, Lorne, and I have been discussing sending Olsen to OTS after he finishes his degree. He's organized and efficient and the people who report directly to him give him nothing but high marks in leadership, and god knows, we can definitely use more officers like that out here."

A goofy, proud smile grew on Carmine's face. "Thank you, Colonel. I won't say anything until it's finalized. And I'll make that appointment with Doctor McKay to discuss the contract."

The men made their goodbyes and Carmine walked away with a lighthearted spring in his step.

The moment Carmine turned the corner and was out of sight, the smile fell from Ethan's face and his brow furrowed.

"What is it?" John asked.

Ethan swallowed hard and said sadly, "It should have been me in that explosion, not Picone. That was supposed to be my op, but me and a couple of others on my team were in the infirmary with a nasty case of food poisoning so his team got called in at the last minute to take it instead."

"He doesn't seem to hold it against you."

"No, it's not his way. But it doesn't make me feel any better about the fucking situation."

"I know, kid. There are some things you'll always carry with you even if there wasn't a damn thing you could have done about it."

"Yeah. That sucks about his fiancee, he really loved her. She was gorgeous, but between you and me, she was a complete gold-digging bitch. None of us could stand her."

"He's recently collared a male submissive, Master Sergeant Joseph Olsen. He's in charge of our larger equipment, like the MALPs and ATVs. He's a good guy and they seem to be very happy from the scuttlebutt that I've heard."

"Good, Picone's a fucking hero. He deserves it."

John clapped Ethan on the shoulder and replied, "Yes, he does."

\---------------

Carmine lightly rapped on the door jamb to Rodney McKay's office with his knuckle. Rodney was completely focused on the data tablet in front on him and it took him a moment to look up.

"Dr. McKay?" Carmine asked respectfully.

"Oh, yes. Commander Picone. Please come in," Rodney said as he tried not to stare. He gestured to the empty chair in front of his desk.

Carmine sat down, keeping all of his movements friendly and his dynamic toned down.

"So you're here about Katie Brown?" Rodney asked.

"Yes. My submissive Joey Olsen and I have spent some time socially with Katie and there is a mutual interest on our part and hers in taking things to the next level. She informed me that you would negotiate a social contract on her behalf."

Prior to coming to Atlantis, Rodney had known some general information about Joey's assault, but not specifics, and it had taken him by surprise to find out that he had accepted a collar--most submissives to survive an assault like that either went non-dynamic or could simply never trust a Dom enough again to accept a collar. When he received the email from Carmine requesting a meeting, he had pulled up Carmine's file and read it cover to cover. When he was done, he had just stared at the screen. Picone was a model soldier and from all accounts a loyal and compassionate man. It had saddened Rodney to see the man's ruined face staring out from his file picture.

"I read your file, Commander. And though I don't know the specifics, I do know about Olsen's abduction and assault. And I know Dr. Brown. So let me ask you--why do you want to contract with her?"

"If I tell you something in confidence will you promise to keep it between us?"

"Of course. With the exception being if I am asked about it directly by Colonel Sheppard."

"Completely understandable. So, here's the thing. Joey has never been with a woman in his life, and before meeting Katie he had never found one sexually arousing before. There is just something about her that has Joey completed turned on and I think it's wonderful."

"Never?" Rodney asked incredulously.

"Never. I promised him when he told me that if and when he did find a woman that he wanted, that I would do everything I could to make it happen for him, so here I am. But that doesn't specifically answer your question does it?"

"Yes and no."

"After Joey told me about Katie, I went and talked with her for a while. She's soft and gentle and beautiful, and so... graceful. And what's amazing is that she's just as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside. She makes me want to hold her and protect her from the world and make her smile. At the same time I want to give her everything and anything she could ever need or want, physically or dynamically."

Rodney cleared his throat at Carmine's heartfelt words. "You realize if you ever said all that to her that she'd be in tears the rest of the day."

Carmine frowned a little. "I've got a sneaking feeling that it's been a very long time since anyone's treated her like she should be treated."

It was Rodney's turn to frown. "You wouldn't be wrong on that, Commander. She's seen some very harsh treatment in the past that she definitely didn't deserve."

Carmine raised an eyebrow. "Is the Dom responsible here on Atlantis?"

Rodney caught the undercurrent of deadly rage in Carmine. It was the same one that flowed in John and Lorne and Gerard and any other decent Dom when they heard about a submissive being abused.

"No. He was but he's long gone now, and isn't in a position to hurt anyone ever again."

"Good."

"I'll be honest with you, Commander, there isn't anything in your file or here in person that makes me hesitate about Katie contracting with you. Your training and dynamic meshes nicely with hers, and I'm not getting any sort of a bully vibe from you. Are you planning on being exclusive with your collared submissive and Katie?"

"Absolutely. In fact the three of us discussed condoms and we've all mutually agreed that after we enter the contract that we will all go for a physical and blood work and will be forgoing the use of condoms once that's done."

"That's a big step."

"That is the trust and commitment I have with my current submissive, and the level of trust and commitment that exists between us and Katie. We aren't just looking to hook up and play, Dr. McKay, we're looking to include Katie in our relationship as an equal member."

"Hmph," Rodney replied and thought for a moment before asking, "How long do you intend to contract for?"

"We all decided that three months would be a good place to start and that at the end of three months we'll have the options to end it if it's not working out, or extend it if we want to, but what I actually see happening is Katie accepting a formal collar from me and we make it permanent."

"Anyone ever tell you that you're a hopeless romantic?" Rodney asked with a chuckle.

Carmine grinned back. "All the time actually, Dr. McKay."

\---------------

Carson handled their three physicals with amusement. If had been a betting man and shown a picture of Carmine and asked if he thought that the big man would end up with not one but two of the gentlest submissives Carson had ever met, he would have bet against it. Yet here the three of them were in his infirmary, the virtual ink still drying on their social contract.

When he was finished he asked Commander Picone to stay behind for a moment. Carmine did and allowed Carson to lead him to a private area for their conversation.

"Is something wrong, Doctor?"

Carson smiled gently. "No, on the contrary. I have, what I hope, is good news for you."

"What is it?"

Carson held up the healing wand he had grabbed on his way in. "This is an Ancient healing wand. Until recently they weren't very efficient or powerful enough for major healings and they took a painfully long time to recharge when we used them. Doctor Kusanagi was able to repair the charging station for them and now they are nothing short of a miracle as far as the injuries they can heal _and_ they now recharge in minutes."

Carmine looked at the device in Carson's hands curiously. "That's great, Doc, but I don't have any injuries, so why tell me?"

"Two-fold reason actually. One, I believe that I can use the wand to repair the vascular damage done to Sergeant Olsen's penis. With the exception of the lost testicle, it should return his genitals to fully functioning."

Carmine's mouth fell open. "Are you serious?"

"I am ninety-nine point nine percent sure that it will work. I'm giving myself a sliver of an out, but I truly believe this will work."

"That's... I don't even have the words, Doc."

Carson reached over and patted Carmine's arm. "I know. Especially now that you're embarking on this new relationship."

"Are there any risks? Could it make it worse?"

"No. It will either make it better or not work at all."

Carmine swallowed hard. "You said your reason was two-fold?"

"Aye," Carson said and pointed to Carmine's scarred arm, "May I?"

Carmine nodded and Carson activated the wand and ran it over a thick rope of scar tissue. Slowly the scar began to fade until there was nothing but healthy smooth skin remaining.

Carson deactivated the wand and tactfully looked away as Carmine traced the smooth area with visibly shaking fingers. He gave Carmine a moment then said, "With the amount of scar tissue you have, it will take a while, but we can fix all of your scars."

Carmine tried to speak, but the lump in his throat wouldn't let him. He cleared his throat and asked, "And Joey's back?"

Carson nodded. "Aye, his won't take long at all. Whenever you're ready, we can get it done."

\---------------

Joey entered their quarters in a rush. Carmine would never have radioed him in the middle of his shift if it wasn't important. He didn't see Carmine right away, he wasn't in the main living area or out on balcony. The door to the bathroom was open and the light on, however, and Joey quickly headed for it.

He wasn't prepared to see Carmine standing with his shirt off standing in front of the mirror staring at his own reflection, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Joey asked in a panic.

Carmine met Joey's eyes in the mirror and raised his hand and stroked his scarred cheek. "I never let myself hope... that these could ever be fixed. I had to let go of that so I could just accept them and move on, you know?"

Joey didn't know what to say, not really. He had never seen his Dom in such an obviously emotionally exposed place before. Gently he replied, "Yeah, I know."

"Doc Beckett's got this healing tool. It will get rid of all of the scars. Yours and mine. Look here," Carmine said as he pointed to his arm. "He used it for less than a minute here and the scar is just gone."  
  
Joey's fingers ghosted over the patch of smooth skin on Carmine's arm. It looked as if someone had simply dragged an eraser over his arm and left a path of perfect skin in its wake.

"Is this for real?" Joey asked with a lump in his throat.

"It's real. And," Carmine turned around to face Joey and continued, "he thinks the tool would fix the vascular damage to your penis."

Joey felt a little lightheaded at that and grabbed the edge of the sink to steady himself. "That's..." he couldn't finish the thought.

Carmine pulled him into a bone-crushing bear hug and hoarsely finished for him, "Huge, I know. I'm still trying to get my head around it all."

"When can we do this?"

"I scheduled it for tomorrow."

\---------------

The next day, however, brought a new crisis when Scott Holland kidnapped Dr. McKay. Their appointment with Beckett was forgotten in the fray as Carmine and the other SEALs all readied their dive gear and headed for the jumpers, hoping against hope to find the downed jumper.

Joey and Corporal James readied all the equipment they thought could possibly be asked for, but an underwater recovery just wasn't their area of expertise and all they could do was worry and await news, the same as everyone else on the city.

A very dead Scott Holland was recovered, and an agonizingly long time later, the news spread that they had found Dr. McKay, a little beaten up, but alive.

Carmine had two very shaken subs to soothe that night, both Joey and Katie were very upset by the events of the day. They ate a quiet dinner in Carmine and Joey's quarters. Carmine then spent the rest of the evening with each of them tucked under an arm on the couch, a movie playing that none of them really watched. As it got later, Katie seemed to cling to Carmine even harder, not wanting to go back alone to her quarters.

The three of them hadn't played yet. They were supposed to have played together for the first time the night before, but the news of the healing wand had made them all agree to push it off until after their appointment with Beckett. Now tonight, none of them were in the mood to play.

Carmine turned and pressed a kiss to the side of Katie's head and asked gently, "Do you want to stay with us tonight?"

Katie nodded and replied softly, "Please."

"Okay," he said and turned to Joey, "Let's get ready for bed. Grab a toothbrush and one of my t-shirts for Katie to sleep in."

"Yes, sir," Joey replied and eased off the couch to do just that.

In short order, the three of them were soon snuggled under the covers, Carmine on his back with a submissive under each arm. They slept.

It didn't surprise Carmine that both of them had nightmares at some point in the night. Joey's was a relatively minor one that he quickly woke from at Carmine's gentle shake of his arm. Katie's however, was a doozy.

She flailed about and begged, "Please, let me go Dr. Kavanaugh, please...."

Carmine stroked her arm and said gently, "Katie. Time to wake up. You're having a nightmare. Katie."

The dream had a hold of her though, and wasn't letting go. She fought against Carmine and the blankets and ended up on the floor, finally waking up. She was panicked and breathing hard and absolutely terrified.

Joey quickly turned on the light, and from the bed he and Carmine gave her a moment to realize where she was. Finally Carmine asked, "You okay?"

Looking ready to cry, she looked up at the two men. "No. He had me and wouldn't let me go. He took me away from Atlantis... somewhere cold and dark. No one came to find me."

Carmine was off the bed in an instant. He knelt in front of Katie and said, "Little one, I will _always_ come for you. Always. To the edge of the fucking universe if I have to, and you know that there are people here that will help me figure out how to go further than that if I have to."

Katie sobbed and Carmine pulled her into his arms and held her tightly and let her cry. Joey got out of bed and gently draped a blanket around Katie before kneeling beside Carmine, his hand finding Katie's.

When Katie had finally quieted, Carmine cleared his throat and asked, "Dr. McKay had mentioned that you had been on the receiving end of some pretty harsh treatment in the past, Dr. Kavanaugh's handiwork I presume?"

Katie nodded against his chest.

"Katie, you never, _ever_ have to worry about him again. He's long gone and in jail back on Earth. I'm going to know where that fucker is for the rest of his life I promise you. And if by some fluke he ever got out of jail, he would be a dead man if he came with a mile of you." Carmine pulled back so he could see her eyes, and continued, "That's a promise, little one."

He pulled her back in toward his chest, glad she couldn't see his face and his expression when she admitted, "He used to say I was just a whore, just a hole for him to use. And that I must be useless even for that because no Dom had collared me."

Carmine met Joey's eyes, both men fuming at her words. Joey's eyes went to the dresser and back to Carmine. Carmine gave him a little nod and Joey quietly got up and went to the dresser, coming back with a square flat box.

Carmine got to his feet and sat on the edge of the bed, taking Katie with him. "Katie, I can't erase what that bastard said or did, just like I can't fix what Borden did to Joey. All I can do is work to build the trust between _us._ You are incredibly beautiful, and smart, and funny. And you're someone who Joey and I are both honored _and_ surprised that would want to be with us. You've got a gracefulness and light in you that brings amazing gentleness into our lives. I told Joey before I collared him that it wasn't just about sex or dynamics between he and I, that I wanted to build a _life_ with him and it's the same with you. We both care about you and we're already halfway in love with you. Joey and I picked this out the other day." He nodded to Joey who opened the box to reveal a simple, but beautiful gold ladies' collar that one of the supply rats had on hand. "This is where I see us heading. It's not just play, Katie, we want you to be part of us, permanently."

She reached out towards the collar with shaking fingers. She looked between Joey and Carmine and asked, "You want to collar me?"

Carmine answered, "Yes, when you're ready."

Katie looked to Joey who gave her a little smile and said, "We want you to be part of our family, Katie."

Kate looked at him incredulously, she knew what family meant to Joey, it wasn't a word he threw around lightly.

She looked back to the collar in the box and wanly grinned a little. "I have to admit that I was afraid that after our three months that you might not want me around any more. I didn't let myself hope for this."

"And now, little one?" Carmine asked playfully.

Katie looked to him and gave him a blinding smile. "I'm ready."

Katie stood and dropped the blanket and without hesitation pulled the baggy t-shirt over her head and knelt wearing only her skin in front of Carmine.

Joey knelt next to her and held the box up for Carmine.

With no further words said, Carmine picked up the collar and deftly clasped it around Katie's neck. As the lock clicked shut, all three had a sense that everything had finally fallen into perfect place for them.

The rest of the night passed in a haze of hands and mouths and pleasure given and received as the three of them connected physically for the first time. It was a gentle and sensual beginning to their relationship.

As Carmine drifted off to sleep, ending his night the way it had begun, with a submissive under each arm, his hands were gently stroking each of their backs. Katie's was smooth and soft as silk, Joey's was soft with lean muscles and Carmine's fingertips could pick out the lines between his scars. As the nights event's replayed in his head, Carmine realized that all three of them were scarred, Katie's were just on the inside where no one could see. And just as he had had the confidence that he could be the Dom to rebuild Joey's self-esteem, he knew that he and Joey could repair the emotional damage Katie tried to hide.

Carmine fell asleep with a little grin on his face.

\---------------

A week later, Carmine had his clothes off and was sitting on a towel on an out of the way pier, enjoying the sun. His newly healed skin was a little lighter than the rest and he was trying to even it out. It had taken hours to heal his face and the majority of his scars. He would need to go back for another, shorter round of healing to finish up some of the deepest scars, but the transformation was amazing.

Joey was in a pair of swim trunks and sitting between Carmine's legs. Carmine's sure hands were smoothing sunscreen on Joey's now smooth back. Joey's healing had been complete, the wand going so far as to even out the skin tone of the healed area. It was as if the vile scar had never existed.

Carmine reached around with his slippery fingers and teased one of Joey's nipples as he leaned forward and sucked on Joey's earlobe. He slipped his free hand into Joey's swim trunks and found his cock _very_ hard and interested. The healing wand had worked exactly has Carson had promised it would.

He worked Joey's cock and nipple simultaneously and said huskily in Joey's ear, "You said once that you used to like to have sex in public. How'd you like to take a ride on my cock out here where everyone can see?"

Joey groaned and replied, "Your will is mine, sir." He quickly stood and shamelessly shucked his swim trucks, his erection now solid and leaving no doubt that he was aroused.

Joey fished a tube of lube out of the small duffle bag next to them and knelt between Carmine's legs and thoroughly slicked his cock. A moment later he was situating himself to slowly ease himself down on it. They set a slow, lazy pace that matched their lazy, lounge in the sun day and Carmine amused himself by touching Joey everywhere but his cock. Joey was soon almost mewing, so turned on he didn't know which way was up, his cock ruddy and leaking with need.

"Please, sir... _please,_ " Joey begged.

"I've got you," Carmine promised and finally wrapped a firm grip on Joey's aching cock.

Carmine forced Joey to keep that same slow pace and it built Joey's release to a fever pitch. "I'm coming, sir. I'm coming," he gasped out as strong stripes of come hit Carmine's chest.

Carmine's hands moved to the formerly scarred area of Joey's back, his sensitive fingers finding no trace of the horrific scar. When that thought registered in his brain, his own release hit him like a truck and he pressed up as hard and deep into Joey as he could.

They flopped back and mopped themselves off with a towel.

A little giggle from their left made both men turn their heads.

Katie was lounging on her own towel, the sun glinting off her collar, a mix of amusement and lust evident in her eyes as she looked at the two men.

Carmine worked hard not to compare either Joey or Katie to Lisa, but sometimes it was hard. Like now, Lisa would have had a flare of jealousy in her eyes that she had been excluded, but not Katie. Katie loved watching Joey and Carmine together, and the two men had found out quickly that she had a pretty strong voyeurism kink. It worked for them and it worked for her. They were enjoying discovering all the ins and outs of their dynamics. The three of them were good together physically, dynamically, and most importantly, emotionally.

Carmine knew that though the healing wand may have fixed both he and Joey's bodies, only time would heal the emotional scars all three of them bore, but as he crooked a finger to Katie and pulled her in for a teasing kiss, he realized that the three of them were well on their way already.

\---------------

_Every base has urban legends about scenes taken too far and submissives maimed or killed, most are simply myth, made up of half-baked truths and dark fantasies. Some however, are based in fact, and are horrific beyond reason and some would say for those involved, beyond bearing. When the stories are shared over beers or in harsh whispers in the locker room, few would ever hope to meet a survivor from one of those dark tales. Little do those storytellers know, but those survivors exist, and they walk among them..._

_...sometimes being the happiest and most beloved submissives around, because after all, time, and love, heals._

\--------------- _  
_  
the end.

_  
_

 

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to take a moment and address some things that were brought up in comments to Time Heals.
> 
> 1\. The addition of Katie Brown into Carmine and Joey's relationship
> 
> I am a polyamorous person by nature and enjoy reading/writing stories that explore healthy, fulfilling poly relationships. That being said, Ties That Bind is a perfect universe in which to plant a poly relationship and watch it bloom.
> 
> Dynamic-wise, Katie was good fit for Carmine. She's not a masochist in the least, complementing the fact that he's not a sadist. She's also a little damaged, with self-esteem issues- would she really have let Kavanaugh get away with what he did had she not been? As we saw with Anka and with Joey, Carmine has deft touch when it comes to subs with issues. So again, Katie was a good fit. 
> 
> Katie and Joey work together for different reasons. For a second sub to have worked in his relationship with Carmine, Joey needed someone that wasn't going to compete for Carmine. He didn't need some overly confident, pushy sub entering the picture and causing his own self-esteem problems to spiral. Enter Katie who is just as broken as he is emotionally and would never purposely hurt him out of spite. It was a good fit.
> 
> I've been wondering if the reception to the poly relationship would have been different if the third person I introduced into Carmine and Joey's relationship was male. It's something I'll just never know.
> 
> 2\. My decision to have the healing wand fix both Joey and Carmine
> 
> I had always intended to end this story around the point in TTB where Miko fixed the healing wands. It would have felt like a massive disservice to TTB to have ignored the potential of the wands' ability to fix Carmine and Joey's injuries. I know some people feel that it was too cookie-cutter perfect an ending, but I couldn't justify the techology being available and not utilizing it. 
> 
> The one thing I was adamant about while I wrote this was that I wanted their relationship to be completely formed and rock-solid prior to their bodies being made whole again. I think I more than accomplished that, and because I did, I'm actually very pleased with the ending.
> 
> 3\. The possibility of an epilogue - aka the much in demand vineyard visit.
> 
> No promises. But I do have some random paragraphs started and I've been running through possible scenarios in my head. We'll see.
> 
> 4\. Caldwell
> 
> I discovered an entirely new appreciation for Caldwell as I wrote this fic. I actually never minded Caldwell on-screen but I've always hated how he's been portrayed in fic. I'm really glad that so many commenters liked how I handled Caldwell in Time Heals, he turned out to be a nice guy after all.
> 
> 5\. Carmine and Lisa's relationship
> 
> I know there were a few people that asked about Carmine and Lisa, and why he would have stayed with her if their relationship was so bad.
> 
> In a nutshell, the expression "love is blind" covers this nicely. Carmine was head over heels in love with Lisa. He didn't see her faults and he didn't see that they really didn't have much in common. Dynamically and sexually, they were a perfect fit--it was just everything else that was a train wreck. It wasn't until he was no longer with her that he could see her for what she really was (and what everyone else saw her to be). It wasn't until he was with Joey and in a healthy, caring relationship with someone that met all of his needs that he could look back on his relationship with Lisa and see just how bad it was.
> 
> 6\. The pace of the story
> 
> I know some people mentioned that the pace felt hurried at times in comparison to the amount of material in TTB. Honestly, there is much going on in TTB that the average Joe on Atlantis isn't privy to, so there are large chunks of Keira's plot that weren't included in Time Heals because it just wouldn't be anything my characters would either be involved in or know about.
> 
> Also I'm not a huge fan of the rehashing of canon in fanfic. Fics that drone on for paragraph after paragraph full of episode details bore me to tears. In this instance, TTB is my source canon, and I had no desire to rehash Keira's words in the same way. It just doesn't work for me.
> 
>    
> I hope this clears up a few things. If anyone wants other questions answered, comment here or email and I'll see what I can do! :) ~CJ


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